Her 1st Crying Jag....I'm Ready to Walk

MacDiddy

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Oblivious wrote:
Oh by all means be picky. I am a big advocate of not settling and getting what you want. But you also have to be realistic and know that everyone isn't perfect. I feel when you come with all these lists and stipulations, you can often miss out on some really good people. Even if you come across someone who has the looks, emotional intelligence, etc. doesn't mean she will be compatible, will like you or what have you. But don't get me wrong. I feel like if I bring alot to the table and have a lot to offer, anyone wanting to deal with me must come with the same or not at all.
Oblivious... you talk the talk... but you'll end up falling for a bad boy DJ...

So what do you bring to the table?.. A hot body, raw $exual urges, a no nagging policy or an anti-Drama queen disposition??
 

Oblivious

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I bring more to the table than those superficial things that you listed. I may end up falling for a bad boy DJ. But that won't be my end all be all. A bad boy DJ doesn't seem to be one in it for the long haul but in it for what he can get and move on. I want something more than that. I want a companion that I can be with for a lifetime, simply unconditional love. With some DJ tendancies. You guys do have it on point that no woman wants a pushover, but no woman wants some control freak either (well some deal with it, but I am sure none of them blatantly go out looking for some man to put them in their place and treat them like some child either).

No I don't have the hottest body and I am not some big freak porn star and I can't promise I won't nag or be anti-drama all the time. But I do know that I am smart, funny, kind, loving, loyal, sexual, easy going, down to earth, etc. But whomever I end up with will want me and like me for me regardless. Maybe an AFC mentality but I'd rather have it that way than to have to keep up a facade all my life
 

Oblivious

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I do know what I want and am looking for. I'm not perfect and no one on this planet is either. We are attracted to what we are attracted to. Alot of times it has no rhyme or reason to it. Yeah it may be possible that I put my guard down and get caught up with some DJ but like I said its only temporary. These techniques only get you guys so far. Thats why there are guys on here in their 30s and up, yet still single trying to find someone. Your techniques help lure in a girl but you guys don't know how to keep 'em. Who wants a guy who has to have a HOW TO guide on being a MAN. Just be one!

If I pass up good guys its because I am just not into them just like if a guy passes up a girl with potential out the wazoo. So don't try to dissect my words and try to tell me how I think and how women think. We are all different.
 

al77

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Originally posted by MacDiddy

Who wants a guy who has to have a HOW TO guide on being a MAN. Just be one!
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You make it sound as though it is so easy for any given AFC to step up to the plate and become a man... Where is his point of reference???


No women would be able to answer.
What she means by "BE A MAN" is to simple "Hey dude, shut up and follow me, do what I want...then I'll call you "a nice man"... well.. maybe".

This is the main thing in women's agenda: to play on man's identity. How would a guy know if he is a man? If a woman tell him so, then he is. Right? So if she withholds her praise and AFC starts tro crawl to her and supplicate....please.. hot p*ssy, call me a MAN, I'll do anything you want...

What a simple leash!! Most AFC are on this women's leash: they are depended on her word, they want to be validated by women's "Good boy..!.. man!" but after than usually follows "Hey .. fetch this 10k coat for me and fast!... Pleeeeeease
Dont want to? I will not call you a MAN then!"
 

Oblivious

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This site has good tips, I don't deny, for life in general like gaining confidence, getting hobbies and other interests and not let the opposite sex being your only focal point. I think men and women both can benefit from that knowledge. Its the games and the techniques that I question. Yeah they probably do work to lure someone in. But its not what keeps people around. And it seems like alot of you men and women may find themselves in a rut following these games all the time. Developing yourself as a person will do more I feel for anybody.

I don't validate a guy with if he is a man or not (except for instances of abuse or neglecting your responsibilities), but I do have qualities that I value and don't just like men have qualites in women that they value and don't. Like it was said I am a woman and don't know all it is to be a man. I am not one. I know I am trying to be the best woman I can be though and I would like a man to aim to be the best man he can be (whatever that may be). I was raised with many positive men in my life, including my father and grandfather, so I have a clue in what qualities in a MAN that I value and then there are some that I don't.

As far as dragging an AFC along cause one can, guys do the same thing. Obviously women can be total AFCs too with low self esteem, willing to do anything to be with a man. And you guys take advantage of it just like the best of them to get what you want and then NEXT the chick with the quickness.

I mean it seems like we all do the same things to each other. But I don't think its fair to lump all women in the same group just like it wouldn't be fair to lump all men in the same group. There are some trifling women in the world just like there are trifling men of this world. They do the same trifling stuff. The thing I see alot of people, especially men on this forum do is internalized stuff they've endured with select women and use it as fuel to be angry at all women and have this don't give a f**k mentality and proceed to mess over women just like you felt women messed over you. And that isn't too healthy to me. At that point you totally allow other people's actions to define who you are and define your actions rather than just being yourself. All women are evil and all men aren't--there are some that are, and if they aren't your cup of tea avoid them.
 

al77

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Originally posted by Oblivious

I don't validate a guy with if he is a man or not (except for instances of abuse or neglecting your responsibilities), but I do have qualities that I value

But I don't think its fair to lump all women in the same group just like it wouldn't be fair to lump all men in the same group.
if you are saying "just be a man" to men, you do want to validate them and use it as control: if a guy do not comply to you, he is NOT a man.
Note, what is the most important here is when poor chump asks "ok. lady, why I am not a man??" she would answer with something like "you didn't vaccum the room".

This is extremely typical control method for ALL women, yes, here I think it is ok to lump women in one group
Men don't do this kind of sh*t - ever heard a guy says "You are not a.. woman!"??? :)

I often have thta feeling: women get their supplies of thoughts from one universal women's brain. Women think alike even in very personal things, they all want to be similar...but cannot admit it.
Example: When I talk to women online I ask sometimes: what do people notice first about you personality wise?
I supposed I'd have tons of different answers....
gee... all women say the same thing, exactly the same! No difference! How would you explain that? Still "do not lump women in one group"?
 
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