Having a hard time to reach climax during sex

BannedGod

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O.K. so I haven't been sexually active for very long now (I'm 23), now I started sweeing a girl to whom I'm quite attracted, and we get along quite well and so far sex with her is great and happens often and every time I see her. However, I find myself having a hard time cumming. I've only been seeing her for three weeks now so I got with her four times, but I haven't been able to *** yet.

My hypothesis is that I've spent so much time masturbating, always with the same grip strength, ryhtm, speed, etc. (always hard and as fast as possible) that I guess I've conditioned myself to that sort of stimulation. I have had sex with other girls in the past and din't have that problem, although the other girls in the past were without condoms, this one I'm using one.

Since I got with her I reduced the frequency at which I masturbate to about 2x per week, and now I'll switch over my style to keep my grip not too strong and all, but other than that, have you guys already experienced such problems, and do you have any other recommendations?
 

Mike32ct

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It's normal after a dry spell. Your body is conditioned to respond more to your hand than a female. Plus after being away from sex for a while, it's normal to be a little uptight and unable to go over the top.

Cutting out or cutting back masturbation is good. No porn either.

I wound give it time. I can't "finish" with a new partner until like the 5th time together or so.

You can also change to a thinner condom (if you're using them) for more sensation. D u r e x Ext ra Se n sit ive is pretty good.
 

BannedGod

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Mike32ct said:
It's normal after a dry spell. Your body is conditioned to respond more to your hand than a female. Plus after being away from sex for a while, it's normal to be a little uptight and unable to go over the top.

Cutting out or cutting back masturbation is good. No porn either.

I wound give it time. I can't "finish" with a new partner until like the 5th time together or so.

You can also change to a thinner condom (if you're using them) for more sensation. D u r e x Ext ra Se n sit ive is pretty good.
Lol I hadn't thought of extra thin condoms... But my issue with condoms is that I am quite large (average lenght but larger than average) so I need to go in the larger size, do they still make them in thinner versions?
 

spiegel549

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Mike32ct said:
Don't know. Never bought the large ones before lol.

LOL!!!! Made my night..

They do make the larger sizes in thin. CVS should have them.
 

Do not be too easy. If you are too easy to get, she will not want you. If you are too easy to keep, she will lose interest in you. If you are too easy to control, she will not respect you.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Zerro

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BannedGod said:
My hypothesis is that I've spent so much time masturbating, always with the same grip strength, ryhtm, speed, etc. (always hard and as fast as possible) that I guess I've conditioned myself to that sort of stimulation. I have had sex with other girls in the past and din't have that problem, although the other girls in the past were without condoms, this one I'm using one.
Just like with women sometimes men can have difficulty if the rhythm, pressure, etc are not quite right. Even after several months with the same girl there are nights where something's off and it takes more effort to keep from falling back down the slope just when the climax is approaching.

A thinner condom can definitely help. The times I've had to fall back to a regular-thickness one always resulted in situations of "why is this taking forever?"
 

zinc4

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For me...it's much easier to climax when the partner is new because it is more fresh and exciting...but more difficult during a LTR...however, one thing that helps is extreme dirty talking during sex or watching a good porn flick together while fore playing and having sex...a lot of this stuff is just mental.
 

Ethernal

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Extra thin? Seriously, be careful with that, might be only me, but the condom always rips, I'm forced to use extra safe...
 

Duracell_Bunny

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I used to have this problem. It felt like left-handed masturbation.

Happened with my ex, than another girl I was dating after the break up.

Went on a two week holiday with the lads, didn't score and always too hungover to let one go in the shower.

You could imagine the size of my balls when I got back. Next time I slept with this girl I was dating, hey presto! - Stayed off jerking completely and only had sex with her, it worked for me.

Another one that worked, I couldn't cvm when doing her from behind, so a couple of hours before she came over I would knock myself off just up to the point of climax (to the point where you would only last a few seconds).
 

Packers2010

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well.. the last girl i was with. it was my first time. so it took me like 2 times. then the flood gates opened.

and i was like 20 at the time. nearly 21. just depends who it's with though i mean. i was in love with her so. it could have been that rather then the physical side.

but who knows. it could just be her. maybe she sucks in bed.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Mr. Bond

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I've had this issue too. Generally everything mentioned so far has been good advice. There are several factors that can lead to this happening. If possible, I'd experiment with them one at a time. I know I'd rather bang a girl for a half hour or an hour straight in a bunch of different positions (and eventually nut) than only be able to last 5 minutes.

I use large size condoms too. There aren't that many options for us. Magnum Thin seemed to work better than regular Magnums, which are thick as hell. If you're using Magnum XL (more comfortable), your options are really limited. I haven't seen any fancy styles of this size in the store. Unfortunately, I've never been able to cvm with a condom on.

As mentioned, jerking it has an effect on this problem too. Do it less....once a week, maybe even less if you're still having trouble.

And here's the big one for me - medication. I've been on antidepressants for years. It's great to be able to jackhammer a girl forever, but it also makes cvmming much more difficult. If you're taking any medication, check out the possible side effects to see if they mention any sexual dysfunction.

Hopefully you learn to balance lasting a long time while keeping the ability to cvm. If you can do that, girls will keep coming back for more. :up:
 
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