Had one great date, then nada

[Gangster Of Love]

It makes perfect sense to me. She doesn't like him and thought she would do the honourable thing and tell him instead of standing him up and not showing up for the day.

MacAvoy,

You are absolutely right. That message she left made no sense, but I couldnt' tell who had said it. It was her and she is actually telling you straight out, she is not interested, just didn't know how to tell you after spending 6 hours with you. This is a bufette (sp), so move on to a clean plate.

 

[tsmith2334]

Taken from another thread:

tsmith's response to flaking

"Turn the tables...

After the flake, get in touch with her and tell her you're sorry it didn't work out. Don't set anything in stone, but tell her you'll call her the next day, that weekend, etc. When exactly isn't important, but give her a specific timeframe. Then... don't call. Even the playing field. She's not 100% reliable, so why should you be? You've got important things to do too, and she's no longer your top priority.

Iniate contact again, no apology neccesary. Only acknowledge your flaking if she brings it up, and just say "I didn't think we definitely had plans, my bad". Ask her if she wants to hang out again and follow-through this time.

Works like a charm."

As to why you're giving her a "second chance"... people flake. Especially beautiful women in high demand. It happens in LTRs, even marriages. It's part of life.

 

[DJDamage]

Six hours sounds like overkill for a first date.

6 hours is like 2-3 dates rolled into one. It isn't recommanded unless you know exectly what you are doing.

After 6 hours If you didn't end up in a hot tub somewhere, making out like crazy and had your hands all over her goodies then IT WAS OVERKILL. There has to be a certain balance between being friendly and going after her ass, and if you become too friendly for too long then you will become a friend forever.

Don't over do it on the first date, always make sure you end up leaving her wanting more, unless she begs for you to fvck her right there and then.

 

[ready123]

"sorry I just got your message but I'm not a stander-upper, even though I just got stood up....but, I just don't think maybe it's a good idea, be well and have a good night."

somebody explain to me what the fvck this means

 

[penkitten]

somebody explain to me what the fvck this means

it means:
i just got your message and want to reply because i dont want someone to think i stood them up, but i do not feel like going out with you tonight because i, myself, just got stood up by someone else tonight and i just don't feel like leaving the house.

 

[DonJuan11]

"sorry I just got your message but I'm not a stander-upper, even though I just got stood up....but, I just don't think maybe it's a good idea, be well and have a good night."

Oh man. OK I know what she was trying to say but the way she said it doesn't make sense.


"I'm not a stander-upper" that doesn't make sense

"even though I just got stood up" who did you get stood up by? why would he care?

 

[Effington]

Sounds like you thought the date was a lot better than she did..

 

[AFC Savior]

oh god why are you confused as to why she flaked???

1) u did not try to kiss her. You tried to be some PUA tactics clown focusing on convo, kino, venu, c+f, negs, and whatever else u did for 6 hours....but u didnt kiss her. SHE WANTS A MAN THAT WILL NOT ONLY KISS HER, BUT WILL ALSO MAKE HER SO HORNY THAT SHE WILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH HIM

2) #1 covers it all

next time, dont be a pvssy and actually be sexual like a MAN

 

[AFC Savior]

Sounds like you thought the date was a lot better than she did..

its classic chump AFC thinking, to think that a date went 10 times better than it really did

its not a good date unless you at the very least make out passionately, and most preferably, have amazing orgasmic naughty sex

women dont need some chump guy to talk to, they already have enough of those

 

[KarmaSutra]

1) u did not try to kiss her. You tried to be some PUA tactics clown focusing on convo, kino, venu, c+f, negs, and whatever else u did for 6 hours....but u didnt kiss her. SHE WANTS A MAN THAT WILL NOT ONLY KISS HER, BUT WILL ALSO MAKE HER SO HORNY THAT SHE WILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH HIM

Though Skip Jr. is crude, abrassive and obnoxious as fvck, he does make a point.

It appears you performed every monkey/robotic move in the PUA manual except the one thing that counts; Exude your sexuality and use your aggressiveness to take the initiative. It's quite possible she had a wonderful time but by neglecting to step ahead of her ever so slightly she chose to pass on anything in the future. The fact that she let you know that she wasn't interested is a plus on her part as she did not lead you on and nipped your further advances in the ass. This is what you should have done brother.

next time, dont be a pvssy and actually be sexual like a MAN

This statement pisses me off more than anything else. THIS is pure AFC speak. You'll tell a man to "be a man" but will not give him a positive example or suggestion as to go about getting there. These AFC euphamisms are trite and show that the speaker knows less about the subject than the person who started the conversation.

Lead by example. Don't say it, dear boy, DO IT!

 

[thirdtimescharm]

It makes perfect sense to me. She doesn't like him and thought she would do the honourable thing and tell him instead of standing him up and not showing up for the day.

I have not called her back as yet, as I have been mostly busy meeting other women and since she showed a lack of interest, I mostly moved on. I will say that while it was "nice" of her to actually call me back, I felt that "it isn't a good idea" was pretty senseless. I mean, if you are going to call and cancel, saying "I have to wash my hair" would have at least been useful and I would have had a clear understanding of being nexted. Her response just left me shrugging. Probably a wasted of time in any case.

 

[thirdtimescharm]

its classic chump AFC thinking, to think that a date went 10 times better than it really did

its not a good date unless you at the very least make out passionately, and most preferably, have amazing orgasmic naughty sex

women dont need some chump guy to talk to, they already have enough of those

I agree, and actually, what I wanted to tell her on a call back was just that...that the only thing wrong with the date was that I wasn't able to get closer to her (the club we were at had these very separate chairs, made it hard to get extremely cozy). We did have a great kiss when we got back to her place, but with the kid upstairs, nothing was going to happen (and she told me early on that it would take a while before she introduced the kid to anyone).