Handling Racist Situations

[aBAzLLnA]

I'm asian and unsurprisingly I've heard plenty of racist comments. The comments, I don't care about, but handling situations is the topic I want to discuss.

How do you react to a racist comment? What is your objective with this reaction, and how do you want to be perceived with this reaction?

I want to keep this discussion serious, even though one CAN play the racist comment off like a joke, but let's be realistic, for the minorities, it's a ***** dealing with it.

 

[i1t4yomindi]

I'm Chinese and I have a lot of white friends. Sometimes they'll joke around and their comments might be considered racist, but I don't take it seriously. Even though I may not like it I'll play it cool and be like "Yeah..sure man!" (with a smirk on my face). If they REALLY say something off the top of line, I'll usually say something to them. Maybe like "Dude..that was ****ed up." Then the usual response I get is a smart ass one...such as "OOKAY Ching...I'll stop...Are you alright?" HAHA It's actually kind of amusing but they eventually stop anyway.

I know dealing with racism is hard but you just have to take it in a lighter way. I used to be self-concious and take a lot of things seriously, now I don't. I've come to accept that many people are just curious since I'm from another culture. Maybe a way they express that curiosity is by joking.

On the other hand, if a stranger just makes racist comments..then they're just being idiots. Obviously they are ignorant and have nothing else to attack you with. In this case, I just walk away (treat them as if they don't even exist). Everytime I've done this they just get bored and realize that messing with me is not worth it. They stop as well. If they chase you down, however, then GO KICK HIS ASS!

Hope this helps. Later man!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Personally I seldom notice racist comments. I look at it like this, I sure as h3ll NOT the national representative of my race. To tell the truth, most of the stereotypical BS that people joke about has some truth to it (at least with my race), so I usually laugh. However, if it's pointed specifically at me and it isn't true I just tell them that they're generalizing and it's obvious that they don't know me.

But again, I don't sweat over it because 99.9% of the time, whatever they say doesn't hold true to me.

 

[MindOverMatter]

return the favor. every race has stereotypes.

 

[The_Mole]

my friends make fun of me for being chinese and not as big body as them but its true, asians are small

my friends make fun of me cuz asians have small ****s, they dont know if its true or not cuz they never seen it

but it is true and its hard to defend myself when they are right but dont know it

 

[Skel]

If your friends make racist comments then deal with it. They are your friends and you chose them as friends. If its someone you dont know ignore them because they arent worth the trouble.

 

[Shiftkey]

I'm white but it bothers me when someone makes a racist comment/joke about minorities too. Most of my friends have been either latino or asian, so that's probably why. I usually just give them a half ass smile that humors them - usually shuts them up faster than anything else.

My roommate is racist though (white male from southeast). I've been hinting at him that it's not right and that I don't like it, but I'm probably going to have to be more blunt.

On a related note, when a female makes a sexist comment I'll flat out tell them they're wrong and why.

 

[DJD]

I agree with trying to take it in a lighter way - it really depends on how you perceived the intent of the person who said it.

I'll give you a personal example from real life... I'm shopping and see a cool leather jacket on the other side of the rack where a black man and his woman were shopping. I couldn't get to the other side to get a closer look because they were exactly in the aisle where I need to go to get a better look at the jacket. So I reached across the open rack to get a better look... turns out it was a Sean Jean, and when the black man saw me looking at it, he said "Oh yeah man, that's really you" sort of poking fun at me (it was obvious that he wasn't really trying to offend me). I laughed with him, because I wouldn't wear Sean Jean (or Fubu) because my sense is that it's really designed for and targeted toward young black people. Despite this, I thought to myself later that if I'd seen him looking at something by Tommy Hilfiger and made a comment similar to his about the inappropriateness of the clothes, my guess is that he probably wouldn't have found it quite so funny.

I find that some non-whites think you're racist if you joke about their group, but they're not being racist when they joke about whites - then it's just all good fun. Also, I've noticed that some non-white men (esp. hispanic and black) feel that you should not approach 'their' women if you're white, but that they should have an open field on white chicks. No offense to anyone, and it is certainly not true of all persons in any group (duh), but that is what I've noticed.

I do think that MOST comments among people who are friendly are just good-natured joking around. At the same time, what is funny to one person isn't always funny to another. Not so much in a racist vein, but in an ageist one... I have some younger friends (early to mid 20s) who joke with me about being older or the 'old man', but in truth, we hang and have a good time, and they've seen me be approached by and score with good-looking women from their own age group. I know they're joking with me about the age thing, but it still isn't that funny. I usually say 'whatever' when they joke with me, but in one case, I had to ask a friend (who was only 5 years younger than I, and he and I both were above 30) to give the age thing a rest.

 

[Julian]

At my old job (clothes store in the mall) i think i was the only non white mofo there. Wait there was 1 black dude.

Anyway i always BS with a couple dudes and they were like dude put this on!

he handed me a fuccin flannel long sleeve button up (Mexican gangster style) and told me to put it on. I did and only buttoned the top button and then i said in a thick Mexican accent "Ey mayne chu got a prahlem wit me? I cut you!"

Im half Mexican so it was funny because i was just bein a stereotypical mexican thug. But it was all in fun and i took no offense to it.

Ive been called spic before by close friends only a couple of times but i dont care. Ive been called a nazi more -_-. All in all most people are idiots regardless of who they are so u just gotta deal with it. if u feel disrespected then let them know you dont take that kind of sh1t, but if u dont, then just laugh and write it off as whatever.

 

[aBAzLLnA]

if u feel disrespected then let them know you dont take that kind of sh1t, but if u dont, then just laugh and write it off as whatever.

Exactly.

Hah, today, a friend whom I respect said, "Well, asians DO have smaller ****s...", when I was sitting right behind him during lunch. Everyone just stops, and looks at my reaction, and my friend then, in shock, turns around to say, "Oh ****...my bad man, I forgot you were here..." I'm thinking, SO...If I wasn't here, you'd still say the same thing, pathetic fool. I was already getting ready to leave when he said it, so I just sat there, swiveling my drink in the cup for a couple seconds, then simply replied, "I'll pretend I didn't hear thing" and got up to leave.

Moral of the story: Watch what you say and to whom you say it to. And, if you have nothing good to say, don't say a thing.

 

[diablo]

The last 3 replies to this thread have been deleted. You 3 posters know who you are.

Let me remind everyone:

NO POLITICAL REMARKS

Also, comments with inherent racism will be removed as well. This will not be a repeat of the thread from the other day where it degrades to flaming - it serves no purpose and won't be tolerated.

 

[CapiCrimini]

NO POLITICAL REMARKS

but are't the biggest politics personal issues. SO now we can't talk about personal issues like dating!



Everybody grab your pillow cases two planks of wood and a lighter. Were gonna dress up as ghosts and scare all the rich people out of town.

On a serious note...

it's a ***** dealing with it.

wanna know what i hate the most. the above. miorities act like they are the only people who get the racist card played. I really fon't give a crap about races. I really don't see blacks and whites as different unless they allow there to be a difference. It bothers me when some people of other races give me bad eyes and act like I'm different. Especially the poor. Whenever i'm in the ghetto. Almost every person there acts like I'm public enemy number 1. I personally don't have nay problem with people unless they have a problem with me.

THE BIGGEST RACISTS in my opinion arn't people who are different races or the same race. IT IS the PEOPLE WHO BLAME OTHER THINGS FOR THIER PROBLEMS. thats the majority of racists, people who can't take effect for there own mistakes or what is given to them. black, white, mexican, asian, or anyone else.

if someone plays the racist card in good nature go along with it. It's all fun. If someone told me I have funky looking hair or a funny face, I take it the same as when my black friends call me cracker.

Acceptance isn't blending, it's accepting and understanding the differences and using them to work the best together and not against each other.

 

[Ricky]

I made a politcial remark but it was true. Most people don't know about that.

I think threads about race should be removed too. This started out as a decent idea, but it has really gone downhill.

 

[aBAzLLnA]

This is not about hating racists or hating. This is about dealing with racism. Please try and keep on topic.

I posted my experience at the top, I hope my friend, whom i've lost a lot of respect for has learned something from that experience.

If there are any other good suggestions, please post.

 

[GlutusMaximus86]

Well since I live in a county where about 95% or more of the population is white so I don't encounter it much. However most people around here complain about the Hispanics in the area. It's sad how many racistists remarks (each remark is different though and some are much worse then others) I've heard about the Hispanics from both the students and my professors at the college (also the muslims, blacks, and all other minorities, but not as bad.) In this county people have a hard time understanding how my family and I can eat at a popeyes, (which is about 20-25 min from our house) which has almost all minority workers and customers, and not feel the least bit uncomfortable. But I also did this summer work in a pharmacy where me and the pharmacist where the only white guys back there, and it didn't bother me at all.

I'm sure I am a little bit racist sub-consciounsly because of the area I live in, (sp?) but supposedly about 70% of all people are racist sub-consciounsly. Hopefully when I go to a 4 year college I will at least see more minorities, and also hear less remarks.

 

[mahon83050]

I am prejudice at times (most people are) but try to live by...."Do not judge people by the color of their skin, but the content of their character. I actually try and live by those words that MLK spoke (I am white by the way.)

Someone else also wrote once: "Judge people as individuals, never as a group.

I.E, if some black/white/Asian/Hispanic man is acting obnoxious and being an a-hole....do not think that is typical because he is B/W/A/H or it is in his biological nature. One must think, the guy is just an a-hole and that is final.

Abazllna,

You should just laugh at them and state all the things the Chinese accomplished did before the White Europeans.

I know what I am about to say may contradict what I just stated earlier above. Asians as a group, compared to Whites and Blacks:

1.) Seem the most reserved
2.) Seem the most respectful
3.) Seem the least obnoxious ( I am yet, to see a group of Asians acting all loud and ignorant. However, you see this behavior with all the other races.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

If they were racist they wouldn't be your freind.Stop acting like a heezy.

 

[m4a1]

I agree with Tha Realnezz, it's quite funny when you compare what you said now, and what you said yesterday (before your post was deleted) What a hypocrite!

So many people are sensitive, and quick to judge and call you racist, most generalizations are true, that's why they're called that. It's not just a race issue, but a life-style. That's why people laugh when they hear "blonde jokes", there are lots of smart blondes, but the majority is stupid for obvious reasons.

 

[Tha Realnezz]

I'm not a hypocrite or a racist.

People say blatantly racist things here to get a rise out of certain minorities on this board.Yet the mods do nothing.

So when I read something like "I have a friend who's black and dresses clean unlike you guys" Understand that i'm gonna let him have it,it's not my fault that those people can't handle their own medicine.

 

[aBAzLLnA]

This is what I'm talking about. You hear or see or read a racist comment, and people overreact. I'm saying, why not be the bigger man and explain to the kid that what he said was ridiculous?