Her: "I don't want to date anyone from work", But we're still "going out" on sat

[alec11]

Ok, here's the situation...

I was really liked this girl from work for a while. I thought I was getting some positive signals from her, such as looking at me in a certain way, and we seem to share many of the same interests. So I finally asked her out last week. She was going out of town for the weekend, but when I suggeted that we do something else sometime, she replied "yeah" pretty enthusiastically.

Yesterday I asked her to go to a museum with me on saturday. The conversation went like this:

Me: "Hey, what are you doing on saturday?"
Her: "I'm having dinner with a neighbor."
Me: "What about during the day?"
Her: "Nothing."
Me: "How about coming to [insert name of museum] with me?"
Her: (slight pause, not too enthusiastically) "Yeah, that could be good.... yeah."
Me: "Ok, how about 1:00, I'll meet you on the steps."
Her: "Ok."

At this point I felt pretty good, but I had this feeling the other shoe was about to drop.... It did.

Her: "Can I ask you something? Is this a romantic thing?"
Me: (nervous laughter) "What does that mean?"
Her: "Well. I don't want to date anyone from work."
Me: (taken aback and unsure what to do) "Why not?"
Her: Blah, blah, blah... dont want my whole life to be at work, blah, blah...
Me: Don't remember what I said here, probably just nodded.
Her: (with this sad puppy dog look on her face) "Ok?"
Me: I think I just nodded again.
Her: "So I'll see you on saturday at 1:00."

Then she left.

So, the way I fugure it, I have four basic options.

1) Make up some stupid exuse why I can't go, make her get the point that I'm not interested in anything except a "date", and leave it at that.

2) Go to the musuem with her and just give in and be friends.

3) Go the museum with her and be confrontaional, call her out on her bull**** exuses.

4) Go to the museum with her and just treat it like a date. Pretend that she never said what she said.

So, based on the above conversation, do you guys think I have any chance and what would be the best strategy for me to use in order the salvage the situation. The thing is, I really really like her, and I don't know how easy it will be for me to just let go (despite everything this board teaches about "nexting" and so on).
If you would like any clarification or more info, let me know...

Thanks.

 

[yunghova35]

I'm not even gonna read anymore after

"Ok, here's the situation...
I was really liked this girl from work for a while"

NEVER stick your pen in the comapny ink, or try too.

 

[diablo]

Originally posted by yunghova35
NEVER stick your pen in the comapny ink, or try too.

This only applies to jobs that you're considering making a career out of. Obviously, if you're pulling in $5.50-8.50 an hour, you're not going to stick around there forever - have fun while you can. In corporate America, the "don't sh*t where you eat" saying holds true. Not in minimum-wage America (which is where most of us are, for the time being...)

Odds are that she either hates museums, really doesn't want to date someone from work, or just thinks of you as a friend. My guess would be on the last.

 

[dearsappho]

Why not stick your pen in the company ink? What if a girl you gamed started working for your firm etc?

 

[Royal Elite]

How about going to the museum having a good time and see what happens after that. Only God knows the future, and humans beings change emotions like they change underwear. Most people say what they wont do today, then do the thing the next day, becuase of how they are feeling that day.

Have a good time, be positive, and see what happens. By worrying you are holding on too negative energy which will ensure a bad time. No one wants to be around negative energy.

 

[ApocalypseCow2]

Go to the museum with her. Make her a friend, and use her as social proof to get numbers from other girls. If you're really lucky, she might get jealous, too

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Re: Her: "I don't want to date anyone from work", But we're still "going out" on

Originally posted by alec11

Her: "Can I ask you something? Is this a romantic thing?"
Me: (nervous laughter) "What does that mean?"
Her: "Well. I don't want to date anyone from work."
Me: (taken aback and unsure what to do) "Why not?"
Her: Blah, blah, blah... dont want my whole life to be at work, blah, blah...

Alec, Alec, Alec......

The translation of what she said in plain english is this:

"I'm not not attracted to you. However, I'd love to make a pu$$y AFC-friend out of you for some attention."

Notice how she rejected you, without actually "rejecting" you. This is a VERY common sly technique that many women employ to make a pu$$y AFC-friend out of you. How does it accomplish this?

Simple. If she flat out rejected you coldly, you'd lose all interest in her and may even be offended. BUT, if she indirectly rejects you, she can keep you as a chump of a friend who will give her all the attention she wants as you are hoping that one day she'll change her mind about not dating someone from work. Pretty smart of them huh?

That's the beauty about this site. You'll find out about these schemes that girls play and you can fight back with the knowledge you gain here. Here is the deal:

Basically, if you did not work with this girl and just knew her from say...school or did a cold approach, she'd reject you still. Remember that this has nothing to do with not wanting to date someone she works with. Do you believe if this extremely handsome and charming man she works with asked her out, she'd decline? Lol not bloody likely. He wouldn't be hearing the "not wanting to date a co-worker" excuse.

If you want to have a chance at her, you're going to have to play the "don't care" card. You're also going to have to play the jealousy card. What I mean by the "don't care" card is that you're going to have to make her WORK for the attention she wants. You're not going to freely give it out. You can accomplish this by not paying too much attention to her. Of course, don't be mean or cold to her!

The jealousy card is easy. Talk about other girls. This method has the best results if you ARE actually chasing other girls. So do it. Chase other girls. Let her know about your OTHER persuits and desires. Don't talk to her about your desires towards HER....at least not yet. You have to wait until you got her. So basically let her know how much she is missing out on because she "does not want to date someone from work".

Hope that helps.


P.S. The "not wanting to date co-workers" excuse is almost always a lie coming from a women. However, with men, we usually mean it!

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

Originally posted by dearsappho
Why not stick your pen in the company ink? What if a girl you gamed started working for your firm etc?

these usually end up in trouble for the man, lawsuits etc.

 

[ketostix]

I concur with Diablo. What TillTheEndOfTime said was interesting and something he should consider at least in the back of his mind. But this could just have been a sh!t test, kind of like a girl will say you can come over but we're not having sex..the she does it anyway LOL. I'd go with option 4, since you're interested...play along and see what happens.

 

[Anthony_Training]

social proof her..

I agree... if shes not digging you, make her your social proof to get her jealous... ingenious strategy.

Right now.. its likely she sees you as a friend I will have to say tho.