Help with social status

[Luscious]

Man, you have to stop underestimating yourself.

Every single damn person you see every day can change the world and make a difference - you're just the same as everyone in that sense.

It's tough love but it's good advice.

Start small. Say hi to people. Make a list of small social victories you need to achieve each day.

You can do it with a lot of effort.

 

[Nexxus]

nothing's wrong with you

You're just very unconfident and think that you're hopeless loser geek nerdy ass freak with no life... right?

So anyway just start to look at yaself harder and say that your actually hottest animal on planet. About not talkin, really easy to talk, if your just walkin in road or corridor with someone and she has his phone on or wears something special just talk bout phone or clothing.

You have memory problems? go to a doctor to find out and I'm pretty sure that nothing is wrong with ya brain, you just don't really try hard.

Why are you ugly, hell people even come up to you and say that you look like dashiz.

Anyways friends talk behind ya back, if it was me I'd either dump them or if they good friends confront them about it and ask wassup?!?!

Your voice is deep? well my voice is HIGH like a girl's or at least used to be last year, I quit tryin to sing like Justin Timberlake and Michael Jackson and started rapping (lol kinda weird yeah) also last year I had the lisp which I no longer have now, but I learnt to actually love my voice and now I'm like singin to Mario (don't do it in public unless it goes with the situation)

quite a few good confidence tips can be found on becomeaplayer.com

BTW it is VERY EASY to make new friends, I've never lived in 1 country for more than 4 years so I should know. I've lived in S.Korea, India, Belgium,Vietnam, Kenya and Ethiopia(soon) so I know all about makin new friends. I guess I can kinda explain lol, primary years in 2 dif schools, very easy to make friends no help needed,

Then I went to highschool in kenya, the 1st year was ****, cuz I had the lisp and was like **** I GOT THE LISP I AINT NEVER GONNA MAKE FRIENDS. then I asked my mom to learn how to talk without the lisp lol so yeah now I dun have lisp no more. 2nd year people started to like me, I quit my group of small friends who never have girls around them at 1 single time and now I moved on to be with guys who go to parties every week and all. all i had to do was say hery wassup, approach and chill with them during lunch a bit, approach girls and made sure they noticed, whenever your with them you need something to say tho otherwise it'll look kinda weird for u to be there.

anyways next year I movin to Ethiopia (**** I wanted to go to european or north american country but well u know! I pretty sure that it'll all be good, especially since the ladies r supposed to be real hot down there) and I know that I'm gonna be with ladies and cool boys from the start just cuz I know that I'm good at makin friends easily...

if you have got another year of highschool left then I recommend you move to another highschool, new people, new are, new start since this year is basically over, just go out and be the man, everyone wanna meet you, hell I wanna know more about you!

 

[sinner]

a)dump your friends
b)start workin out - will make you feel more manly and confident
c)start readin (anythin) - so you can talk about more stuff to people
d)ditch insecurity and be confident.. dont take **** from anyone

Observe yourself, see where you lack and keep
improving yourself.

 

[ddddooooodddd]

Originally posted by JSH
Yeah, make it a funny comment.

wtf is that suppose to mean?

 

[solotak]

Okay guys, just to show you where I have progressed to, I have pretty much lost contact with the guys I hanged out with and now hanging out more with a mate I knew for quite sometime which is at least a start.

I'm still weary of me being "likeable" as i've notice not much of an improvement in the communication departement. And the things I think that prevent my personality to shine is my conversation skills and humor. Now before you go yelling at me that if I believe that then it'll be so, however i AM trying and making an effort but the results havn't yielded. I was even told by my mate that I had a dry sense of humour (lack of laughing) but I really am trying to feel good about myself and not to take life seriously. It's that it's hard to erase that image of me being so serious and transform myself into a fun to hang out with person. People will see me as incongruent and i know I shouldn't give a **** but it wouldn't look natural from me.

As you can see i still have some doubts but not as much as i started with. I think it ties down with humor, where that branches off to being spontaneous, creative, original and likeable. This requires an upbeat voice that's constantly having different pitches and tones at certain words and syllables. I'm trying to fine-tune my voice but i still can't get it to sound naturally enthusiastic. I'm now singing out aloud with a song to soothen my vocals so that may help a bit.

Aside that, it's just hard to constantly remain inspired and stay motivated. If anyone knows a way to have that right dj mindset you have when reading a bunch of material on this site and makes you feel good, how do you keep that feeling last throughout the next day and the remainder of the week? I'm sure if I can conquer that and always feel good about myself I can tackle this much faster than I was before.

 

[Nexxus]

oh btw just to help with why sometimes when the alpha male says something really stupid and everyone laughs but when you do it and noone laughs, well basically, it's becuz of 3 things...

1. he already has the reputation of being that type of person. and it's funnier becuz of that, you need to earn it at first, but once you got it's sooo easy to keep it.

2. because of the way that he says it. Instead of saying it in a really dull way he says it in a really exciting confident manner, also many times the way he says it he kind of sounds confused at what he's sayin to himself.

3. He knows when to say that in different situations, sometimes one situation would be better, fo example, in a group of 4. I'm like "this a new radio station, came out 2 months ago", other 2 guys "seriously" then I wait a few secs, look confused at them and like "SERIOUSLY?!?!"

so yeah I find it easy to get these 3 coordinated correctly etc. (try not to seriously disrespect anyone by that I mean you can jokingly disrespect someone)

general funninness, is somewhat similar to that alpha male cracking stupid jokes and getting the laughs, Just talk in a different way, seriously, 90% of jokes won't work without HOW you say it, smile and maybe give a few body gestures, and a few funny faces, these really help, only thing is for feneral funniness you need no reputation at all instead it's much easier and it BUILDS your reputation of being funny which will soon lead to being a funny stupid joke cracker, when I say stupid I don't mean no brain stupid I just mean funny stupid.