Have you ever received a heartfelt apology from a woman?

[CyrusTheGreat]

I have come to notice that I haven't really received a heartfelt apology from a woman, even when she clearly misbehaved or was wrong.

Example: a girl is late on a date (10 mins or so, otherwise I'll probably leave), I explain why that is inappropriate and that she should have let me know in advance that she was going to be late. The best they do is to say OK I'll tell you next time, without saying "sorry". Even if they say "sorry", it's so fake.

What has your experience been? If your experience is similar why do you think that is? Why women cannot apologise?

 

[BillyPilgrim]

One time I did from my Mom when she accidentally slammed the car door on my thumb when I was 7. Off the top of my head, that's about it.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Yes. Once.

 

[Gamisch]

Women will only apologize when shyte really hits the fan. Mostly after the damage is irreversible.

 

[The Duke]

Women will only apologize when shyte really hits the fan. Mostly after the damage is irreversible.

Yep, once they realize they have lost something and start feeling vulnerable the apology might come out. It took my ex-wife 5yrs and counseling to finally apologize for cheating on me and it came right before the "I want to get back with you". Silly girls.

I've always said most of them lack self awareness and forget how they affect others. It's always how you affect them. Attractive women by default are somewhat self absorbed and insecure.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

No

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Yes. Once.

When was that?!

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Apology No, admitting they screwed up Yes.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

About 5 years ago.

When was that?!

 

[Millard Fillmore]

Yes. Sign of submission.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Here's a standard case with my ex.

We get in a fight over something stupid, it escalates because she knows she's wrong but still tries to convince me that she's right and that I'm the one who's wrong. Then, she places the blame on me for arguing/fighting with her. So, I just turn around and leave. I'm not dealing with it. Right after, I'll usually get some "**** you!!" texts along with her still trying to convince me that she was in the right. I just ignore. I'm done with it and most likely her.

*2 to 3 days go by*

Text from her: Hey, can we talk?
Me: Sure (hoping she's going to apologize but full well knowing she's not)
She calls me.
Her: The other day.... I did this, and this and this....BUT that's because YOU did this and this....blah blah blah.
Me: *silence*
Her: Why can't we just get along?
Me: I know why.
Her: Do you want to come over and talk about it?
Me: No, but if you can give me a sincere apology over the phone right now, we can put this behind us and then I will come over.
Her: But 4 months ago YOU did blah blah blah blah.
Me: Yeah, I know. I apologized for it and I thought we moved on from it. But instead, you keep bringing it up every time you do something wrong.
Her: Yeah, but...
*silence*
Her: You're such an A$$HOLE!
Me: *click*

*1 hour goes by*

Text from Her: Okay, you're right I was wrong.
Me: *amazed she admitted that, but still waiting for an apology*
Her: Hello?
Me: Okay thank you for admitting that. So are you going to apologize?
Her: What for?? I said you were right and I was wrong.
Me: Yes, and in normal healthy communication, those words are usually proceded or followed by an apology.
Her: Why do you do this?? It's like you're just trying to be an a$$hole!!
Me: All I want is a ****ing sincere apology from you, THAT'S IT. Why can't you understand this simple ****ing thing??
Her: See, now you're getting angry. I don't even know if I want you to come over.

It's exactly like a Bill Burr skit. They just don't get it. There is something in their brains that just doesn't compute. Like has been mentioned, I have gotten a sincere apology, but it was WAY after real damage had been done.

 

[bat soup]

Women don't take responsibility for anything. That's a man's job.

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

Women don't take responsibility for anything. That's a man's job.

Sure, when women were home making babies and cooking us meals while we risked our necks out in the real world. Now they demand a piece of that but don't understand this thing called accountability.

 

[IKO69]

I have, it usually happened long after the incident took place / I had let it go and forgot about it. The couple of times I ran into someone or they hit me up out of the blue to talk I ended up accepting their apology. I left it at that though and never bothered to revisit the past- wasn't something I was interested in after accepting things and moving on.

I wasn't exactly the best at this and a couple of times the sting was something I carried for a long time. A lot of things that happened in the past I had accepted and forgave the other person & especially myself for not acting the way I thought I should have / letting it get to me. I never exactly tried to find out what the circumstances were although I suspect in a couple of cases the person had possibly been put through the ringer. I honestly got no satisfaction out of it - I know sh*t happens in life, we all fall short and make mistakes. I now know everyone gets what they deserve in time (what they call "karma") and I just try to focus on doing the best that I can, not worry about people who have done me wrong or what other people are doing in general. Several years ago I had accepted and let go a lot of hurts and it was one of the best things I ever did - felt like things drastically improved for me once I dropped all that stuff.

 

[Ricky]

Its rare. So rare that i struggle to remember

a few quick sorries but absolutely zero from my wife for some of the horrible stuff she has done.

not playing victim here but for her to apologize for that she might have to deal with real guilt

 

[Redwood]

It's a rarity.

 

[BMX]

It's not necessary because narcissists can't apologize. But my female attorney will rake any of these bytches over the coals..

 

[Scaramouche]

Hi Cyrus,
Sociological studies show to apologise is to give the impression of needing punishment...
Years ago Churchill said "Never apologise,never explain"....Our Old Queen made this her Golden Rule and she knew a thing or two.

 

[GotNoGame]

I activated my lurker account just to reply to this thread but yes, I have received a genuine apology from two different woman on two separate occasions after they had treated me poorly.

But to provide context:

1. One was Asian and the other was White
2. Both of them grew up in a stable middle-class background with supportive parents
3. Both of them were nerdy and maybe on the spectrum to an extent

I know I will sound very naive and blue-pilled to some of the members here, but I do not think receiving an apology from someone is a gender thing but more a cultural one and a reflection of that person's character as well. Where I live people do what @Scaramouche has described (Anglo-culture) which makes dealing with conflict insufferable because people double down on their mistakes and refuse to even acknowledge them. So instead of people just apologizing and moving on, you have to deal with a bunch of undisciplined adult children always trying to one-up each other all while pretending that the sun revolves around them.

 

[GotNoGame]

I have, it usually happened long after the incident took place / I had let it go and forgot about it. The couple of times I ran into someone or they hit me up out of the blue to talk I ended up accepting their apology. I left it at that though and never bothered to revisit the past- wasn't something I was interested in after accepting things and moving on.

I wasn't exactly the best at this and a couple of times the sting was something I carried for a long time. A lot of things that happened in the past I had accepted and forgave the other person & especially myself for not acting the way I thought I should have / letting it get to me. I never exactly tried to find out what the circumstances were although I suspect in a couple of cases the person had possibly been put through the ringer. I honestly got no satisfaction out of it - I know sh*t happens in life, we all fall short and make mistakes. I now know everyone gets what they deserve in time (what they call "karma") and I just try to focus on doing the best that I can, not worry about people who have done me wrong or what other people are doing in general. Several years ago I had accepted and let go a lot of hurts and it was one of the best things I ever did - felt like things drastically improved for me once I dropped all that stuff.

I found personally what has helped is to take extreme ownership of everything that has ever happened to me including any abuse I have received from someone else. If something bad happened to me then that was my fault and I was given an opportunity to learn from this event to prevent this from happening again (or deal with it better if it does repeat). Paradoxically, this lets me detach from the event as now I have control over the event and now I can get closure for myself as well because I find it far easier to forgive myself then it is to forgive someone else. Finally, now that I have control over the event why don't I revise it anyway? Instead of focusing on how the event went why don't I focus on a vision of that event where everything went perfectly? Human memory is fragile and unreliable but in this case this is to my benefit. I can corrupt my memories where what actually happened and my imagination blend together where whatever bull**** that occurred in the past just got turned into another memory not worth focusing on.

Just my two-cents.