HELP NEEDED QUICK!!! How to reply to this txt?

Neon Owl

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My ex who I'm trying to turn into a fb but has been playing hard to get just txtd me:

her "hi you ok? x"
me "yea just having a few drinks my mate's just come over for a bit. You ok? x"
her "yea feeling better than I have last few days thanks. You got a date over? haha x"

How do I respond to this to my favour?

btw it's actually just a mate but I'm thinking I should saay something to make her wonder...
 

Masculinity

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I would leave it in ambiguity. Don't lie, but saying its just your mate is boring. I would reply with "maybe, you have some competition ;)" or something along those lines. Let us know how it goes.
 

Kbomb

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Robyn923b said:
I would leave it in ambiguity. Don't lie, but saying its just your mate is boring. I would reply with "maybe, you have some competition ;)" or something along those lines. Let us know how it goes.

" There is some competition here for my attention "
 

Neon Owl

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Ok so i replied:

"not exactly a date just a friend. Glad you're feeling better it's about time! you up to much tonight? x"

Should still give the impression I've got a girl over just not anything serious right? I think that was quite subtle :)
 

Neon Owl

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FVCK

she just replied "lol ok I'll leave you to it, enjoy your night :) x"

what do I say to keep her talking but not make out like I'm needy????
 

betheman

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Neon Owl said:
FVCK

she just replied "lol ok I'll leave you to it, enjoy your night :) x"

what do I say to keep her talking but not make out like I'm needy????
to late really, "you up to much tonight?" shouldnt have added that.
she is fishing, she is still interested, leave her alone, let her stew, if she really is interested she will contact you again
 

Starrie

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Play long game here, not short game.

In this case I think trying to keep her talking seems needy. She's left you to it, so that's it. The way to make her hampster run is to let her imagine what's going on and to seem like you don't care all that much either way, i.e. you have options, she's only one of them. The less you keep chasing her conversation/txts, the more she has to imagine.
 

Neon Owl

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But I did just say I've my friend's come round for a bit, so I could say she's left in an hour or so couldn't I? That way I still get to make her wonder and also get to keep the conversation going.

I don't want her thinking I've moved on I just want her to know I have options. If she thinks I'm onto another girl there's a good chance she'll go looking somewhere else. I know she has loads of guys on the backburner :/
 

Starrie

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I don't want her thinking I've moved on I just want her to know I have options.
But you said you want to bring her on as a FB/FWB, so you have moved on, right? If so, she needs to know that you don't care one way or another (even though you really do).

Put it this way, whether you're casually interested in a NSA relationship or desperately want her back as your GF again, the way to proceed is the same. Don't chase this conversation any further. You let her know you have things going on. She gets it. She's not coming over tonight regardless so let her stew and think about what you're doing.
 

Neon Owl

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I fvcking KNEW IT.

she just sent another txt:

"Nlow you've had a date over u do know I can never be more than friends with you now.... x"


I told you guys this would happen. How do I fix this!?!?
 

Starrie

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Neon Owl said:
I fvcking KNEW IT.

she just sent another txt:

"Nlow you've had a date over u do know I can never be more than friends with you now.... x"


I told you guys this would happen. How do I fix this!?!?
Guy, you're in an awesome position, so stop sweating. She just confirmed that what you said made her hamster squeak, so you can plod ahead on now knowing that she's at least lukewarm interested. Keep going strong. If you backtrack and say "no, no, it's not like that" or some other weak crap you'll fail.
 

Neon Owl

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Starrie said:
Guy, you're in an awesome position, so stop sweating. She just confirmed that what you said made her hamster squeak, so you can plod ahead on now knowing that she's at least lukewarm interested. Keep going strong. If you backtrack and say "no, no, it's not like that" or some other weak crap you'll fail.
It doesn't feel like an awesome position :/ feels like I fvcked up. I knew she contacted me today to try see me again but now I've probably p1ssed her off too much to consider it.
She has very low self confidence and gets very jealous of other women.
 

Neon Owl

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She just sent me this:

"Whatever nothing to do with me just stop sending me msgs saying you miss me blah blah when you've got a lass over, typical guy I should be used to it I guess"
 

Starrie

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Well d@mn man, that's different, if she msg'ed you trying to get together. Should have been clear about that. Then fvck yes assure her it's just a mate and get her over. And so far you haven't fvcked up either way. Just be cool and easygoing in your response. Aim for not-desperate and lighthearted.
 

Neon Owl

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Well thanks guys it's all fvcked now.

She turned her phone off and won't reply to me.

I should never have tried to make her jealous at the start, it was obvious she wanted to make up but I had to play little games...
 

Starrie

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FTR, you're one card left to play is not hounding her about it. Don't make a bunch of missed call notifications for her to see when she turns her phone back on. Just let it mellow for at least a few days.
 

JoeMarron

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Lol sounds like a pretty lame chick to me. I wouldnt even bother..
 

Masculinity

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betheman said:
to late really, "you up to much tonight?" shouldnt have added that.
she is fishing, she is still interested, leave her alone, let her stew, if she really is interested she will contact you again
JoeMarron said:
Lol sounds like a pretty lame chick to me. I wouldnt even bother..

Yes to these two above ^. You are outcome dependent, man. That alone is likely to kill or at best reduce her attraction for you. Act like you don't give a flying bird if she goes back to you. Even when they try to hide that they care, they are thinking about you but a good number of them just wait until you make contact so that they have the upper hand. Don't fall for the trap--give it time; she will probably contact you. And if she doesn't then find another chick.
 

Neon Owl

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I ended up winning her round by admitting I was trying to make her jealous.
Just got off the phone to her and I'm going round tomorrow evening.

Wish I 'd never come here asking for advice tbh...I had to put so much work in to get her to trust me again it's unreal...next time i'm just going to go with my gut.
 
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