High indicators of interest but no sex after 3 dates?

[way2smart]

So I met this new girl at the beginning of December. I have been asking her out on a date once a week and it's been going great so far. The big problem is that she never initiates contact first. I am always the one to text and schedule the next date, she is always very receptive and we always have fun when together.

I tried to have sex with her but she turned sex down twice. To be fair we only had about 3 dates so far. When we are together on a date she always touches me and can't get her hands off me which indicates she has very high interest level in me but her turning sex down really caught me off balance.

What's up with this chic? Is she following some kind of stupid rules or something? If she wasn't interested she wouldn't have gone out with me in the first place.

Should I wait a week before scheduling our next date ? or should I start asking her out more often? Like I said she is always very receptive and always makes time for our date.

 

[exhausted]

So I met this new girl at the beginning of December. I have been asking her out on a date once a week and it's been going great so far. The big problem is that she never initiates contact first. I am always the one to text and schedule the next date, she is always very receptive and we always have fun when together.

I tried to have sex with her but she turned sex down twice. To be fair we only had about 3 dates so far. When we are together on a date she always touches me and can't get her hands off me which indicates she has very high interest level in me but her turning sex down really caught me off balance.

What's up with this chic? Is she following some kind of stupid rules or something? If she wasn't interested she wouldn't have gone out with me in the first place.

Should I wait a week before scheduling our next date ? or should I start asking her out more often? Like I said she is always very receptive and always makes time for our date.

She's not a ***** and actually has some value.
If every girl had sex on date #3 with every guy they started to date they would be with 30 men sexually by the time they got married.
Sounds like you have an interested girl who has good value. This is a good thing.

 

[djthiago1]

Guess what, not all women are sluts.

 

[Urbanyst]

She is probably just not ready yet.

Might be one of those girls who need to really trust you and believe you plan to stick around before getting sexual. Consider yourself lucky to find a woman who (maybe) doesn't have a stretched out vagina lol.

 

[Dash Riprock]

My guess is you are very young, around 18-20 maybe? Just because a girl doesn't put out after a few dates doesn't mean she's not interested. And, some girls will not initiate contact for many reasons even though they are interested.

Here's a tip: you can continue to listen to your lame friends who will tell you to try and f*uck on the first few dates OR show some class and be a DJ about it. Yeah, some of the young people here will say ESCALATE! but it's immature and can also work against you, unless you're only in it for the sex.

Be cool, go with the flow, call her every few days, see her once/twice a week, and when she's ready she's ready. Quit freaking out. Don't be a mindless p*rick and try to FORCE the issue if she's not ready--like the other 100 guys she's dated did. Be different if she's worth it to you. Girls who put out way too early are usually sluts and ones who call all the time can be very needy.

 

[way2smart]

My guess is you are very young, around 18-20 maybe? Just because a girl doesn't put out after a few dates doesn't mean she's not interested. And, some girls will not initiate contact for many reasons even though they are interested.

Here's a tip: you can continue to listen to your lame friends who will tell you to try and f*uck on the first few dates OR show some class and be a DJ about it. Yeah, some of the young people here will say ESCULATE! but it's immature and can also work against you, unless you're only in it for the sex.

Be cool, go with the flow, call her every few days, see her once/twice a week, and when she's ready she's ready. Quit freaking out. Don't be a mindless p*rick and try to FORCE the issue if she's not ready--like the other 100 guys she's dated did. Be different if she's worth it to you. Girls who put out way too early are usually sluts and ones who call all the time can be very needy.

I am 29 and divorced twice. She is 25.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I am 29 and divorced twice. She is 25.

Wow. Surprised that you're concerned she hasn't "put out" after a few dates, then. Would you respect her more or be more inclined to date her if she did? I wouldn't.

 

[way2smart]

Wow. Surprised that you're concerned she hasn't "put out" after a few dates, then. Would you respect her more or be more inclined to date her if she did? I wouldn't.

I am more concerned about the possibility that she might have ****ed some Chad Thundercock on the first date before and allowed her to be a bad girl, but now that she met me, she conveniently becomes a nice girl with "value".

Obviously I don't know if she ****ed anyone else on the first date, but that possibility exists, she is 25 after all, right?

 

[Building_and_Loan]

I am more concerned about the possibility that she might have ****ed some Chad Thundercock on the first date before and allowed her to be a bad girl, but now that she met me, she conveniently becomes a nice girl with "value".

Obviously I don't know if she ****ed anyone else on the first date, but that possibility exists, she is 25 after all, right?

If she's an attractive girl, then she has. But don't dwell on that.

Just continue doing what you already are. Be enjoyable yet aloof and not bvtthurt when she declines your advances again. She's likely screening to make sure you're not just in it for her vag.

Are you only seeing her, or do you have other girls you see? If you do, I'd subtly let her know she's not the only girl you spend time with. This could trigger her competitive side and speed things up with you physically.

 

[way2smart]

If she's an attractive girl, then she has. But don't dwell on that.

Just continue doing what you already are. Be enjoyable yet aloof and not bvtthurt when she declines your advances again. She's likely screening to make sure you're not just in it for her vag.

Are you only seeing her, or do you have other girls you see? If you do, I'd subtly let her know she's not the only girl you spend time with. This could trigger her competitive side and speed things up with you physically.

Yes I am seeing and f*cking another girl, but this one is definitely a higher priority (probably because she is more of a challenge to me) at least for now.

But how would I subtly bring up that I am ****ing another girl. When she asks me what I did last night, should I just say I had an amazing sex with a plate I am spinning?

 

[sazc]

wait....what? Where's all the 'drop her if she hasn't fvcked you yet' comments?

 

[Dash Riprock]

wait....what? Where's all the 'drop her if she hasn't fvcked you yet' comments?

Exactly. The reason I thought OP was likely a "boy" vs a "man." DJs don't care when the sex happens, 3 dates or 3 months, because we are in control and focused on other things. Some of this s*hit you just cannot "teach"...

 

[marmel75]

Relax and keep escalating. It will happen eventually if she is interested enough. As long as you arent apending big money on her its all good. Some women are very cautious because they are afraid or have been burnt by guys who hit it and quit it.

 

[El Payaso]

Have y'all at least made out?

 

[way2smart]

Have y'all at least made out?

Yes, we kissed several times. She also holds my hand when we walk in public

 

[Building_and_Loan]

Yes I am seeing and f*cking another girl, but this one is definitely a higher priority (probably because she is more of a challenge to me) at least for now.

But how would I subtly bring up that I am ****ing another girl. When she asks me what I did last night, should I just say I had an amazing sex with a plate I am spinning?

No don't do that. That's the opposite of subtle.

When she asks what you did last night, just mention you hung out with "my friend Sarah" or whatever her name is. Then when she asks who Sarah is, just smile and say don't worry about it. Let her wonder who she is and what you did. Just deflect and change the subject, because really, you don't owe her any explanation since you're not exclusive.

Has she been to your place yet? Assuming of course other girls have left stuff behind at your place, like hair clips, etc., strategically leave them in a place she would notice it. Sounds nuts but girls notice that kind of thing. She'll think "Whose hair scrunchy is that?!?" and get more attracted to you without even realizing it.

 

[way2smart]

She has you in the boyfriend box.

You may find her leading you as you walk absent-mindedly around a garden-centre, or walking around markets or some sh1t early on a Saturday morning a few weeks from now. And you may ask yourself, "how did I get here?".

And you may think "I don't even fvcking like plants. I'd rather be in bed."

You start as you mean to go on.

Lol this made me laugh. Yes I don't like plants and no amount of ***** will make me like them.

 

[Trump]

wait....what? Where's all the 'drop her if she hasn't fvcked you yet' comments?

Waiting for the ‘try and emotionally connect with her and build a full blown relationship based on love, trust and respect’ comments.

 

[Urbanyst]

She has you in the boyfriend box.

You may find her leading you as you walk absent-mindedly around a garden-centre, or walking around markets or some sh1t early on a Saturday morning a few weeks from now. And you may ask yourself, "how did I get here?".

And you may think "I don't even fvcking like plants. I'd rather be in bed."

You start as you mean to go on.

LOL.

 

[Mazer]

She has you in the boyfriend box.

You may find her leading you as you walk absent-mindedly around a garden-centre, or walking around markets or some sh1t early on a Saturday morning a few weeks from now. And you may ask yourself, "how did I get here?".

And you may think "I don't even fvcking like plants. I'd rather be in bed."

You start as you mean to go on.

Listen to this man. Probably holding your hand one night and holding some other dudes **** in the same hand the very next night. Every date there should be more and more escalation. An example,

Date #1 Kiss
Date # 2 makeoutage
Date #3 makeoutage with hands under clothing
Date #4 oral
Date #5 Bang