Have any of you ever started an LTR with a Cold Approach?

[Bonhomme]

I take "cold approach" to mean an approach without any sort of "buying signal," such as eye contact and a smile.

Yes. And it's gone both ways. Sometimes the gal was the one who "cold approached" me.

Usually, though, there's been some kind of "instant opener," such as what she was wearing. One gal who approached me later told me she liked my hair, and -- get this -- she also said she didn't like men "checking her out." I reminded her she had checked me out, and I certainly didn't mind. Ahhh, women!

 

[Cod3r]

Glad to give you information...

Hmmm, I feel like writing alot (work in a few, but what the hell)

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Little background, my game is strong. I've been through alot of women and I'm only 21 and most like you other fellas on here were just approaches and lays within a few days or the same night, no real connection or anything... BUT

My current gf right now of 4 months and going REAL strong was a true cold approach out of a loud ass club in NYC. I saw her, assumed attraction, as i'm a good looking guy with great style (i juss assume it, females substantiate it) grabbed her hand and we danced for about 3 songs before I said a word to her..

I just opened with my regular, "wow so you can dance, guess I can ask your name now ?" she told me, a little CnF since she has Japanese and accent and wierd name (haha). From there, more dancing, no real talking... juss enjoying the night no pressure.. Ended up dancing till aroun 4 00 AM, then finally I just handed her my phone, she put number in, and we walked to the subway together shared a nice lip to lip kiss and a goodnight...

Called 2 days later, asked to set someting else up, she agreed. Met and got lost on our way to club (great for attraction btw, girls love things like this) laughed, blah blah, more talk this time @ the bar... age, work, ect.. regular stuff and we left early cuz she was tired.... she fell asleep in my arms and I walked her home, and that was date 2....

Basically after that, natural connection took its course. I was into her, but she had an ex-bf she was into, I didn't press the issue and told her 'good luck' and 'hope it works out' and was upbeat about it, I had a great time, no reason to sulk or be mad or anything... 3 daays later she called wanting to go back out and from there its pretty much end of story... She took away my 'playa cape', no desire for anything else... she tamed me... dermit !

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Onto your question about approaching, I went through this stage (I know u folks are older, but i got into these sites a while ago, so i been there) I was told, approach, approach, approach and I did and yeah somethings happened that never happened before... I got hot girls numbers !! OMG !! I had sex, OMG !!! But really in the end, not happy cuz its not what I was really looking for, everyone wants love and you can't 'approach' love... it juss happens

If you want my advice, I say live your life and let females live their lives. If you intertwine and get tangled together, be your cool and so suave (pun intended) self and let the chips fall where they may. When you start 'trying' to do anything ur doooomed, girls usually like the lil mistakes you make anyway as long as you're confident enough to laugh at them urself and confident enough to make her confident in herself <-- diff. story for diff day... but yeah man, only approach a girl thats TRULY intriguing for some reason and not just the hot blonde bimbo with gum in her hair... approaching countless girls 1 after the other, after the other, after the other, what kind of life is that ??? Sounds like a loser to me


-Cod3r

 

[Latinoman]

Hmmm, I feel like writing alot (work in a few, but what the hell)

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Little background, my game is strong. I've been through alot of women and I'm only 21 and most like you other fellas on here were just approaches and lays within a few days or the same night, no real connection or anything...




-Cod3r

No offence, but you are 21. You have more than likely do the cold approach to teenagers and women in the 20-21 year old range.

ANYONE that is over 30 (or in his upper 20s) should have ZERO concerns about doing cold approaches on those women. Lot of more experience, perhaps more $, and certainly more confidence.

 

[Cod3r]

^ No offense taken, but ironically...

I can't remember the last time I talked to any woman under 25. My previous ex-gf was 26, and dates were all at least 24. My current gf is 35. I'm not the average 21 year old, I can't talk to the young females, not on my same wave-length as me and hence never seems to work out so i juss abandoned them


-Cod3r

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

I dont get your statement about you can't turn a cold approach into love and you can't look for love...

Cold approaching is JUST speculation... You see someone that is physically pleasing and you give her an oppurtunity to enter your world, and if she fits your fancy she either become a ONS, an FB, a date, and maybe even a GF.

Approaching isn't about looking for love; it is about meeting women that you find attractive. What kind of lame (sorry for the harshness) see's a chick and instantly decides that there's my future LOVE...

Let's get real playas

 

[grinder]

Like A-Unit said; ultimately they are all cold.

Answer: Yes. Met her walking down the hall of a hospital. How about 21 years, that LTR enough for you? She always used to tell everyone "Oh, its was meant to be, our paths crossed there and then...". Of course we know the truth, for me it was the umteenth or so "path" I crossed that year.

Proof also that NOTHING LASTS FOREVER!

 

[d9930380]

I know a few guys who have a LTR or a wife from CA in clubs.

But generally - I believe that if you don't **** them that night then it won't go anywhere. And we all know that if you do **** them that night, YOU loose interest. Hell, I loose interest even if I haven't.

I think most people would agree that a club is NOT a good place to go to meet a future LTGF. But it happens.

 

[Bonhomme]

An older man should not "sarge" much younger women in the usual sense, lest he get tagged with the "creepy old man" label. He should be very low-key and non-sexual in approaching such women, and if attraction on their part arises, then flow with it.

 

[d9930380]

Nefty - If you have a problem CA - You probably don't THINK you're good looking. Just send a friend in first to talk to the girls - not FOR you offcourse. Wait a while, then enter the group.

They won't be threatened by you and will give you more of a chance and take some pressure of you. If you can keep them laughing they will start to "see the person" and that will actually help them become physically attracted to you. Girls love personality, but WILL reject purely on looks without ever giving the guy a chance.

 

[Phyzzle]

I beg to differ. I just turned 33 and have many concerns about cold approaching ANY women. Actually, it's just one big concern: I can't do it to save my life.

Man, you should try. I think it's important, just to reduce the fear of rejection. Don't worry about finding a gf: I think the concensus here is that you can, it's just really hard.

Answer: Yes. Met her walking down the hall of a hospital. How about 21 years, that LTR enough for you?

What were the 1st words out of your mouth? It appears that situational pickups work best. None of this "excuse me can I ask you a question are you single" stuff. You can get #'s that way, but they go nowhere.

My experience: maybe a dozen CA's, a dozen #'s , 6 eventually answered their phone or returned a call, 4 dates made, 1 actually showed up without last second cancelling, and she was half deaf from punk concerts, and conversation was pretty gruelling. No rapport was possible, so neither of us could get interested.
~Phyzzle

 

[grinder]

Phyzzle:

Regarding the extra LTR from a cold meeting in the hall of a hosptial. It was all EC with nothing but a "Hi". 10 min later saw her in the waiting room and followed up. It's been a long time so I can't remember the words exactly. It was very basic, "who you visiting, how they doing, Yeah, me too...." Words don't mean a goddammed thing, its presence, "beingthereness".