Holy 5hit, I'm rusty

[Desdinova]

Over the last year, I've barely had to work to get a woman. That's because I was in two LTRs over the last year. The first one lasted 5 months, the last one 6. And now that I got rid of the last one, I've been putting myself back out in the field. I'm not looking to get into a LTR again, at least not for the next little bit. I'm just looking for a lay

...and I find myself in a drought.

My social circles have disbanded, and my social life suffered due to spending time with the women in question. Therefore, I don't really have any prospects (unless I wanted to fvck the fat orbiter I have, but that comes with social consequences).

Then again, I'm not putting a lot of effort into getting women either. I don't have much of a desire to do so, but yet still want something to fvck. I've put myself back on online dating sites, but it takes a lot of effort to get a date out of those. I had one date on Friday which went fairly well, but the POF curse seems to have taken it's toll.... She was a new member. Despite a good first date with lots of rapport and high interest, she's flaking. It's likely due to all the male attention she's receiving. So I've abandoned messaging her. It's possible she'll contact me again after being on dates with a couple of AFCs, but I'm not getting my hopes up.

I'm mainly waiting for my divorce to finish up. I've also been a bit stressed by all the changes going on at my work. With all that stressful 5hit looming over me, it's no wonder that my aura hasn't been glowing like it usually does. It seems that my success is directly proportional to the amount of stress in my life. When I'm stress-free, the women surround me.

So yeah, with the amount of stress in my life and my lack of being in the field, I'm going through a drought. Everything should clear up a bit by the new year.

 

[VikingKing]

I hear you man, sometimes we sound like these delusional women when we talk about how we want to be single for a while haha. What a lie. when I want to be single it means I want to be dating three women at once. Im "lucky" in the sense that as soon as I actively pursue voluntary celibacy, the women start coming out of the woodwork. Anyone who thinks this site doesn't help us demonstrate value is an idiot.

anyway I recommend that you scope out some churches and look for the favorable male female ratio. I ended up with a bunch of guy friends but hey, my guy friends have been with me since childhood,past hoes are nowhere to be found

Rough. Hang out where there are women, and a bunch of betas. (you know of these places) get into the social circle. Spit your game, you snakey snake you.:flowers:

 

[jimmy18]

Buy a trombone

 

[Desdinova]

when I want to be single it means I want to be dating three women at once.

Bwahahaha!!! That's so true! To me, being "single" means fvcking without caring. Where did this solitary 5hit come from???

I recommend that you scope out some churches and look for the favorable male female ratio.

I may end up doing that in the new year after the divorce is done. I also don't want to be around churches during Christmas. I don't want to be expected to attend services on Christmas eve.

Buy a trombone

I have a guitar, a clarinet, a harmonica, a banjo, and a piano. Speaking of which, I promised a chick who plays in a band that I'd write a song for them to perform.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Des,
Dance lessons will get someone in your bed within a Month!

 

[Johnny Alias]

There's always the standards... Being at peace with being alone, working out, online dating, etc to get your mojo back.

The big one to me? You said all your social groups disbanded. Find more. Facebook events are the best to meet people. Just go out a lot with zero expectations. Make friends with women AND dude with no ulterior motive.

Fact is socially you need to meet women and women run in packs that hang out with dudes. That's it a nutshell. Get social again.

 

[Vulpine]

Fortunately for you, it's holiday party season. Easy pickin's.

Go to any and all you're invited to: the booze is cheap. Plus, new circles are brought into your regular venues.

Probably most helpful for you would be to get a handle on remaining "desire-less". The püssy didn't run and hide because it heard you were on the loose. Nope, potential plates are everywhere. When your preoccupations subside, you'll see them, and you'll be in a better frame-of-mind to scoop them up.

'Till then, holiday party action to get you "in the mode"!

 

[Desdinova]

So I've got more 5hit flying through my life. My workplace has recently been taken over by women managers. I'm being hauled into the office for working overtime. I've got a union rep attending to stand up for me.

It's time for me to find a new job as opposed to finding a new woman.

 

[goodganji44]

I would recommend going MGTOW for about 1-2 weeks. Knock out a few errands you've been meaning to do or work on some music. Get back in the game a lil bit....rinse and repeat until you land something solid


70% MGTOW
30% Women


I would say that's would be a fair balance of getting sht done and enjoying life on your terms and searching for companionship w/o sacrificing too much time

 

[RangerMIke]

I think you need to be completely disengaged from your marrage before you start trying to hook-up with women. The fact that your divorce is not final is a problem. If you want to date to improve your game, then fine... you will need the practice, but don't go into dating with the idea that you want and expect sex. In fact, your attitude right now should be that you will NOT hook up no matter how well it goes. Try to disengage your actions from expected results. Date with the idea that you are trying to improve your skills... i.e. practice. Monks go their whole lives without sex, waiting a few months while a divorce is getting finalized is not a problem, and will help you develop self-control which women find attractive.

Jumping into a relationship with anyone after a LTR has potential problems. What you have to be aware of is that often you will find yourself looking for women completely different from the women you were in a LTR with. That might be the right answer, but it has to come from objective analysis not in a chaotic emotional state.

I know that women do this all the time, but men and women are different, women are guided by their emotions, men CAN NOT be driven by their emotions unless their goal is to turn off women. If a women sences you are guided by your emotions they will be turned off because if you are driven emotionally, then she can't be and THAT is what she wants. Two emotonally driven people can not make a relationship work because someone has drive the ship. Women want men to be the captian of the ship, they might say "OOOH look at that pretty island, let's go visit!", they want a man to say "Honey, I'm sorry, if we go there we will be late, and maybe run out of fuel. Let's plan this properly and come back later."

 

[Desdinova]

The fact that your divorce is not final is a problem.

It hasn't been final for the last 4 years and I've been consistently banging women. The way it's affecting me is having the huge lawyer payment looming overhead. That's knawing away at me and preventing me from giving off the 'content in my own skin' aura. Once it's no longer an issues, I'll be fine. I could care less about my actual marital status.

don't go into dating with the idea that you want and expect sex. In fact, your attitude right now should be that you will NOT hook up no matter how well it goes.

So if I have a naked and willing woman standing in front of me, I'm supposed to tell her "Sorry, but my marriage isn't finalized yet." Yeah, I'm not turning down free puzzy.

What you have to be aware of is that often you will find yourself looking for women completely different from the women you were in a LTR with.

No, I'd be looking for a woman who doesn't have the same 5hitty qualities that the last one did. I can find something good in nearly every woman I've dated, but I need to decide if I can put up with whatever bad qualities she has.

 

[RangerMIke]

Well first of all I had no idea that your diverse was 4 years in the making.... WOW! I can't imagine that hell could be worst. Mine took a year (because of the State we lived in) and I thought I would lose my mind. Clearly you have a complicated marrage. My brother's divorce took almost 3 years, but he was married to a real loon. He could have gotten out of it sooner but he got tied up with another loon... his ex found out because he was posting his new girl all over Facebook... Not suggesting you are doing that... but IMO all your energy should be devoted to getting OUT of your marrage. My brother got distracted by his new freedom and all it did was make things worst.

I agree that having a divorce looming ahead screws up your game. When I was separated it definitely sucked up my emotional energy. Four years of that would have driven me nuts. You have my sympathy. I assume she is fighting you... what does she want? I guess you are going to have to decide if what she wants isn't worth your sanity. My ex and I are getting along fine... we split everything down the middle with joint custody of the kids. I guess I'm lucky.

 

[Desdinova]

She didn't start the divorce process until two years after I kicked her out. The lawyers have been dragging it out for the last two years. The only thing bothering me about the whole thing is the money I have to pay the lawyer. Everything's been settled. The whole thing is almost over. I'm anxious for it to be done and start putting my money to good use again.

I've got no feelings for my ex-wife. Believe it or not, I got over her during the marriage. I couldn't love someone who was never home. When I ended it, it felt like a sack of bricks had been lifted off me. I was actually relieved.