boogieman2188
Don Juan
Ok, so basically I’d like a little insight on what everyone thinks of this situation. I went to school with this girl that I never really talked or paid much attention to since 7th grade. (We’re now in 10th)
So a about a month ago, I decided I need more girl friends that are closer to home because I seem to know more from other counties. So I set off to get to know her. She’s also attractive, I need to add that for clarity, if she weren’t attractive, I wouldn’t have wanted to get to know her to begin with. So I get her myspace, I talk to her a bit. Then I get her AIM screen name. She gets my phone number from one of my away messages, and then we start texting each other. Now, she’s a softball player and is very much focused on that more than anything at the moment since (this was then, we just lost states last night) we’ve made it to state finals. So I start going to her games, we hang out. A casual roller blade/bike ride along the water followed by lunch at a sports bar. This was not considered a date though I might add. We paid for our own meals, and it was just in nice company.
So, I consider all this very good progression. Now, she’s in state softball finals, and they win the semi-final. The next day was finals. We were all so convinced they’d win, that I had planned to ask her out after her win to make her night even better, since I had the feeling she was really into me. I go, her team loses. My new focus is cheering her up, not asking her out. Fortunately we have a long drive home to talk, in this case text each other. I keep telling her that she’s awesome at softball to not let this get her down. She’s happy again. The next day we sit together at lunch, again, we hit it off well. Everything seems great. She has an early dismissal, I meet her mom, and her mom really likes me she says. We text each other for a couple more hours here and there throughout the day, then, once I’m home from school, before I leave for work, she stops texting me, says she’s just tired when I asked what was wrong. I go on her myspace profile, and find that she has taken me off of her top friends. Something seems odd, but I didn’t want to jump to any conclusions.
So I go to work. When I get home, I check my myspace to find a message from her. It states that she had to go somewhere when she stopped texting me earlier in the day. I reply that I’m glad that was all, that I thought I had made her mad when she all of a sudden stopped texting me and after I had noticed that she had taken me off her top friends. Then she replies saying that she wont be able to hang out anytime soon, she’s busy with school and softball. She also adds that she doesn’t think anything more than a friendship will work. That she wants to tell me that before things get too far and she ends up hurting my feelings or worse. She says it’s just as hard for her to write it as it is for me to read it. So I reply saying that she’s the perfect girl I could ask for. But that I respect her decisions and if she wants to take things easy, I’m cool with it.
Basically, I was pretty sad that all this happened. So I log onto AIM, to find her on. I ask her if we can talk, that I just want to talk about anything to ease my mind. She agrees. We’re talking, and all of a sudden, there’s talk about how we can’t remain friends in fear of me trying to get with her. She almost gets defensive about it. Now things start to get interesting. She tells me that we can’t hang out anymore. That she doesn’t want a boyfriend and for me and her to stay friends would be too hard because she sees me trying to get with her.
So now I try to patch things up. I tell her how I am in these situations, and bring up an ex-girlfriend and how the almost the same situation happened and we remained friends after a little bit of time as a buffer zone. She now thinks that I’ll, yet again, try and hook up with her. So finally she asks me a question for closure. She wants to know why I started talking to her to begin with. So I reply: (straight from AIM conversation)
“ok, i remember you from ms.*******’s class, you always had the best grade, you always did the right thing, you were a good student, i was a slacker, and i never cared about anything really, well, since me and Katie are like bro sis, we talk a lot, and we never directly talked about you, i just always knew that you were an awesome softball player, and that to be on a sports team, you need to have good grades and stuff so that aspect hadn't changed much, and i saw you around school here and there, mostly at lunch, and i say some of the people you hung out with, i didn't know them, but i know most of the bad, and they certainly weren't bad, so i knew you must still be a good person. so i thought to myself, i need a cool girl i can trust and all this, and i started talking to you, but i guess i got too over myself, that i started liking you, which i realize now was a bad decision seeing all the mess its created”
She now understands why I started talking to her a little better and decides to go to sleep and let things cool off over the weekend. Depending on how she feels, she will let me know what she thinks Monday. Now, I’m looking for any advice from anyone about what to do or what they think is going on. If you’re unclear about something or want more detail, please let me know as I am very frustrated and just want some help with this whole situation.
Do you think that she’s afraid to like me because she’ll get hurt like she has in the past? Do you think she thinks it’s too good to be true therefore it must not be true? She says she doesn’t believe someone her perfect man will come in high school. Not saying that I would be, but I think you understand what I’m conveying. Any help is appreciated.
Thank you.
So a about a month ago, I decided I need more girl friends that are closer to home because I seem to know more from other counties. So I set off to get to know her. She’s also attractive, I need to add that for clarity, if she weren’t attractive, I wouldn’t have wanted to get to know her to begin with. So I get her myspace, I talk to her a bit. Then I get her AIM screen name. She gets my phone number from one of my away messages, and then we start texting each other. Now, she’s a softball player and is very much focused on that more than anything at the moment since (this was then, we just lost states last night) we’ve made it to state finals. So I start going to her games, we hang out. A casual roller blade/bike ride along the water followed by lunch at a sports bar. This was not considered a date though I might add. We paid for our own meals, and it was just in nice company.
So, I consider all this very good progression. Now, she’s in state softball finals, and they win the semi-final. The next day was finals. We were all so convinced they’d win, that I had planned to ask her out after her win to make her night even better, since I had the feeling she was really into me. I go, her team loses. My new focus is cheering her up, not asking her out. Fortunately we have a long drive home to talk, in this case text each other. I keep telling her that she’s awesome at softball to not let this get her down. She’s happy again. The next day we sit together at lunch, again, we hit it off well. Everything seems great. She has an early dismissal, I meet her mom, and her mom really likes me she says. We text each other for a couple more hours here and there throughout the day, then, once I’m home from school, before I leave for work, she stops texting me, says she’s just tired when I asked what was wrong. I go on her myspace profile, and find that she has taken me off of her top friends. Something seems odd, but I didn’t want to jump to any conclusions.
So I go to work. When I get home, I check my myspace to find a message from her. It states that she had to go somewhere when she stopped texting me earlier in the day. I reply that I’m glad that was all, that I thought I had made her mad when she all of a sudden stopped texting me and after I had noticed that she had taken me off her top friends. Then she replies saying that she wont be able to hang out anytime soon, she’s busy with school and softball. She also adds that she doesn’t think anything more than a friendship will work. That she wants to tell me that before things get too far and she ends up hurting my feelings or worse. She says it’s just as hard for her to write it as it is for me to read it. So I reply saying that she’s the perfect girl I could ask for. But that I respect her decisions and if she wants to take things easy, I’m cool with it.
Basically, I was pretty sad that all this happened. So I log onto AIM, to find her on. I ask her if we can talk, that I just want to talk about anything to ease my mind. She agrees. We’re talking, and all of a sudden, there’s talk about how we can’t remain friends in fear of me trying to get with her. She almost gets defensive about it. Now things start to get interesting. She tells me that we can’t hang out anymore. That she doesn’t want a boyfriend and for me and her to stay friends would be too hard because she sees me trying to get with her.
So now I try to patch things up. I tell her how I am in these situations, and bring up an ex-girlfriend and how the almost the same situation happened and we remained friends after a little bit of time as a buffer zone. She now thinks that I’ll, yet again, try and hook up with her. So finally she asks me a question for closure. She wants to know why I started talking to her to begin with. So I reply: (straight from AIM conversation)
“ok, i remember you from ms.*******’s class, you always had the best grade, you always did the right thing, you were a good student, i was a slacker, and i never cared about anything really, well, since me and Katie are like bro sis, we talk a lot, and we never directly talked about you, i just always knew that you were an awesome softball player, and that to be on a sports team, you need to have good grades and stuff so that aspect hadn't changed much, and i saw you around school here and there, mostly at lunch, and i say some of the people you hung out with, i didn't know them, but i know most of the bad, and they certainly weren't bad, so i knew you must still be a good person. so i thought to myself, i need a cool girl i can trust and all this, and i started talking to you, but i guess i got too over myself, that i started liking you, which i realize now was a bad decision seeing all the mess its created”
She now understands why I started talking to her a little better and decides to go to sleep and let things cool off over the weekend. Depending on how she feels, she will let me know what she thinks Monday. Now, I’m looking for any advice from anyone about what to do or what they think is going on. If you’re unclear about something or want more detail, please let me know as I am very frustrated and just want some help with this whole situation.
Do you think that she’s afraid to like me because she’ll get hurt like she has in the past? Do you think she thinks it’s too good to be true therefore it must not be true? She says she doesn’t believe someone her perfect man will come in high school. Not saying that I would be, but I think you understand what I’m conveying. Any help is appreciated.
Thank you.
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