Has anyone

[bittersweet]

gone through a part of life with a lot of depression and you feel like its hard to pull yourself out? Any success stories? I put myself through some rough **** and i guess it would help.

 

[Swampcamel]

I have these bouts usually after a long relationship where I wasn't spinning plates ends. I usually coped with this by going on a big adventure out of state or out of country because it A) forced me to keep NC and B) I gotta experience a ton of new things.

The only problem with this is that when I get home, I'd get thrown back into the system and routines of every day life and have a reality check clawing my eyes out. I'd get lackadaisical and unmotivated for months, get bored with the women (cause they suck compared to travelling, adventure type girls), and just go into a stupor that involved too much internet, too much drinking with equally depressed friends and the like.

The only way I ever get out of these is to start hanging out with better, happier people and to start feeling some successes in the regular realm of existence. Get a job I really like, work on music with talented friends, make out with different women and yes, fvck them, too, but set the goal low and don't expect sex as the result of your interactions and you'll be elated by even your marginal successes. Then you can transition into bigger successes like getting laid and advancing your projects further in the days that follow with great confidence cause you already see that you're winning at life.

Little easy goals that make you feel like you're improving your life because of your actions and choices. Eat a little better, use your time to read or plan or practice your passions, exercise more than you do. You'll feel better fast, and you'll be on top of your life again in no time.

If you need some understanding, read some encouraging, mind-expanding literature. I personally like tantric philosophers like Osho, it fits my view of reality, but I've also been encouraged by western authors like Heidegger and some Nietzsche. You could also read modern self-help books for the easy reads, but I find most of the content to be pandering and almost condescending. Basically, the stuff I read affirms for that the world is full of ****, but your inner world is only what you allow in, and how to master the self so that you control exactly what's inside you, what you feel and how you respond to life.

 

[bigneil]

Of course. It's important to remember at both the low and high points that life tends to follow a wave pattern of ups and downs. Let the low points inspire you and savor the high points.

 

[VikingKing]

I'd get lackadaisical and unmotivated for months, get bored with the women (cause they suck compared to travelling, adventure type girls), and just go into a stupor that involved too much internet, too much drinking with equally depressed friends and the like.


this has been the last 8 months of my life. Dumped after ltr, did the opposite if what i should, drank my money away, lost my job. Finally got a new job slowly getting it together.

my social skill are better than they have ever been at work, but im terrible at making friends. So unmotivated.

 

[Swampcamel]

If you feel like "you're bad at making friends," you either come off as desperate or your conversation is boring.

A rule of conversation: Don't try to impress them with your intellect and all the useless knowledge you've gleaned from books and the internet. Gear those brains toward your wit, turn what they're saying on its head to tease other people, establish a flow, and look for openings in their conversation to ask more questions or give your opinion about something. If they can't flow with you, they're boring and it's always going to be like that with those people so fvck em. And remember that, say fvck em more often. (But don't be a fvcking cynical bvtch about it, keep it real)

If you're not boring them with trivia, then you're acting needy or desperate "cuz u want friendz so bad!" In which case, fix that idea, it's all in your head. You're awesome and most people are ****heads and you don't want to be friends with them anyway. Don't be talking to a person because you're looking for friends. Talk to a person because you think they're actually interesting and you have things in common. Remember that when you go out.

Which is actually the only other barrier. Go out more. Not bars and clubs, that's for practicing pickup and one night stands. Go to shows, dance lessons, gatherings, speeches. Grab a local city mag and find something you know you'll like and you'll have something in common with everyone there. If you get in the swing of things with anyone there, bounce to get some food and drinks after. Done deal.

 

[VikingKing]

If you feel like "you're bad at making friends," you either come off as desperate or your conversation is boring.

A rule of conversation: Don't try to impress them with your intellect and all the useless knowledge you've gleaned from books and the internet. Gear those brains toward your wit, turn what they're saying on its head to tease other people, establish a flow, and look for openings in their conversation to ask more questions or give your opinion about something. If they can't flow with you, they're boring and it's always going to be like that with those people so fvck em. And remember that, say fvck em more often. (But don't be a fvcking cynical bvtch about it, keep it real)

If you're not boring them with trivia, then you're acting needy or desperate "cuz u want friendz so bad!" In which case, fix that idea, it's all in your head. You're awesome and most people are ****heads and you don't want to be friends with them anyway. Don't be talking to a person because you're looking for friends. Talk to a person because you think they're actually interesting and you have things in common. Remember that when you go out.

Which is actually the only other barrier. Go out more. Not bars and clubs, that's for practicing pickup and one night stands. Go to shows, dance lessons, gatherings, speeches. Grab a local city mag and find something you know you'll like and you'll have something in common with everyone there. If you get in the swing of things with anyone there, bounce to get some food and drinks after. Done deal.

I dont even try really, most of my interaction is with co-wokers, and i am much more reserved, but friendly with the women, I understand that aspect now its just my selfesteem. I regularly game people in general just as practice, even when i go to the bar I just talk to people, get them to talk about themselves. I drank away 2,000 dollars and beat myself up for like 7 months. So im focusing on getting my life togather, saving money, and working on social skills. I was never in this bad of shape in my life before. But much better than 5 months ago.

 

[whatwg]

Just listening, be interested and asking questions will go a long way towards making friends.

 

[VikingKing]

Just listening, be interested and asking questions will go a long way towards making friends.

Yeah I try to ask people things about themselves that they like to talk about. Then try to subtly relate.

 

[Purefilth]

Of course we've all had low points, but I like to concentrate on the highlights.

 

[Clinic]

gone through a part of life with a lot of depression and you feel like its hard to pull yourself out? Any success stories? I put myself through some rough **** and i guess it would help.

Just don't be on your own with it - you need to talk about it properly with people that you know will care. Depression can make you feel pretty isolated, so you need to do everything you can to counter that.

 

[switch]

Just don't be on your own with it - you need to talk about it properly with people that you know will care. Depression can make you feel pretty isolated, so you need to do everything you can to counter that.

worst advice possible. nobody cares about a depressed person not even their parents, please read that again.

it was advice like that which made me vulnerable and cost me a couple of thousand bucks on a chick who turned BPD and fawked me over even more.

"get help,talk with friends, confide in a priest/parents/escort" ,<<<<<<you see all that over there? its BS.bcuz no one cares.

OP should realize that getting past depression doesnt need drugs or a psychologist or any other magical solution.

there are steps
1.first realize that everyone is an azzhole and hypocrite.there is no help.
this is like learning how to swim, as long as you think mr.life guard is there to save you, you wont learn.

2.say "fawk everything", stop overthinking everything like a chess game with kasparov

3.find and eliminate toxic people in your life, you know the thing is hollywood has made us to believe that we "need" friends to be happy
it has made some really fawked up myths concerning friends in our heads, just like it has with women, dudez you will never find a friend who will
stick through sh!t with you, its very rare, also we dont "need" friends tolive, they aint oxygen or water
i used to be depressed bcuz i had no friends, when i decided idont need them , i found myself with lots of cool people === friends

4.a lot of people will tell you to find a new hobby, which is BS since a depressed individual cant even lift his fingers.instead find a goal and focus on that.

5.stop fapping, too much fapping makes you depressed and limp.

6.lie to yourself, lie to everyone,tell them that you are happy,and you dont need help.this is very important

7.know that everyone is full of sh!t, dont try to find a friend in this phase bcuz you are vulnerable and you might get a toxic one instead
find friends after you recover

8.no alcohol :nono:

i was a social outcast, a NEET and hikikomori,i was scared of going shopping at a new unfamiliar shop, i had to plan my shopping trips a week in advance and eventually i would talk myself out of it.once i lived on biscuits and sugar for a whole week.i still remember those days,i had difficulty saying hello to my own family...i asked a neanderthal weirdo girl and got rejected,i have no effing idea why i asked her i mean damn she ugly...:crazy:

i have come a long way, i mean geez i was scared of walking into a shop twice in the same week, thinking people would think im weird...i was that fawked.but now im outgoing, social and slowly becoming what you call a "MAN" although it will take another 2 years or so

 

[VikingKing]

worst advice possible. nobody cares about a depressed person not even their parents, please read that again.

it was advice like that which made me vulnerable and cost me a couple of thousand bucks on a chick who turned BPD and fawked me over even more.

"get help,talk with friends, confide in a priest/parents/escort" ,<<<<<<you see all that over there? its BS.bcuz no one cares.

OP should realize that getting past depression doesnt need drugs or a psychologist or any other magical solution.

there are steps
1.first realize that everyone is an azzhole and hypocrite.there is no help.
this is like learning how to swim, as long as you think mr.life guard is there to save you, you wont learn.

2.say "fawk everything", stop overthinking everything like a chess game with kasparov

3.find and eliminate toxic people in your life, you know the thing is hollywood has made us to believe that we "need" friends to be happy
it has made some really fawked up myths concerning friends in our heads, just like it has with women, dudez you will never find a friend who will
stick through sh!t with you, its very rare, also we dont "need" friends tolive, they aint oxygen or water
i used to be depressed bcuz i had no friends, when i decided idont need them , i found myself with lots of cool people === friends

4.a lot of people will tell you to find a new hobby, which is BS since a depressed individual cant even lift his fingers.instead find a goal and focus on that.

5.stop fapping, too much fapping makes you depressed and limp.

6.lie to yourself, lie to everyone,tell them that you are happy,and you dont need help.this is very important

7.know that everyone is full of sh!t, dont try to find a friend in this phase bcuz you are vulnerable and you might get a toxic one instead
find friends after you recover

8.no alcohol :nono:

i was a social outcast, a NEET and hikikomori,i was scared of going shopping at a new unfamiliar shop, i had to plan my shopping trips a week in advance and eventually i would talk myself out of it.once i lived on biscuits and sugar for a whole week.i still remember those days,i had difficulty saying hello to my own family...i asked a neanderthal weirdo girl and got rejected,i have no effing idea why i asked her i mean damn she ugly...:crazy:

i have come a long way, i mean geez i was scared of walking into a shop twice in the same week, thinking people would think im weird...i was that fawked.but now im outgoing, social and slowly becoming what you call a "MAN" although it will take another 2 years or so

Thanks for the advice. Its what I need.

 

[foreverAFC]

yup, the world is a dark place, get used to it

i suffer from depression and have no social life, i just keep myself busy with work, weight lifting, martial arts, and marijuana

ive accepted things for what they are, im going to do my best to find my own way and take care of myself, **** everyone else

 

[BrownBear]

worst advice possible. nobody cares about a depressed person not even their parents, please read that again.

it was advice like that which made me vulnerable and cost me a couple of thousand bucks on a chick who turned BPD and fawked me over even more.

"get help,talk with friends, confide in a priest/parents/escort" ,<<<<<<you see all that over there? its BS.bcuz no one cares.

OP should realize that getting past depression doesnt need drugs or a psychologist or any other magical solution.

there are steps
1.first realize that everyone is an azzhole and hypocrite.there is no help.
this is like learning how to swim, as long as you think mr.life guard is there to save you, you wont learn.

2.say "fawk everything", stop overthinking everything like a chess game with kasparov

3.find and eliminate toxic people in your life, you know the thing is hollywood has made us to believe that we "need" friends to be happy
it has made some really fawked up myths concerning friends in our heads, just like it has with women, dudez you will never find a friend who will
stick through sh!t with you, its very rare, also we dont "need" friends tolive, they aint oxygen or water
i used to be depressed bcuz i had no friends, when i decided idont need them , i found myself with lots of cool people === friends

4.a lot of people will tell you to find a new hobby, which is BS since a depressed individual cant even lift his fingers.instead find a goal and focus on that.

5.stop fapping, too much fapping makes you depressed and limp.

6.lie to yourself, lie to everyone,tell them that you are happy,and you dont need help.this is very important

7.know that everyone is full of sh!t, dont try to find a friend in this phase bcuz you are vulnerable and you might get a toxic one instead
find friends after you recover

8.no alcohol :nono:

i was a social outcast, a NEET and hikikomori,i was scared of going shopping at a new unfamiliar shop, i had to plan my shopping trips a week in advance and eventually i would talk myself out of it.once i lived on biscuits and sugar for a whole week.i still remember those days,i had difficulty saying hello to my own family...i asked a neanderthal weirdo girl and got rejected,i have no effing idea why i asked her i mean damn she ugly...:crazy:

i have come a long way, i mean geez i was scared of walking into a shop twice in the same week, thinking people would think im weird...i was that fawked.but now im outgoing, social and slowly becoming what you call a "MAN" although it will take another 2 years or so

And now you have Roid Rage :moon: