Hello Miss One-itis!

[Desdinova]

I'm sitting here listening to "Horny SOB" by Danger Danger (what a kick ass album!) reflecting on the weekend.

While out and about on Sunday, I saw the first GF I ever had. I dated her for six months and suffered a thee year case of one-itis afterward. BOOM! I am focusses on her, and I follow her and her bf through the store. My mind doesn't even register that this is weird, because I don't care what anybody thinks. I just gotta fvcking look at that for a little longer! She still looks pretty damn good after 14 years. If I had my digital camera on me, I would have snapped a pic to preserve the moment.

She didn't recognize me. Many people who I went to high school with don't recognize me. The way I look now is a far cry from my AFC days.

It's times like this when I'm tempted to approach, chat her up, show her the sexy, confident Don Juan that I've become, attract her to me, and number close. A few years ago I took advantage of a "second chance" I got 7 years later, and it felt fantastic!

But I didn't approach. After all, she was with her bf (yes, I'm certain he was her bf) and I'm happy in my LTR. The unfortunate thing is she's been stuck in my mind since Sunday.

That fvcking three year long One-itis really did a number on me, and it's been a decade since I got over it, moved on, and swore that I would never again dwell so long on a woman I was no longer dating (and I've kept my word on that).

I guess this 5hit doesn't completely go away. It's kinda like a self-inflicted wound with a remaining scar that reminds you of your stupidity.

 

[KontrollerX]

Well that and attachment is a natural part of being a human being.

I guess those of us who get such severe oneitis just have the type of brain that has a broken attachment mechanism that doesn't allow us to let go as easy as other people.

 

[realsmoothie]

Hey, man... I still have a lingering obsession with a girl I never even KISSED. She's not around anymore (different city), but when I get the occasional call or email from her, my heart skips a beat or two.

She was the only woman to drive me to prescription antidepressants. I am so thankful that time is over...

...oneitis sucks.

 

[cordoncordon]

Be careful.

 

[PowertripII]

There is one chick that I went to HS with.. didn't see her for years and then she popped back up a few years ago. She is, by anyone's definition, a 10 (tall, model) who is one of the most down-to-earth individuals I know.

Being a completely changed individual, I decided to go for it one night. I was wildly successful- she was very responsive, hung out with me all night and gave me a ride back to my car.. Got her number (nay, she begged me to take it) and I planned on calling her in a couple of days to continue the adventure.

Went out by myself the next night and unintentionally ended up making out with her best friend right in front of her. :kick: It's been a year or two since then and while I still see her all the time we rarely speak... funny how one night and one bad decision can kick a train completely off it's tracks. I'm pretty sure I'd be with her today had it not happened- I just ended up pigeon-holing myself into the 'man *****' category.

But that being said, if you've got one-itis the only way to solve it is to approach the 'demon' head-on and see what happens. Good or bad, at least you'll know.

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo Des,


We ALL have a Miss ONEITIS. Some of us I'm sorry to say, have MORE than one! lol

But yeah, as has been said, we as human beings were designed to form emotional attachments. I believe it was a God-given bonding mechanism that was put in place to spare us the pains and sorrows of broken hearts, homes, and families. How? By making us WANT to stay together.

But alas, the sins and influences of living in this world still continue taking it's toll on us. I already know that many disagree with my take on this, and I respect their opinions, but I feel that we would have all been better off if we could have somehow actually "gotten it right" with the first girl we ever had sex with.

But, unfortunately, during this time in our culture, that almost NEVER happens anymore. Now the very society itself is seems to be against committment and the very idea of manogamy. Everything you see promotes unbridled sexuality, consequential indifference, and rampant irresponsibility

Being a freak, hoe, pimp, player, or heartless jerk is celebrated by all forms of pop culture and mass media. And the women's POSITIVE responses to these type of characteristics in men seals the deal----NO ONE can argue with the success rate that these types have at TEMPORARILY bagging the finest women. Yes, sad but true.

So in closing, it seems like the best we're left with is guarding, controlling, and protecting our EMOTIONS until that day comes when we meet somebody worthy of letting them "get a peek" at who we really are on the inside.



And you mentioned you're in an LTR...so if you've found a GOOD one for a chance, Bruh----I am SO jealous! lol




March On.

 

[Bonhomme]

God, I could just imagine what it would be like to meet my first one-itis (who I never even really dated). I'd probably not recognize her. But she might recognize me, 'cause my face hasn't changed all that much, though overall I look way better (formerly way too skinny).

 

[MacAvoy]

While out and about on Sunday, I saw the first GF I ever had. I dated her for six months and suffered a thee year case of one-itis afterward. BOOM! I am focusses on her, and I follow her and her bf through the store. My mind doesn't even register that this is weird, because I don't care what anybody thinks. I just gotta fvcking look at that for a little longer! She still looks pretty damn good after 14 years. If I had my digital camera on me, I would have snapped a pic to preserve the moment.
That fvcking three year long One-itis really did a number on me, and it's been a decade since I got over it, moved on, and swore that I would never again dwell so long on a woman I was no longer dating (and I've kept my word on that).

I guess this 5hit doesn't completely go away. It's kinda like a self-inflicted wound with a remaining scar that reminds you of your stupidity.

Do you not see how unhealthy this is? You were stalking a girl in a mall that you dated 14 years ago.

Imagine how you would have acted if her b/f wasn't there. You would have probably been picking at that scar as you called it to make it bleed again. Lucky for you this was a one-off and not likely to be repeated.

I know your far from AFC these days with all the new women you meet but for some reason, we are unable to totally set ourselves free from our one-itis. Its like we'll always want that even though we now have the education to realize we were making all the wrong moves back then.

 

[NewMan]

I saw the first GF I ever had

The first woman that ever meant anything to you, will always ptobably hold a special place with you. This is unavoidable in my opinion. Part if it is the feelings you had with this person for the first time in your life. That feeling of love - that no matter what, you can never quite get back - and the more women you go through, the more numb you become.

Deep down I still have feelings for the first woman I ever loved. I saw her recently, and we went out for drinks and caught up. After that night, I realized how far I've moved on - and how much better I am now. I will still give her my time when she calls, but she's the only ex I will ex do this with.