HB8 coming over to watch movie

[Harry Wilmington]

Just a random question: do guys just forget what a girl that's interested in them ACTUALLY looks like???

No, really, I'd like to know. This girl is clearly showing signs of disinterest, yet it's almost as if pyros here is letting his ego convince him otherwise.

Look, I'll make it easy for you:

1. Interested girls don't show up late for dates, especially if she knows it's going to be an issue for you;

2. Interested girls don't start arguments with you every time you see them;

3. Interested girls will make out with you and - wait for it, wait for it - have sex with you because they WANT to, without much convincing;

4. Interested girls will text you/call you back w/o leaving you hanging days at a time;

5. Interested girls don't talk to you about other guys they'll be hanging out with;

6. Interested girls don't try to string you along on group dates with said other guys;

7. Interested girls ask you if you're in the same club as them and then ACTIVELY SEEK YOU OUT.

Bottom line: she's not showing signs of interest because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED. I don't say this to be harsh; I say it because I've been in your shoes and dealt with this kind of chick. A girl that likes you isn't this wishy-washy and flaky. There ARE girls out there who will actually SHOW you signs of interest.

You going NC will just give her time to go out with a guy she REALLY wants to be with, so by all means do her that favor. In the meantime, chase other girls who will prove they WANT to be around you, and stop chasing this chick around.

 

[pyros]

Just a random question: do guys just forget what a girl that's interested in them ACTUALLY looks like???

No, really, I'd like to know. This girl is clearly showing signs of disinterest, yet it's almost as if pyros here is letting his ego convince him otherwise.

Look, I'll make it easy for you:

1. Interested girls don't show up late for dates, especially if she knows it's going to be an issue for you;

2. Interested girls don't start arguments with you every time you see them;

3. Interested girls will make out with you and - wait for it, wait for it - have sex with you because they WANT to, without much convincing;

4. Interested girls will text you/call you back w/o leaving you hanging days at a time;

5. Interested girls don't talk to you about other guys they'll be hanging out with;

6. Interested girls don't try to string you along on group dates with said other guys;

7. Interested girls ask you if you're in the same club as them and then ACTIVELY SEEK YOU OUT.

Bottom line: she's not showing signs of interest because SHE'S NOT INTERESTED. I don't say this to be harsh; I say it because I've been in your shoes and dealt with this kind of chick. A girl that likes you isn't this wishy-washy and flaky. There ARE girls out there who will actually SHOW you signs of interest.

You going NC will just give her time to go out with a guy she REALLY wants to be with, so by all means do her that favor. In the meantime, chase other girls who will prove they WANT to be around you, and stop chasing this chick around.

I think it is not if she has hight interest good, if she has little then NExt.

As I said, I think it was going fine till the last date (total fail). She started with little interest, then it went up, and after the last date it went down.
Until that moment she suggested to meet the second date.
She started the made out with me the third date.
She texted me first.

Now it is just twisted so Im gonna see if I can fix it by arranging another date. Thats all.

P.S.
see this. So many guys here told me that if she's late for 10-15 mins everytime it is fine, and that I should take it good if I want to **** her.
But you say that if a girl is many times late its just a sign of disinterest. Weird.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

see this. So many guys here told me that if she's late for 10-15 mins everytime it is fine, and that I should take it good if I want to **** her.
But you say that if a girl is many times late its just a sign of disinterest. Weird.

Being late is disrespectful. It's a show on her end that her time is more important than yours is.

You have to look at it from a different perspective. Let's say her favorite Hollywood crush is in town. He sees her, walks over to her, and says "Hey, so and so, I think you're really cute. I have to shoot a movie here in town tomorrow, but would love to meet up with you from 2 to 3 for lunch, can you make it? By the way, this is the only time I have to meet up, so please be on time, ok? See ya tomorrow!"

Ask yourself this question: what are the odds that she would be on time for this lunch meeting? Better question: what are the odds she would be there EARLY for this lunch meeting?

That's what happens when a girl has high interest - they don't want to do anything to piss the guy off, so they stay in line and do things that will make them happy, like showing up on time for dates and being respectful of dude's time. Even if she IS interested in you, it's still a sign of disrespect, which is unacceptable.

Also:

As I said, I think it was going fine till the last date (total fail). She started with little interest, then it went up, and after the last date it went down.

It doesn't matter when the interest went down; the point is, it did, it's gone, and once a woman has lost interest, trying to get her back is pointless. She may physically come back to you because she doesn't have better options, but that doesn't mean she actually wants to be with YOU. Like I said, man, better to get a girl that wants to be with you vs. one who is keeping you in "maybe" land to stroke her ego.

 

[DonJuanabe]

"It doesn't matter when the interest went down; the point is, it did, it's gone, and once a woman has lost interest, trying to get her back is pointless."

As a general rule this is so true. Think of it like this: when she was initially attracted to you it was predominantly simply because she was - those chemical were in her brain doing what they do. Now that she isn't, you're trying to force the attraction, trying to force those chemicals into being. It doesn't work that way.

Sucks, but it's reality.

 

[pyros]

This isn't about nexting a girl who acts sh*tty.. anyone can do that.

This thread is serving a bigger purpose now than getting pyros laid. It's about teaching him how to control his emotions when he's around women and getting him to change his mindset.

He needs practice with this girl or he will just end up repeating the same mistakes with the next girl and the next girl after that.

They've made out several times, and she's come over to his house. He could have f*cked her date #5 if he had just kept his cool and got her a little tipsy.

Pyros, go ahead and text or call her in a day or two to try to set up a date. Preferably something like a park or your house where you can fvck her or at least try to make out with her. If she doesn't answer or call you back, you'll need to keep hitting on hot girls and start practicing everything i told you with the next one.

hi Brad.

i was thinking either going to roller blade at night, or to the beach, or to dance salsa (we've been three times)

Good?

 

[pdx1138]

pyros, just go for it man.

I would have said next, but reading further and Bradd's suggestion of practice, why not just keep it going.

You should be hunting for other options now as well, so if this doesn't work out you have a backup plan.

Always have a backup plan.

 

[DonJuanabe]

There is only one emotion that a girl should see from you: happiness. That is pretty much it. Not anger, not turmoil, not grief, not confusion, not whatever. Just happiness. Because that is what women crave - to be happy.

Now, for you to be happy when it comes to women you need to internalize and accept their behavior. It is what it is regardless of whether you did something good or bad with respect to their behavior. Accept it as it is. Do not let it get to you and interfere with your being happy. A man who is happy regardless of women is very attractive to women.

So, in your case, whether she accepts a date or not, whether she is behaving positively or negatively on said date, just be happy. She is or isn't right for you and you'll find out which it is in time -- if she is right for you be happy cuz that rocks; if she isn't right for you be happy because you know not to waste time and energy with the b*tch. Unfortunately, it appears that she isn't right for you and that you are wasting time and energy with the b*tch. And you certainly don't come across as being happy. You sound anxious and frustrated. Gee, wonder if she has something to do with that.

 

[Sandow]

Pyros, I can't stress how important this is. Spinning plates is at the core center of the DJ philosophy, it's what gives us the "i don't give a fvck" attitude that women find so irresistible.

Braddd80, you're advice is spot on here, but it's conflicting to what you're saying to Pyros. How is he going to have this mentality if you keep recommending to chase and contact her? Being a DJ isn't just about getting laid, it's about being a man with self-respect.

Pyros, I sure hope this gal is the greatest thing next to heaven (HB15!) cause you're spending a whole lot of effort on someone that keeps disrespecting you like this. You don't owe this broad anything.

 

[pyros]

There is only one emotion that a girl should see from you: happiness. That is pretty much it. Not anger, not turmoil, not grief, not confusion, not whatever. Just happiness. Because that is what women crave - to be happy.

Now, for you to be happy when it comes to women you need to internalize and accept their behavior. It is what it is regardless of whether you did something good or bad with respect to their behavior. Accept it as it is. Do not let it get to you and interfere with your being happy. A man who is happy regardless of women is very attractive to women.

So, in your case, whether she accepts a date or not, whether she is behaving positively or negatively on said date, just be happy. She is or isn't right for you and you'll find out which it is in time -- if she is right for you be happy cuz that rocks; if she isn't right for you be happy because you know not to waste time and energy with the b*tch. Unfortunately, it appears that she isn't right for you and that you are wasting time and energy with the b*tch. And you certainly don't come across as being happy. You sound anxious and frustrated. Gee, wonder if she has something to do with that.

The thing is, since I dumped my ex 1 year ago I've tried to get a girl to bang her but its been like this:

girl 1) I met her several years ago. Girl is pretty hot but from another city. She came to visit a friend. We met, we made out two times and she came back home. If she had stayed longer, we would have end up banging, because we click very good.
girl 2) Foreigner I met in a club. We made out two times. Then she went to see her ex bf from my country. I tried to set up another date but she was busy with this guy. She came back home.
girl 3) Nice body, not very nice face. We made out once. Im not very attracted so I did not call her again.
girl 4) this one. Pretty hot. Five dates...last one a fail... I wanna bang her goddammit!

Two or three girls in between I met, got their number and nothing else happened.
Im not frustrated just a bit tired of trying. I have hobbies, I have friends...I do not like my job very much but ok, cant change job right now.


Thats pretty much it.

 

[marmel75]

Seems to me like this girl is toying with you doing things she knows are going to get you upset because its like a shot of adrenaline for her to give her some emotional stimulation, and you seem to be feeding right into it.

If your goal is banging this chick why are you stressing her so hard over stuff? She isn't your girlfriend or wife, she is some random chick you just met and would have already banged if she was that interested in you.

Then you go and screw it up by creating more drama for her to feed into by starting an argument as soon as she gets to your house. Notice how she didn't apologize but kept it going by criticizing your house.

To me it seems this girl has you in the palm of her hand emotionally, she knows it, and is using you to give her an emotional shot of adrenaline. When you stop providing that she is going to be gone, so either way I think you are screwed here. Your chance has come and gone with this one.

 

[Sandow]

I think I've already exhausted my point, so I won't continue beating it to the ground.

This all comes down to spinning your plates. If you were doing that, this wouldn't be an issue. Clearly she is, hence why she is so unpredictable and keeps hanging out with her guy "friends." She may get back to you, but only on her watch, when she possibly has the time.

Bradd80: good points and I agree with you. Everyone has their own sense of self-respect. Some may put up with a lot, whereas others don't put up with shyt period. I think somewhere in the middle is a good place to be.

BTW Pyros, next time, use jealousy as a tool when creating attraction. I don't believe I read anywhere that you ever made her jealous or showed that your time was valuable. It appeared that you were way too available. Being too available will dry a girls panties faster than a quick dry cement truck.

 

[pyros]

I think I've already exhausted my point, so I won't continue beating it to the ground.

This all comes down to spinning your plates. If you were doing that, this wouldn't be an issue. Clearly she is, hence why she is so unpredictable and keeps hanging out with her guy "friends." She may get back to you, but only on her watch, when she possibly has the time.

Bradd80: good points and I agree with you. Everyone has their own sense of self-respect. Some may put up with a lot, whereas others don't put up with shyt period. I think somewhere in the middle is a good place to be.

BTW Pyros, next time, use jealousy as a tool when creating attraction. I don't believe I read anywhere that you ever made her jealous or showed that your time was valuable. It appeared that you were way too available. Being too available will dry a girls panties faster than a quick dry cement truck.

well, the fourth date she said that she was free from 19h to 20:30h so I said: well, we'll meet some other time because Im meeting someone at 21h'
her: oh you're meeting someone...
me: yes.
her: well, tomorrow Im meeting some friends at X club, just join us.
me: with some friends of yours? uhmm Ill think about it ok?


Then, next day I said that we could go to the beach and then meet her friends afterwards to what she replied:
oh, I've already made plans, you should ask me out not at the last minute, anyway, we can go to this club we two, my friends are not probably going :*

So we did.
Last sunday, next day after the fail date she texted me to say that she was gonna be at X pub with a male friend in the afternoon, to what I replied: 'Im with a female friend of mine so I dont know, we¡ll see.'
her: oh ok have fun.
me: you too!


Ill contact her today and we'll see.

 

[cordoncordon]

This has to be the longest and most over analyzed thread in SS history considering its in regards to two people who don't really seem to like each other and who is causing OP a large amount of stress and anxiety. Both of you are game playing just to "win". You to exert your dominance and to show you are not an AFC (along with getting laid), and her by just trying to show she can control you. Neither of you it sounds like gets any real pleasure out of actually being with the other.

Just move on OP. Learn from this and move on.

 

[Kbomb]

Pyros, it's ok man. you can let her go now. It's not working. Talk to different girls, get out there.

I just don't think he understands fully, but neither did I at some point, even when it was sitting on my face.

 

[pyros]

hi.

I texted her how she was doing, and if she found a flat already (she needs to find a new one, cause she has to move out.)
She said: Im weighed down by all my things, what about you?
me: good I just went to this cool restaurant blah blah, how is your dancing lessons going?
- no reply -

Same pattern than last monday.
The thing is she read my message in whatsapp, and many hours have passed but she hasnt used whatsapp yet (you can see when is the last time someone used it)


Im not doing anything else with this chick. I know she has some problems going on but...anyway....

 

[marmel75]

hi.

I texted her how she was doing, and if she found a flat already (she needs to find a new one, cause she has to move out.)
She said: Im weighed down by all my things, what about you?
me: good I just went to this cool restaurant blah blah, how is your dancing lessons going?
- no reply -

Same pattern than last monday.
The thing is she read my message in whatsapp, and many hours have passed but she hasnt used whatsapp yet (you can see when is the last time someone used it)


Im not doing anything else with this chick. I know she has some problems going on but...anyway....

Took long enough to get to this point

 

[pyros]

Hi.

So let's say what are the lessons learnt:

1- The fail fifth date...she came by bike... should I have picked her up at her place instead?

2- When she arrived late, I should have just said something like:
'you should set your watch 15 mins earlier so you'd be on time, dont you think?'
I should have not said anything else, and if this happens in future dates I will just arrive 15-20 mins late as well until I bang the girl, and then i'll see if this bothers me or not.

3- After this date, she texted me in the morning to chitchat a bit and then she said she was gonna be at X club with a male friend of hers and that I should join them at night...
I went there with some friends, I texted her to see if she was there, she asked me the same thing...and nothing else happened.
Should I have done something different?




Anything else?

Thanks.

 

[IronDJ]

hi.

I texted her how she was doing, and if she found a flat already (she needs to find a new one, cause she has to move out.)
She said: Im weighed down by all my things, what about you?
me: good I just went to this cool restaurant blah blah, how is your dancing lessons going?
- no reply -

Same pattern than last monday.
The thing is she read my message in whatsapp, and many hours have passed but she hasnt used whatsapp yet (you can see when is the last time someone used it)


Im not doing anything else with this chick. I know she has some problems going on but...anyway....

Why didn't you take Brad's advice and call?

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Why didn't you take Brad's advice and call?

Because it wouldn't have made a difference.

Too many people on this board think there is a paramount difference between calling vs texting and the reality is in our time texting and social media are the preferred forms of communication across the board.

It was CRYSTAL CLEAR that this girl has very low to no interest in Pyros, but he chose to ignore us and continue the self torture and over-analysis.

Lets get some things out of the way:

1) Making out with a girl doesn't mean anything... seriously; unless you are stabbing her guts, a make out doesn't mean she likes you.

2) I'm all about confidently persisting, but learn the difference between when to persist and when to walk away. You should've walked away a long time ago.

3) You can't INCREASE interest in a girl by calling her out, scolding her etc when she has little to no interest in you.



Learn from your mistakes and move on to the next girl.


Brad I like you homie, but I gotta call you out here; I know you are just trying to help newbies understand and get better, but this was a dead end a while ago, I'm pretty surprised you didn't see that.







PIMP

 

[Sandow]

God pyros, it pains me to read your FR's.

Dude, you just need to chill out a bit. You seem way too uptight. Like Pimp-sicle said, you're scolding a girl that has very little interest in you.

Lastly, I don't see any sense of humor or charm in your game. You badly need to work on this. Every interaction with this girl sounds so stagnate and awkward.