Exactly! And this is why many on here have no clue! As to why I stated it! As for the worthy posters, I definately know of a few, but it is hard to tell these days!Originally posted by IronFar
I don't believe I've heard one person (that is a worthy poster) talk about "being a jerk... all the time".
It isn't about that. That commentary is mostly for the EXTREME AFCs here. Some of these guys are so far gone that only EXTREME 'jerk-like' behavior MOST OF THE TIME can bring their manhood back.
I am shocked to see ppl being on here for damn near half a decade and not understand the common principles. It's sad really.
Hmm So.. Now what? Next?
- Thread starter Social Engineering
- Start date
I also definately disagree with the notion of "not getting back with an ex".
From my own perspective, I have seen many relationships break up (especially when young), and the two get back together and live happily for over another decade (and these couples are still together). WestCoaster, you are probably basing your opinion over the fact that you were burnt and your own experiences.
Much of the time, getting back with the ex will be a time bomb. But if you love her, and can see the love in her eyes, there is very good chances that you can get back together and both adapt to make it a very workable and loving relationship. If you both love eachother, you are willing to put in the effort. (this is why it is a must you can see she loves you also). Further, pride must be put aside, and this attitude of, I will always do what I want MUST go out the window! You both have to give 100%! If she does not, she is not worth your time!
From my own perspective, I have seen many relationships break up (especially when young), and the two get back together and live happily for over another decade (and these couples are still together). WestCoaster, you are probably basing your opinion over the fact that you were burnt and your own experiences.
Much of the time, getting back with the ex will be a time bomb. But if you love her, and can see the love in her eyes, there is very good chances that you can get back together and both adapt to make it a very workable and loving relationship. If you both love eachother, you are willing to put in the effort. (this is why it is a must you can see she loves you also). Further, pride must be put aside, and this attitude of, I will always do what I want MUST go out the window! You both have to give 100%! If she does not, she is not worth your time!
My 2 cents
Yea I am an AFC - more rather an rAFC at this point. So take my opinion for what it is worth. You are treating this woman like a machine - one of your workout machines. Of course she left you. Romance is there for a reason - it must be used to maintain a relationship - doing an "AFCish" thing ONCE in a while SPONTANTEOUSLY (she should not be telling you what she wants all the time!) shows a woman that you actually value her (she does need to feel special sometimes!).
What I have learned from boards such as this and MASF is that such "romancing" should never be done before she gives you something - it is only a reward. But some of you guys take that to an extreme - you actually think women are plyboards to stick you **** into and then put into the garage...if that is your attitude stick to ONS. Really.
Yea I am an AFC - more rather an rAFC at this point. So take my opinion for what it is worth. You are treating this woman like a machine - one of your workout machines. Of course she left you. Romance is there for a reason - it must be used to maintain a relationship - doing an "AFCish" thing ONCE in a while SPONTANTEOUSLY (she should not be telling you what she wants all the time!) shows a woman that you actually value her (she does need to feel special sometimes!).
What I have learned from boards such as this and MASF is that such "romancing" should never be done before she gives you something - it is only a reward. But some of you guys take that to an extreme - you actually think women are plyboards to stick you **** into and then put into the garage...if that is your attitude stick to ONS. Really.
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Bill S. Preston Esq
Don Juan
Guys, penkitten and solace hit it on the head.
This wasn't some chick he was interested in, it was his GF. One that Social didn't take too seriously and from it looks like he really just wanted a fcukbuddy.
This was more than likely a keeper. All she wanted is for Social to be a boyfriend. She might have left on a whim, but she still wonders what you're up to. She wants you to come back.
You're always going to have problems with women but this one seemed like she was really laid back and since you were first, you didn't get the baggage that older more experienced women get.
If you think she was too much trouble though, I doubt you'll find another woman that let you have it your way for as long as 7 months.
In the meantime, she'll probably get a guy that actually appreciates her and doesn't use her as a sex toy.
This wasn't some chick he was interested in, it was his GF. One that Social didn't take too seriously and from it looks like he really just wanted a fcukbuddy.
This was more than likely a keeper. All she wanted is for Social to be a boyfriend. She might have left on a whim, but she still wonders what you're up to. She wants you to come back.
You're always going to have problems with women but this one seemed like she was really laid back and since you were first, you didn't get the baggage that older more experienced women get.
If you think she was too much trouble though, I doubt you'll find another woman that let you have it your way for as long as 7 months.
In the meantime, she'll probably get a guy that actually appreciates her and doesn't use her as a sex toy.
Social Engineering
Don Juan
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Update on my little situation:
Well i stumbled upon this thread...
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=81990&highlight=kiss+of+death
and it hit the nail on the head
She craved it and i didnt supply.
Well i got in contact with her again and said what she needed to hear. Things are going quit well. This was soely my mistake not hers. I didn't fullfill my needs in the relationship at all. Yet she was exceeding all mine.
Me, well i was doing the DJ thing to the extreme. The entire relationship i was doing tips tricks and freestyle moves. There is a transition from dj'ing to a relationship wich alot of guys on here just dont get. How much of a Don Juan are you if you can get woman yet they flow through your hands like water... Great you can get a girl... But.. Can you keep her? That to me is a Don Juan.
So the relationship is even better then before, shes all about me and the sex couldnt be any better. Lesson learned once you have the relationship you can't keep the dj thing, you can do small things but the playing field does change. No need to be an AFC but if you dont meet her AFC needs the relationship will not last. I learned it myself.
Thread over, and thanks for everyones input.
Well i stumbled upon this thread...
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=81990&highlight=kiss+of+death
and it hit the nail on the head
She was and is a keeper. This wasn't just some girl i was tagging it was a LTR in the making. 7 months i said the words "I love you"... Once...
She craved it and i didnt supply.
Well i got in contact with her again and said what she needed to hear. Things are going quit well. This was soely my mistake not hers. I didn't fullfill my needs in the relationship at all. Yet she was exceeding all mine.
Me, well i was doing the DJ thing to the extreme. The entire relationship i was doing tips tricks and freestyle moves. There is a transition from dj'ing to a relationship wich alot of guys on here just dont get. How much of a Don Juan are you if you can get woman yet they flow through your hands like water... Great you can get a girl... But.. Can you keep her? That to me is a Don Juan.
So the relationship is even better then before, shes all about me and the sex couldnt be any better. Lesson learned once you have the relationship you can't keep the dj thing, you can do small things but the playing field does change. No need to be an AFC but if you dont meet her AFC needs the relationship will not last. I learned it myself.
Thread over, and thanks for everyones input.
