HB's history includes rape...

[dietzcoi]

All you guys who want to play the white knight, good for you... but you are asking to put yourself voluntarily into a situation you could avoid.

These women will often have problems. Don't let some false sense of chivalry lure you into becoming a chump...

Dietzcoi

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by Ice Cold
Cesare: How many raped women have u been with?


Nah... just to much stuff to deal with.

Ice cold is lying to you PRL - he lives in Toronto and last I looked out the weather was a complete nightmare.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Originally posted by Wyldfire
You misunderstood the point I was making. Based on the girls I've heard you talk about being interested in it sounds like you are subconsciously attracted to women who have been abused in one way or another. This is very common but it's not something men do consciously.

There is something about a girl who has been abused that attracts you. It might be a good idea for you to pay closer attention to the similarities between the girls you go for and see if you can identify what that trait is.

The difference between a victim and a survivor all comes down to attitude. A victim lets past abuse control their present life, current relationships and behavior. A survivor puts it behind them and moves forward.

After reading this post I can only say that I am guilty of misjudgement about you because that's some pretty astute sh*t, I think you are on to something.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Don Juanabbe
After reading this post I can only say that I am guilty of misjudgement about you because that's some pretty astute sh*t, I think you are on to something.

Well...you aren't alone. Many here misjudge me. Unfortunately, more often than not I end up spending my time here defending myself rather than making posts like the ones I made in this thread. It's really too bad because I have quite a bit of wisdom regarding human behavior and how people relate to one another. It would be much easier for me to be an asset to this site if everyone would just forget that I'm a woman.

 

[thefonz]

Make sure it's not a sympathy technique...

I once when out with a girl who told me her last boyfriend use hit her on a regular basis. She was very insecure so i believed it made sense that it happened to her......a few months after we ended my friend came up to me at the gym and said "Did you hear Shayla got back with her old boyfriend?" "The one who beat the **** out of her?" I said......He gave me the weirdest look, "You mean John?" "Yeah"....he tells me, "BS dude, i grew up with that kid, he's a wicked passive, never even been in fight as far as i know and when he's drunk and you punch him he just cowers and tucks....she was playing with you."

I never gave her sympathy for it but it's just one of those things i learned girls use to give them the image of the "trampled flower"...well flowers grow out of **** honey!

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by thefonz
Make sure it's not a sympathy technique...

I once when out with a girl who told me her last boyfriend use hit her on a regular basis. She was very insecure so i believed it made sense that it happened to her......a few months after we ended my friend came up to me at the gym and said "Did you hear Shayla got back with her old boyfriend?" "The one who beat the **** out of her?" I said......He gave me the weirdest look, "You mean John?" "Yeah"....he tells me, "BS dude, i grew up with that kid, he's a wicked passive, never even been in fight as far as i know and when he's drunk and you punch him he just cowers and tucks....she was playing with you."

I never gave her sympathy for it but it's just one of those things i learned girls use to give them the image of the "trampled flower"...well flowers grow out of **** honey!

I don't claim to know if the girl you're speaking of was hit by that guy or not...but I will tell you this:

My ex husband was one of the worst wimps when it came to conflict with other men. He would back down, was not at all aggressive or assertive with men. Even my own family were shocked to learn that he beat the crap out of me. Just because a guy appears to be a wus and non-confrontational, it doesn't mean he doesn't hit women.

 

[baracus]

I wouldn't get involved with someone that's been raped only because if and when the time comes that I have to slap her around for something stupid she's done, I don't want her to be too quick calling the cops.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by baracus
I wouldn't get involved with someone that's been raped only because if and when the time comes that I have to slap her around for something stupid she's done, I don't want her to be too quick calling the cops.

 

[Cesare Cardinali]

Ice cold wrote:

Cesare: How many raped women have u been with?

hahaha....not that many dude. Two that I know of. Also, I know a few chicks as friends that have been "sexually abused" as children. Not sure if that includes rape or not, and I didn't ask. The point is that some of these chicks were "f*cked up" and others were not. And certainly, the messed up ones were no more messed up than some regular (non raped) women. My point is that using that as a judgement to dump is girl is pathetic. I'm not suggesting ignoring it and blindly marrying her. I'm suggesting evaluating her as a person, not by what she has confided in you.

Cesare Cardinali

 

[ImmortalDragon]

I think we should be discussing woman raping us instead of woman being raped.

 

[Ragin_Asian]

One thing that got me f*cked up was that I couldn't call on her on her bull**** becuase I was scared I mite hurt as she was already fragile because of her ordeal. But if it was any other girl then its different.

 

[B9]

As a rule, stay away from women with issues. it will NOT get better.

Rape victims will most likely have heavy issues. Not neccesarily so won't say it is a definite red flag, but a very big yellow one to my mind.

As for being sympathetic and wanting to help her out, that is all fine and dandy but being in a relationship with her is NOT the way to do it.