Her Level Of Comfort

[slickaz]

Ok,
so heres a question for the LTR and mature DJs here.

ive got an LTR.
i trust her, shes loving and all that good stuff. high IOI etc.
touchwood it stays that way.

now ive noticed lately (and i have not told her this) that she texts me through the day lesser than she used to, but the texts have the same emotion.
she also doesnt complain that i dont ring her as much anymore, she did once. but then accepted that im busy at work and she totally understands.

i dont call her or contact her like we used to back in the day, when she used to ring me in the morning n wish me goodmorning, and then say can you please ringme in an hour when ill be on my way to work.
sometimes i used to ring her, maybe twice a week id ring her in an hour.

then in the PM she'd ring me again and say can you ring me tonight?
so i would.
but anyway, she doesnt complain now that i dont do it as much.

is that because she has settled into it?
is that because she thinks she cant do anything about it? but would like to?
will this period bring about change in the way we communicate?

its just a questions that im wondering will affect the IOI thats all..
not over thinking it

 

[Charm&Style]

You're in a settled and matured relationship now, dont worry about. Think of your parents, do they call each other every second of the day to show their affection? No. Yet the "love" still exists in their relationship.

You both have lives and the more you two are intertwined in each others lives the sooner you will get tired of each other. Take advantage of the time that passes for yourself, for your own well being and at the same time be chill and affectionate. Now if her attitude changes while you two are out then that is a different issue...

 

[Tazman]

People naturally cool off the longer they're with somebody, and I wouldn't worry about less phone calls and texts, that's a very minor thing.

In fact, you don't want to be in "constant" communication with her because too much exposure to each other leads to boredom, predictability and then complacency.

As long as you haven't noticed anything drastic like her not returning your phone calls and not hearing from her for weeks at a time, I wouldn't worry about it.

Give her the gift of missing you sometimes. Getting paranoid about it is going to bring out behaviors in yourself that will make her "want" to get away from you.

I made the mistake of calling a girlfriend at a time she specified every night, not thinking that I was complying with this like she was the boss. I took it to mean she was really happy to hear from me, and she probably was the first couple of times, but her interest dropped soon after. Worse part was that I didn't call her all those times because I actually wanted to talk to her, I just did it because she wanted me to.

Zero challenge on my part and verrrrrry predictable.

 

[slickaz]

yeh thing is, lately ive noticed that she just texts me like
can you please ring me.

and ill ring her, she does it maybe once every two days or so.
and i do ring her, because she has strict parents, she is unable to get out alot! and also talk alot on the phone, so alot of my calls to her will be around her time.

but she rings me alot more when she can get away from her folks and talk.
but im not specific about times when she can ring me coz i dont have the restrictions that she has at home.

she's looking to move out soon so..that'd be good!

im going to stop ringing her when she asks me, but when i do ring im still going to give her the same affection on the phone but just not as much, so she can miss me.

when we hang out, nothings changed, she still has her hands on me, all the time...so i guess you're right its only coz we've settled into it.
thats cool with me