HELP Please give me advice.

[Adam3335]

So there is young women (18) and me (20). We have dating each other for about 2 months and she is attracted but she giving me sort of drama last weeks. First is cancelling date on last moment ( I express that I'll don't tolerate it) but that she repeated it. HER problem is, that she is very jealous about other girls. She even say's me "goodbay" when I was chat with her sister on facebook (to which I react with fun ofcourse). But she is upset about fact, that I have too many women friends and I'm going with them on parties and they have friendship with me. Today we have phone conversation and she throwing my way every sort of complainig about that and she mentioned, that I don't call her and rather call to other women bla bla. She said that she talked about this with some "woman chasers" (I don't know how if it is ok in english) and they said that when they have girfriend that they don't go out with other women. So don't know what to do with this. I like that girl but I have other women, which I'm only friends and don't want change it.
She talks about me as about her boyfriend but we have never talked about if we are exlusive or not so I assume that we are but have feeling that she is confused. She also gave me ultimatum that if I won't change, that...

I don't know how to discuss with this girl, if I should be honest/open, becaouse I don't want argue about stupid things, but on other side I wan't talk to her. PLEASE give me some intelligent answer to this in shortest time as posslible, THANKS ALL.

 

[Caveman]

She also gave me ultimatum that if I won't change, that...

Walk away. No, RUN away from this girl! You haven't even made it clear that you two are exclusive and already she is trying to change you!

Even if you love this girl too much to walk away: She will never get off your back and you will always have to defend yourself and explain to her why you were talking to another girl.

Jealousy takes much much patience and for a girl who is so insecure that she is already trying to change you, even giving you ultimatums... just... walk away. She's got serious issues!

 

[Adam3335]

Thank you very much for your response. We were talking about 1 hour ago so I'm confused... It wasn't ultimatum in exact meaning, she don't mean it for real. She wrote me this message after the call: You already choose that you need meeting other chicks and partying all the time and you don't care if you are with me. So it's clear and so why to talk?!" - a understand that it was wroted in affect. But I personally think that she want that I'll express in some way that I like her and I don't know if this ALL thing is only a test. But when we are together it's clear that I care about her, but I don't express it by words because I'm not even sure if she feels the same. Even that everything looks that she feels. I think that she is confused and that her confusion is part of that problem too. In my opinion it won't be good if I would bring exclusivity thing but I really don't know. Thanks again for opinions and advices.

 

[Adam3335]

I never defend or explain yourself and everytime I make fun about her jealoussy or complaining issues. Maybe she feels powerless because her moods and games doesn't affect me that much and it finally goes to this poing. But I'm only thinking...

 

[Captain]

Don't take any of her crap. You need to be willing to walk away from her.

First is cancelling date on last moment ( I express that I'll don't tolerate it) but that she repeated it.

Big red flag there. After the second time, you should be dropping her. By taking her bad behaviour (staying in the relationship with her), she is losing attraction. If you leave her and start dating other women (or just give her less attention and date other women), her attraction level will start to go back up.

HER problem is, that she is very jealous about other girls. She even say's me "goodbay" when I was chat with her sister on facebook (to which I react with fun ofcourse). But she is upset about fact, that I have too many women friends and I'm going with them on parties and they have friendship with me. Today we have phone conversation and she throwing my way every sort of complainig about that and she mentioned, that I don't call her and rather call to other women bla bla. She said that she talked about this with some "woman chasers" (I don't know how if it is ok in english) and they said that when they have girfriend that they don't go out with other women. So don't know what to do with this. I like that girl but I have other women, which I'm only friends and don't want change it.

Jealousy will keep her on her toes. By hanging around with other women, you're showing high value. Keep it up, you're doing nothing wrong, especially as you are not exclusive.

She talks about me as about her boyfriend but we have never talked about if we are exlusive or not so I assume that we are but have feeling that she is confused. She also gave me ultimatum that if I won't change, that...

If you haven't talked about it, you're not exclusive. You can date other women, but you need to do it honestly and openly, and act as if it is not a big deal. She won't make a big deal out of it if you don't. Stay your ground.

I don't know how to discuss with this girl, if I should be honest/open, becaouse I don't want argue about stupid things, but on other side I wan't talk to her. PLEASE give me some intelligent answer to this in shortest time as posslible, THANKS ALL.

Go out and date another woman. Let your girlfriend know. If she gets angry, walk away, and she'll be begging for another chance in a few days.

 

[Cinamon]

I am going to give you some advice that is relevant whether you are a man or a woman. If your partner doubts your commitment or loyalty and thinks you are having an affair, or seeing other people the relationship is going downhill and quick.

There are a lot of things you can change in a person, but when someone thinks you are cheating on them, or that doubt arises even once, it will never disappear forever. Save yourself a lot of heart ache honey and just move on. You have done nothing to suggest you would go stray, dont let her treat you like a criminal x