Help with approach "blockade"

[gg999]

Thursday afternoon, I'm going home from work. I get into a tram and spot a cute blondie, with nice long hair and cool outfit. We lock eyes for a couple of seconds, I smile, then she looks down and touches her hair. Then I FREEZE. I know what I want to do, I want to go there and say "Hi", or one of the 4 openers that pop up into my head that very moment. But I feel like I am a stone statue. I don't feel anxiety, I just can't move. After half a minute I feel like I could do it, but then "it's already too late, it would be weird now".

Girls look at me wherever I am, I am tall and I think handsome, was told that I am a very social person. Girls at work flirt with me, grab my hands etc. Yet I can't for the life of me make a move when opportunity to approach presents itself.

I searched the forums for advice on this, started reading the Eric Disco's book. I know that ultimately I just need to push myself. I just thought that maybe some of You could share something that will resonate with me/ motivate me in the time of need, or just tell me I am a ****ing idiot and stop being a *****.

Thanks in advance, and Hi, because I'm new here!

 

[firstbornunicorn]

That night she was wondering why the guy in the tram didn't go speak to her. If openers pop into your head you're not doing bad, just go do it. Even the lateness can be used as a funny opener if you must.(may come off as weak, but if you're charming you can make it work).

Not gonna lie though, if the attraction is really high my brain just stops working.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Thursday afternoon, I'm going home from work. I get into a tram and spot a cute blondie, with nice long hair and cool outfit. We lock eyes for a couple of seconds, I smile, then she looks down and touches her hair. Then I FREEZE. I know what I want to do, I want to go there and say "Hi", or one of the 4 openers that pop up into my head that very moment. But I feel like I am a stone statue. I don't feel anxiety, I just can't move. After half a minute I feel like I could do it, but then "it's already too late, it would be weird now".

Girls look at me wherever I am, I am tall and I think handsome, was told that I am a very social person. Girls at work flirt with me, grab my hands etc. Yet I can't for the life of me make a move when opportunity to approach presents itself.

I searched the forums for advice on this, started reading the Eric Disco's book. I know that ultimately I just need to push myself. I just thought that maybe some of You could share something that will resonate with me/ motivate me in the time of need, or just tell me I am a ****ing idiot and stop being a *****.

Thanks in advance, and Hi, because I'm new here!

Remember rejection is better than regret

 

[corrector]

Thursday afternoon, I'm going home from work. I get into a tram and spot a cute blondie, with nice long hair and cool outfit. We lock eyes for a couple of seconds, I smile, then she looks down and touches her hair. Then I FREEZE. I know what I want to do, I want to go there and say "Hi", or one of the 4 openers that pop up into my head that very moment. But I feel like I am a stone statue. I don't feel anxiety, I just can't move. After half a minute I feel like I could do it, but then "it's already too late, it would be weird now".

Girls look at me wherever I am, I am tall and I think handsome, was told that I am a very social person. Girls at work flirt with me, grab my hands etc. Yet I can't for the life of me make a move when opportunity to approach presents itself.

I searched the forums for advice on this, started reading the Eric Disco's book. I know that ultimately I just need to push myself. I just thought that maybe some of You could share something that will resonate with me/ motivate me in the time of need, or just tell me I am a ****ing idiot and stop being a *****.

Thanks in advance, and Hi, because I'm new here!

Something needs to slow down so you are able to be in the moment and talk to the girl.

When I was able to slow the mental process by trying something experimental, I was able to sync better, smile, or be in the moment. Your mental process may feel too fast to do an approach so you are always clicking after the fact. You need to mentally sync and be in the same wavelength so you can be in the moment with a girl rather than tense up. Pheromones worked with adjusting my mental process when I tried it out in 2011 and some parts of 2013 too.

 

[Lookatu]

I would recommend with indirect openers for beginners that have anxiety approaching or lack of experience.

In your specific situation, you could've asked her if you were riding on the right tram to get to where you needed to go.

Once you break the ice, it's up to you to observe how she responds and if she puts in any "extra's".

If she just gives you a one word quick answer with no smile or enthusiasm for example, you just say "thank you" and move on so that it looks like only a legit question and not a rejection from a proposal. There were no "extra's" here.

On the other hand, if she enthusiastically looks at you and smiles at you while giving you info and if she keeps carrying on in a long way, that is your cue to start up other conversations with her.

It's up to you to sense these "extra's" after the initial intro and keep it moving forward.

Even after a lengthy convo, if she doesn't end up giving you her number, you've already had some good practice so she did you a favor anyways. Win-Win...

The more you put yourself in these situations, the more natural and comfortable you'll get.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

You simply do it. There is really nothing to "learn". Be like Nike. Just Do It.

 

[Serenity]

You have two options, read a TON of advice without ever finding what you need or just go for it.

I know that ultimately I just need to push myself.

Yup, that's the answer! You will never find anything that resonates with you in such a way that the inevitable conclusion is any less inevitable.

This is all a matter of how patient you are really, when you grow impatient of all the unsatisfying advice you'll go for it anyways. At some point you'll have to do it and nothing can fully prepare you except for a lot of experience doing it, but the prerequisites for that is to get started doing it.

So you see, if you want to succeed at approaching you don't have a choice, you just have to do it.