Ace_McGregor said:
I heard this about handshakes please give me your feedback...
When shaking guy's hand vertically in business, sometimes the other guy will try to turn your palm where it becomes face up. This is a sign of dominance by the other man. I heard that you were suppose to not let them turn your hand where it is face up so that you don't become "submissive" to the other person.
Not sure how this applies to shaking women's hands - but it seems like if you shook a girl's hand with your palm up you would be unconsciously showing signs of submission.
What do you think?
Centurion, what is the European handshake?
Ace - yeah, they actually talked about that move in the second book I mentioned. It shows that this person will probably try to dominate you (there was an African dictator who always shook this way).
The "counter" named in the book is very subtle. It says that when a person attempts this, you should not try to straighten it (that leads to arm wrestling). Instead, it says you should move the right foot then the left foot to the right, so that he will straighten out his hand. When you are pulling this maneuver, the most important thing is to say something distracting so that only subconscious attention is on the manoeuvre you are pulling. For business you say, "I have some products I think will really interest you." For pleasure you say, "I didn't expect to see you here" and so on.
It says to make sure it's worth "evening out" the handshake. Either a person will respect you for doing so, or they will resent you. Ultimately, it's up to you to make the choice.
I was astonished to see a section on "counter-handshakes." I had no idea pumping somebody's clammy hand was such an art. Handshakes are a little thing, but the better I get, the more people warm up (I'm not a particularly easy-going, funny-pants so I need every advantage I can get). Now I see every handshake as an opportunity to connect, to open a new door.
In closing, I should tell you a story that happened to me last week. I had applied for a job at my local library, and I was visiting there with a friend who knew the director of hiring. Who do you think walked past but the director of hiring. My friend called me over, and said some stupid praises to which the guy was indifferent. When he had finally finished, I asked what the man's name was and I reached over to shake his hand. Then something very odd happened. If you're a skeptic, I guess you're not going to believe me. But as our hands clasped, suddenly my entire body seemed to be shining with a brilliant light - not a light that one could perceive with their eyes, but it was blinding nonetheless. I felt childish, and completely innocent. This light didn't come from him, it came from me as if his grabbing my hand had been a power switch. I thought I was hallucinating. At the time, it seemed to me that he had certainly seen this light as well. But I told myself afterwards that it was all in my head, and that to think he might have seen this light too was absurd. It was not
visual light. Still, this certainty persisted.
I thought this was a curious incident, but I acted as though nothing had happened (since I would be a fruitcake to claim that something had). Then not three days later, I read that Washington Policy Handshaking book. Someone in the book told a story almost identical to mine about shaking hands with someone and suddenly being covered in a warm and blinding light. In that story, the person had been terrified to ask at the moment, but he had asked the other person later, "I've always wanted to ask you this: when we first met did you see the light that shone from me when we shook hands?" The person, astonished, replied, "yes, I did!" Maybe the same thing happened in my case...
