Help on re attracting an ex girlfriend

[Zolrrak]

Hi, so i had a girlfriend for 7 years and she broke up with me, i was a beta male and now i am an alpha man, confident, i have been with some women but none make me feel as happy as when i was with her.

So, i made some stupid **** and called her and arranged a date, it went ok and seems she was interested as we had a second date, I kissed her and she is thinking about us, now i have been using most of the advice on this page and others and it has worked on many girls but seems i am not able to fully get her interested or madly obssesed with me,

Any tips on how to proceed or what to do? any input is welcome

 

[sodbuster]

She's going to have to see the change in you. She wasn't interested in the old you. Not sure how you will be able to do that without looking like a braggart. Have to take some time,but it would be doable. BUT why would you want to?

Like I've said before,"if a woman isn't smart enough to know what I am, she isn't smart enough to be the mother of my children".

 

[j0n24]

I agree its a bad idea but the fastest way for her to see you change is to take charge when she's around you.

You say you were a beta male and now your an alpha..well most alphas take charge of situations....make dates, set the time, set the place, set the time YOU want to leave, set how YOU want to act around her.

It might also help to ask her what she has been doing while you guys were broken up and then say what you've done and make her feel like she isnt worth YOUR time now.

She only went to school and partied..while you worked on yourself, got a career, made a company, started going to the gym, went on vacation, got more hobbies..ect ect..basically living life.

She would feel insecure that she didnt do shiit while you did all this stuff without her...she would feel like SHE was holding YOU back this entire time and not the other way around.

Good luck and update on what happens .

 

[Zolrrak]

On the dates we have been we talked about the time we spent apart ( 1 and a half years) and I talked about all I had done, visited and learned (i have done a lot of cool things) and she did seem kinda "stuck" on what she did before she left me.

At one point, the topic about other women came and she started bombarding me with questions on how many girls and how, but she seemed amused rather than jealous.

In any case, Sodbuster I do appreciate what you say, if she isn't smart enough to see how great I am she does not deserve me, I can't force her at all to fall for me, I can just set the stage and let it happen if it happens at all
She complained on some things that make her feel bad and guilty about the previous relationship, she once cheated on me and she had an abortion... but i say hey the past is the past and now im here just to have a good time.

I'm seeing other girls, but I don't want her to push me away this time, I want the decision to be mine.

I will keep this updated

 

[Zolrrak]

UPDATE:
Yesterday i had planned a date, there is a small coffee shop where they play movies (artsy and whatnot). I had arranged to go with her beforehand and when I called her to know where could i pick her up she said she was too tired.
A few hours later she texts me asking "Is it to late to go with you?" and i texted her that it was ok, i picked her up, went to see the movie "seul contre tous" or something like that it was a very graphic movie with a few extremely violent scenes.
She came out of the movie thrilled and we talked about the movie on the way to her home, we joked and laughed a lot till i reached her house and she told me to things, that she hopes we can do this more often and then she asked me if i wanted to go inside to the restroom or coffee, to which i denied (she complained a lot about being tired and her mom was home).

So yeah that was it, she called me back so i think it shows her interest levels are growing and she is already thinking about other dates....

tips? advices?

 

[j0n24]

what is it with guys being afraid to be sexuals with girls?

I'm not usually the one to say anything about sex but the way I see it the only reason your taking to her is becasue you want to bang her vag again....when she asks you to come in you decline........................................................................................why?!
Then you talk about her intrest level being high for another date, dude she let you into her house again that would have been easy kino/escalation and maybe if you were good an easy BJ.

I think shes going to flake on you....I would set something up tell her to meet you there at so and so time...do whatever you set up with her with lots of touching and then go for the kiss whenever you feel confident enough. iF you dont feel confident during the date wait till the end when you drop her off and go for it and that should tell you how "High," Her intrest level is with you without wasting anymore time with your X.

good luck and keep updating.

 

[Elephant]

It seemed from OP's first post that he has alreday kissed her. Ya kino/escalation would have been better but he has already got a kiss showing interest. Also, her mom was home.

 

[kingsam]

UPDATE:
Yesterday i had planned a date, there is a small coffee shop where they play movies (artsy and whatnot). I had arranged to go with her beforehand and when I called her to know where could i pick her up she said she was too tired.
A few hours later she texts me asking "Is it to late to go with you?" and i texted her that it was ok, i picked her up,

tips? advices?

she had "better plans" but they fell through so she went out with you

---------------------------------

and she did seem kinda "stuck" on what she did before she left me.

At one point, the topic about other women came and she started bombarding me with questions on how many girls and how, but she seemed amused rather than jealous.

- you used to be a wimp/beta male/choad
- her interst level with you got soo low she dumped you first time
- she will NEVER be able to get such a high interest level again (subconciously she will still remember the BAD things about you - it will subtely cloud her feelings for you forever)
----------

i was a beta male and now i am an alpha man,

no, as you wouldn't be asking this if you were

 

[drak_ool]

i was a beta male and now i am an alpha man

no you're not. If you were you would either a) not bother trying to get back with a girl that dumped you over a year ago or b) wouldn't need the advice of strangers on how to get back a girl you've called your gf for 7 years.

This is further proof you still have a long way to go on the road to Alphaness:

A few hours later she texts me asking "Is it to late to go with you?" and i texted her that it was ok
...
then she asked me if i wanted to go inside to the restroom or coffee, to which i denied

the first part is just disrespectful to you. First she tells you she's tired (probably making plans to hang out with some other dude), then she tells you she still wants to go out with you (her plans fell through) and you just go with it. She's got power over you and she knows it.

The second part, she's probably just horny (as she was getting ready to get railed by that guy) so she makes a pass at you (after all a dyck is a dyck, right?), yet you completely misread that and try to do the "nice guy" thing.

like I said, you got a long way to go.

out of curiosity, how many girls as hot, or hotter than your gf have you fvcked in the year and a half you two were apart?

 

[Serg897]

Conventional wisdom around this site dictates that its always a bad idea, and usually a futile endeavor, to try to a re-attract an ex. Once you are dumped she files you under "loser" in her mind and its hard, if not impossible, to reach previous levels of interest for you in these women.

So Im not sure why you are trying to do this. Listen to kingsam and drak_ool. Find other women.

 

[Zolrrak]

Well thanks alot for your comments and things had to go as they had to go. We dated a couple times more, she made some long term plans with me and showed me her boobs, but i knew something was off when i tried to kiss her and she just gave me a kiss in the cheek.

So we had plans this weekend and when i called her to arrange the time she told me we could not see each other for a while as she started dating someone else, i gave her a cold "fine" and hung up, i don't plan on ever talking to her again not because she started dating someone else (we kinda agreed on that and i was dating other girls too) but because she thinks she can just treat me like garbage or a backup consolation prize.

she then texted me with some "im not trying to make you angry, i'm just moving forward" çrap.

So long story short i now have the experience of trying to go back with an ex girlfriend and i know now its a big NO. I will not stand for her attitude and i wont contact her ever again. It did affect me more than i thought it would but i will be fine.

 

[DonJuan_DeRosco]

You got played i'm afraid. (ooh, rhymes).

I hope you learned the lesson this saga taught you.

 

[Zolrrak]

You got played i'm afraid. (ooh, rhymes).

I hope you learned the lesson this saga taught you.

Yeah i feel pretty dumb but she is the first and only serious relationship i have had so i have never really managed ex girlfriends and well, now I have been played but good news is that it will never happen again and that i have finally proven that my ex is a manipulative ***** like every other girl I've dated so she is no longer special for me