Help I’m confused

[Tinashe]

Guys I need help I dnt seem to be touching the right spot with this lady , we’ve managed to go out on several dates n she been to my place several times n been to hers as well , we’ve touched n kissed only , The lady told me she’s got feeling for me bt she’s scared to mess up and that I’m a good guy n dnt deserve to be put thru her mess have convinced her either ways and she said I make it look so easy yet its difficult. Shes scared of not being enough, scared of messing up, scared of everything that has to do with relationships .now I’m confused dnt know which button to press and dnt want to come out as pushy and needy to her .she talks mre of her self or her family n I Just get to listen and ask mre questions and also relate myself with her story’s n talk abt myself bt try and balance by giving her mre room We hve a lot of fun together and lose track of time . Please help me break thru with ,wat should I do now ?

 

[Serenity]

Tell her that her fear of messing it up is messing it up, that it will be fine if she just calms down, but it will get tiresome and frustrating if she continues being so neurotic.

Don't play games on her as suggested by the guy above me, it will only magnify the problem.

Fvck with her emotions a bit by letting her know you’re a wanted man that ain’t a sure thing like she thinks you are. You ain’t scared of walking from her and you mean it

This is terrible advice, she's already insecure and afraid of messing up her chance with him. It doesn't seem like she thinks he's a sure thing at all. She's already too afraid he'll walk away, that's the problem.

 

[Tinashe]

You got a LMR speech,

Popular opinion says any girl that’s not willingly jumping onyour dlck isn’t worth the sex. I completely disagree

Most guys might confuse this as low interest and tell you she’s LJBFng you. Again I disagree

To me you failed to build enough attraction

You went full on rapport and comfort by what you’re saying. You did it backwards

Attraction > rapport > comfort > seduction

Nows not the time to relate to her. You already established that. So you failed there

What you need to do is spark attraction with freeze outs, letting her know you have options, jealousy, making yourself scarce and some negs etc

Fvck with her emotions a bit by letting her know you’re a wanted man that ain’t a sure thing like she thinks you are. You ain’t scared of walking from her and you mean it

You suggest I play around with her emotions, making her feel jealous like being seen with other chicks or posting pics with other hot girls on apps whilst at it being scarce to her .

 

[Tinashe]

[QUOTE="Grewd, post: 2514612, member: 123112

Don't play games on her as suggested by the guy above me, it will only magnify the problem.


This is terrible advice, she's already insecure and afraid of messing up her chance with him. It doesn't seem like she thinks he's a sure thing at all. She's already too afraid he'll walk away, that's the problem.

If you this is terrible advice, you haven learned a thing

Everyone’s playing the game whether they’re consciously aware or not. There’s no moral difference

Second, you’re thinking like an afc and listening to her words over her actions. You’re taking her words to mean what she is literally saying. That’s not how women communicate. He speech about not waning to ruin things is a rationalization for not enough attraction.

Any girl willing to spend time alone with you and engage in foreplay has some level of interest and comfort. He failed by not disarming the LMR wth a freeze out. It wasn’t ruining about type of friendship, she just wasn’t sure of him[/so u m
So you mean I was supposed to freeze out for a while to build enough attraction? now is there a possibility of me turning things around to my advantage

 

[Spaz]

@MidnightCity has good insight here.

Stop being a Kotex for this woman.

Women has women friends and male kotex to listen to their emotional blood letting problems.

U r there to make her feel sexy, wanted, desired, etc etc.

That's ur job.

Now go do it.

 

[Tinashe]

Sure sure thanx I’m on it

 

[Serenity]

If you this is terrible advice, you haven learned a thing

You're over generalizing and using pieces of advice in the wrong context, it seems you are the one who hasn't learned a thing.

He speech about not waning to ruin things is a rationalization for not enough attraction.

That is one fvcking dumb statement, you pulled that completely out of your áss. You could be right, but the odds are probably 4/748 or something, lol.

Second, you’re thinking like an afc and listening to her words over her actions. You’re taking her words to mean what she is literally saying.

I am nowhere near being an AFC. Actions do indeed speak louder than words, but there is a difference between fear and plain old disinterest. Also, sometimes the words actually tell the truth.

110% the game you propose he try out WILL NOT WORK ON THIS PARTICULAR CHICK!! You've misunderstood what's between the lines on this one.

 

[marmel75]

When you are making out and she is getting hot and bothered grab her hand and put it directly on your c0ck...

And if she starts in with the I'm afraid stuff whisper in her ear "I know...I'm afraid too... that once I stretch that tight little pvssy out with this long thick c0ck you wont be able to get enough of me..." And grab her hand again and put it directly on your c0ck...


If that isnt enough to get her over the hump so to speak I'd consider that she is playing games with you and is banging someone else but keeping you around for other reasons.

 

[jaymbrs]

Sounds like she’s hiding some ****ed up **** about her. Proceed with caution.

 

[Milano]

Go for what you want. Show it to her, and show her what happens if you dont get what you want from her. Dont talk about it, show it.

If she declines you advancing, you start withdrawing from her.

 

[LJBFB]

Yes. She goes to the back of the line

Then, when she comes back wondering what’s up with you and why you’re hanging out with other girls, you deny any accusations, play dumb and throw back what she said to you in her face

“Oh, I thought you liked me too but you said you wanted to just be friends”

Then she’ll probably ask you to meet and you should be able to bang if you play it right

Everything else you said was good but I wouldnt say the I thought you wanted friends thing. Too overt. Be aloof and selfish. Dont acknowledge her her needs until she does for you.

 

[Igetit!]

Guys I need help I dnt seem to be touching the right spot with this lady , we’ve managed to go out on several dates n she been to my place several times n been to hers as well , we’ve touched n kissed only , The lady told me she’s got feeling for me bt she's scared to mess up and that I'm a good guy n dnt deserve to be put through her mess...have convinced her either ways and she said I make it look so easy yet its difficult.

She called you a "good guy"....

Oh sh1t......

The LAST THING you wanna hear out of a girl you're interested in is that you're "good",or that you don't deserve "this or that".

You better start acting a-holish or like a jerk SOON,or it's likely friendzone city.

Irony is,this chick said you don't deserve to be put through "her mess"...but if you CAUSED MESS in her life,she'd likely be more interested in you.

Shes scared of not being enough, scared of messing up, scared of everything that has to do with relationships.

Hmm... So she's scared of not being enough...scared of messing up....and scared of everything that has to do with relationships.

We have a special word for that. In layman's terms,it's known as...


BULLSH!T.

Dude.....you're TURNING HER OFF. I don't know what you're doing,saying,or how you're behaving around her,but if she's afraid of hurting you,it means YOU f'ed up. One thing I do know....

You talk TOO MUCH with her. You come off as more like a therapist than a man she's sexually attracted to. You need to drop it. Just let her deal with her OWN problems.....don't try to fix it. She wants to feel chemistry when she's around you....not like she's in a therapist's office.

now I’m confused dnt know which button to press and dnt want to come out as pushy and needy to her .

Probably too late for that.

she talks mre of her self or her family n I Just get to listen and ask mre questions

So she talks about herself and her family,while you just sit there quietly and listen and ask questions.....

Yeah...you're her therapist. You need TO STOP doing that. You should be trying to look down her blouse,flirting with her,asking her out,telling her what type of outfits you'd like to see her in.....not discussing her problems and issues.

Please help me break thru with ,wat should I do now ?

To be honest,it's probably already too late. I suppose you can still try,though.

Stop listening to her problems,dude. ACT LIKE A MAN WHO'S SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO HER. Don't try to fix any problems in her life. You'd get farther ADDING TO her problems than listening to her talk about them.

 

[Tinashe]

Thanks I really appreciate, got a clear insight of which type of game I shud play . Been too reluctant not goin an extra mile bt with wat you guys have shared n learn form the forum I will definitely up my game , if Its 2 late for this girl e next I will mke sure I nail it rock hard

 

[marmel75]

Thanks I really appreciate, got a clear insight of which type of game I shud play . Been too reluctant not goin an extra mile bt with wat you guys have shared I will definitely up my game

You shouldnt play any "game" that's the whole problem. You need to get to a point where things become natural and you just do, there is no thinking involved. You need to be congruent at all times.

 

[Tinashe]

I hve to gain mre confidence through practice

 

[The Duke]

OP- if you have done your job building attraction and seducing her then this chic isn't that into you or has some bonding issues.