Had a great first date, now what??

jackhamma

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
86
Reaction score
1
Met a girl a few days ago through a group of friends, we hit it off so we exchanged numbers.

Went on a first date last night and we had a great date. The entire night she was touching me a lot, flirting etc. Night ended with us making out. She is not a ho so she was not going to give it up. I am also not looking to just hit it and quit it.

After we kissed she said "I had a great time, I'll call you tomorrow"

I am not good with what to do after the first date. Do I say anything today? Do I let her call ME like she said to gauge her interest? Maybe call her tonight?

When would I set up date # 2 ??
 

jackhamma

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
86
Reaction score
1
Espi said:
Read the entire thread. Great info. Please confirm that I am reading it the right way.

Since I got the first kiss and it seemed like a great date she said after we kissed "I had a lot fun tonight, I will call you tomorrow." I just said "yeah I had fun to, have a good night" So its around 6pm by me now. If she does not call...do I hit her up for a second date in a few days?? Is that basically showing she has low IL if she doesn't call like she said?

So it looks better that I did NOT hit her up today right? Please advise!
 

LMFAO

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 22, 2012
Messages
760
Reaction score
40
The goal is to f*** her as soon as possible.

I would wait another day, if she initiates no contact then call her.

Invite her to some cool bar around 9pm "I heard about this cool bar..."
"Let's meet there 9pm Wednesday <bar name and address>, cool?"

Find one 10-15 minute walk from sex location.

Drink a couple of rounds, use more kino. Bring her back to your apartment and f*** her.

Once you f***** her everything changes in a girl's mind and you can start being more sweet and the relationship can begin.:up:
 

DonGorgon

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 28, 2007
Messages
4,685
Reaction score
103
Location
Studying the fact that all lies contain fragments
jackhamma said:
Met a girl a few days ago through a group of friends, we hit it off so we exchanged numbers.

Went on a first date last night and we had a great date. The entire night she was touching me a lot, flirting etc. Night ended with us making out. She is not a ho so she was not going to give it up. I am also not looking to just hit it and quit it.

After we kissed she said "I had a great time, I'll call you tomorrow"

I am not good with what to do after the first date. Do I say anything today? Do I let her call ME like she said to gauge her interest? Maybe call her tonight?

When would I set up date # 2 ??
if you did not F close it was not a great date,..... she left you and got Fed hard by one of her regular buddies
 

Harry Wilmington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2012
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
204
jackhamma said:
Went on a first date last night and we had a great date. The entire night she was touching me a lot, flirting etc. Night ended with us making out. She is not a ho so she was not going to give it up. I am also not looking to just hit it and quit it. After we kissed she said "I had a great time, I'll call you tomorrow"
Great job so far, especially with the making out at the end. So far, you're doing the right things.

Because she made out with you so soon, there's going to be questions on her end - at least initially - if she "moved too fast." This feeling will be heightened if you contact her too soon after the date because then the questions she has about things moving too soon will be confirmed. HOWEVER... if you wait a few days, the questions in her head will go from "did I move too fast" to " did I do enough to show him that I liked him?" It's the mind frame you want her to be in that will allow you to get a "yes" for that second date without hesitation, and maybe possibly even go all the way on said date.

I can't speak for others on here, but here's what's worked for me time and time again:

1. If you took her out last night, wait at least 4 days to call her. Usually when I put it in my brain to wait that long, I end up getting contacted by the girl on day 3. The reason I wait 4 days is a psychological mind trick: most women assume a guy will call within 3 days to ask her out again. So, when you do NOT do that, she starts to believe she must have done something to make you uninterested. Or you may be out with another girl. Or a bunch of other scenarios she has in her head. The point is, not hearing from you by day 3 will make her think she's lost you forever. So, when you hit her up on day 4, she's so surprised and excited that she didn't ruin her chance with you (again, different mind set from you begging her to hang out again), that she'll be willing to do just about anything you suggest.

2. When you hit her up (which would be Thursday), see what her response is. If she starts arguing and complaining about how long she had to wait to hear from you again, get rid of her - you don't need a complainer, and making her wait to hear from you is a good way to test this out. However, assuming she has a good head on her shoulders and is sane, she'll just be happy to hear from you.

3. Ask her out for any day of the week other than Friday or Saturday. Psychologically, those days are reserved for couples, and you two aren't at that point yet... which, again, will help her to not feel as though things between the two of you are being rushed. Anyway... if you call her on Thursday, ask her out again for Monday or Tuesday. Have a place already picked out, as well as the time. If she says she can't do it on the day and time you suggest, wait to see if she counter-offers with her own date and time.

4. Once you set the date, time, and whether you're going to pick her up or not, GO GHOST AGAIN UNTIL THE DAY OF THE DATE. No texting her, no calling her, just show up at the time and place agreed upon.

5. Repeat these steps for 3 months until she becomes the girlfriend :)

If you follow these instructions (and remember not to be too verbal about things like feelings or seeing her more than twice a week), you'll be able to keep her around for a long time. Hope this helps!
 

Well I'm here to tell you there is such a magic wand. Something that will make you almost completely irresistible to any woman you "point it" at. Something guaranteed to fill your life with love, romance, and excitement.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

jackhamma

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
86
Reaction score
1
Harry Wilmington said:
Great job so far, especially with the making out at the end. So far, you're doing the right things.

Because she made out with you so soon, there's going to be questions on her end - at least initially - if she "moved too fast." This feeling will be heightened if you contact her too soon after the date because then the questions she has about things moving too soon will be confirmed. HOWEVER... if you wait a few days, the questions in her head will go from "did I move too fast" to " did I do enough to show him that I liked him?" It's the mind frame you want her to be in that will allow you to get a "yes" for that second date without hesitation, and maybe possibly even go all the way on said date.

I can't speak for others on here, but here's what's worked for me time and time again:

1. If you took her out last night, wait at least 4 days to call her. Usually when I put it in my brain to wait that long, I end up getting contacted by the girl on day 3. The reason I wait 4 days is a psychological mind trick: most women assume a guy will call within 3 days to ask her out again. So, when you do NOT do that, she starts to believe she must have done something to make you uninterested. Or you may be out with another girl. Or a bunch of other scenarios she has in her head. The point is, not hearing from you by day 3 will make her think she's lost you forever. So, when you hit her up on day 4, she's so surprised and excited that she didn't ruin her chance with you (again, different mind set from you begging her to hang out again), that she'll be willing to do just about anything you suggest.

2. When you hit her up (which would be Thursday), see what her response is. If she starts arguing and complaining about how long she had to wait to hear from you again, get rid of her - you don't need a complainer, and making her wait to hear from you is a good way to test this out. However, assuming she has a good head on her shoulders and is sane, she'll just be happy to hear from you.

3. Ask her out for any day of the week other than Friday or Saturday. Psychologically, those days are reserved for couples, and you two aren't at that point yet... which, again, will help her to not feel as though things between the two of you are being rushed. Anyway... if you call her on Thursday, ask her out again for Monday or Tuesday. Have a place already picked out, as well as the time. If she says she can't do it on the day and time you suggest, wait to see if she counter-offers with her own date and time.

4. Once you set the date, time, and whether you're going to pick her up or not, GO GHOST AGAIN UNTIL THE DAY OF THE DATE. No texting her, no calling her, just show up at the time and place agreed upon.

5. Repeat these steps for 3 months until she becomes the girlfriend :)

If you follow these instructions (and remember not to be too verbal about things like feelings or seeing her more than twice a week), you'll be able to keep her around for a long time. Hope this helps!
Great info, thank you for the detailed guidance. You and Epsi have given me solid advice for this situation and really any future situation I should follow this same process.

Question's for you Harry

1) From personal experience when you do decide its time to call for date #2 what time do you usually call at? I figure after dinner but before 9pm would be an appropriate time and best chance for her to answer. What do you think?

2) Also if you call her, and she does not answer. Is it better to leave a voicemail or usually I follow right up with a text. Whats your method? What do you say if you leave a voicemail/text?

3) If she says she is busy on said date and does NOT offer a counter, what do I do?
 

Harry Wilmington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2012
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
204
Glad I could be of help! Here are the answers to your questions:

1. When I call for date number 2, I usually try to call her at a time when I don't think she'll pick up. In this instance, I don't leave a message of any kind - everybody's phone these days can usually detect a missed call, so if I call her and she misses it, she'll know you called. I do this, in part, to test HER interest: if I call and she misses it and she calls me back, it means her interest is moderate to high. If she sees it and doesn't call me back, or waits until the next day to call, her interest is low. With that said: any time between 10 AM and 10 PM is usually pretty good. Some guys call earlier or later than that, but as a kid my parents drilled into my head that most people don't want calls before or after these hours unless they're already planning to go out. Ideally, you'll catch her before she's getting tired and ready to go to bed, so the earlier the better.

If I call her and she DOES answer, I keep it pretty short:

ME: (Being flirty) "heeeeey there, what's going on (name)?"
HER: "Oh, nothing, how have you been?"
ME: I'm doing good, keeping myself busy, how about yourself?
HER: Oh, about the same - what's up?
ME: Well, I didn't want to take up too much time - I'm about to go do (insert name of activity: work out, handle some business, etc - this way, it gives you an excuse not to be on the phone for too long), but I found this fun (insert: activity, restaurant, movie, etc) I wanted to check out on Monday or Tuesday and was hoping I could take you with me.

From here, you'll either get an enthusiastic "I'd love to go!" Or, you'll get an excuse. Assuming it's a positive answer, set up the date and time you're going to meet/pick her up, then say "Great, i'll see you on (insert day you agreed on) at (time agreed on)." Then, you don't talk to her again until you pick her up for the date. Simple stuff, maaaaan!

2. If I call and she doesn't answer, I usually just let it go and wait for her to call me back. I don't feel the need to text her because I just called, and texting her right after I called seems like needy behavior. I trust the process, which is that if she's interested, she'll see the missed call and call back. I have yet to have a woman that's highly interested in me not call me back if she missed my call. I don't leave voice messages until after I've made her the girlfriend - and even then, I find most people don't check their messages like that, they just see my number and call me.

3. If she says she is busy on said date and does not offer a counter offer... neither do you. So, for example:

YOU: Hey, so I was thinking we could go out to this new restaurant on Monday or Tuesday at 7, which day works best for you?
HER: Oh, um, I can't make it on those days, I'll be catching up on some work.
YOU: Oh... okay...
HER: Yeah, sorry...

Notice she's not leaving a counter-offer. What most guys in this scenario would do is try to throw other dates and times at her - this, however, can also come across as very needy, and it makes you appear like a man with no other options. So, if she doesn't offer up another day and time that would work for her, just say "alright, well I'll talk to you later" and hang up.

Now, at this point in the game, I typically just let it go. Why? Because I've dated enough women to know that the TRULY INTERESTED ONES WILL GIVE A COUNTER-OFFER. They can't not do it - if they feel you may be the love of their life, they're going to want to find time to spend with you; and, if it's not on the days you suggested, they will make it known what days they can make time to see you.

With that said: for newbies in the game that are needing more proof of her disinterest, I tell them to wait a week, call her again and ask her for another date. If she gives you more excuses without counter-offers, she's definitely not interested. If this happens, though, don't take it personally: sometimes you can have a great first-date with a woman, and she can end up changing her mind about you once it's over. So far, though, you're off to a great start, so keep it up!
 

jackhamma

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
86
Reaction score
1
**update Please Help**

So just as an update I texted her today (wednesday at 1:15pm) and said:

1:15pm Me: "Hey Kelly, whats going on?" She responded in 20mins and said
1:35pm Her: "at work hi. hows your day going so far?"
I waited 1hr 20m and said
3:30pm Me: "very busy, hows yours? I want to check out xyz tomorrow night at 930pm. Would you like to join me?"

For some reason my text kept saying "not delivered"

So I resent it. Gave me the SAME message. So I sent it again and just wrote a 2nd text saying:

Me: "hey sorry if you get multiple txts, my phone has been telling me message not delivered"

It is now 6:30pm and she has not responded....

What would be my course of action if she does not respond?? She works at a doctors office...I assume she has to be out or getting out right about now...
 

ghp

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2014
Messages
23
Reaction score
2
wait and say nothing more, you should have called her. Exactly like Harry said on the post above
 

Harry Wilmington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 19, 2012
Messages
1,201
Reaction score
204
Holy crap, I totally forgot to tell you NOT to text her!

I always preach on here about how "texting KILLS relationships" (note: I'm NOT trying to turn this post into one of those text debate things), but I totally forgot about that being one of the reasons not to do it: you have a better chance of a phone call going through than a text if you're in an area with weird reception. Heck, just last week I tried sending my cousin a picture of something I saw while I was out, and she responded saying she got the pic FOUR DAYS LATER.

At this point, because of the first couple of text not being sent, you have no idea if she even saw them or not. No bueno. My suggestion? Wait til tomorrow, then CALL HER and tell her your phone was acting all weird so you decided to call and ask her to xyz place for Sunday (or that night, though I really hate asking for last minute dates). And, for future reference, CALL these girls when asking for dates. Yes, everyone likes to text these days but women who want to go out with you WILL pick up and/or call you back. Hope this helps!
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

wishyo

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 29, 2014
Messages
182
Reaction score
3
hm, weird why she didnt respond especially if uve been making out.. just wait, her move is due, u did ur part
i wouldnt wait 1:20 though just to a answer her back, girls are not stupid. they understand you might be just playing mind games.
 

jackhamma

Don Juan
Joined
May 20, 2014
Messages
86
Reaction score
1
***update***

Seems like I was premature with writing my post about her not responding:

It is truly amazing how WAITING will keep her interest up. In my past I was too over the top, talkative, flirty etc. This girl I have kept it so short and bland, not rude, but I acted as that "busy desirable man."

Last nights Text Convo From When I asked her out:

Me: I want to try another spot for drinks tomorrow night at 9:30. Would you like to join me?
Her: I'm not trying to drink that much on a hard workout routine, I can do like one drink..or better we can do dinner.
Me: Lets do dinner in (town name) Nice place to walk around afterwards too. Ill pick you up at 7pm.
Her: How about 7:30 How was your day?
Me: 730 is good. Pushing hard at work. How was yours?
Her: Okay just glad works done..
Her: mexi grill or the spot
Her: sorry I'm texting my friend lol texted u babe lol
Me: Stepping into a work dinner. See you tomorrow at 730.
Her: K
----------------------

Date #2 Tips??

My friend sent me a photo just now that said "guess who i found" it was this girl on tinder lol..she actually told me she was on there so its no surprise. Would I bring it up tonight as a joke? Or better leave it a lone?

Any tips for tonight? I am picking her up, going to dinner, and she DOES NOT have a second job to get to tonight...

I gotta nail it down....tips?
 
Last edited:
Top