had a date, kiss closed, but she pulled away on second kiss

[pete101]

i met a girl off facebook just now, first date, cool date, i took her to a rooftop of a building on campus, should have kiss closed there but missed my chance, then we walked back to the lifts i kissed her there while waiting for the lift, then i pulled away mid kiss as the lift behind us opened (i don't know why i did that, just instinct).. i think that ruined the moment for her, cos when we got into the lifts i went in for a kiss again and she kinda pulled away slightly, as in not as receptive. i tried again a couple times on the walk back to hers and she seemed more reluctant. outside hers for kiss goodbye she moved her face to the side.. but i went for the lips still. this is not good signs. i think she didn't enjoy or feel anything from the kiss.

can i recover from this some how? i'm not sure how long i should wait before i contact her again and arrange a date. maybe i shouldn't offer date straight away, and maybe 1 text of chit chat.

 

[jurry]

Yah why u kissing her so many times bro haha.. One is good on first date then u look needy if youre all over her molesting her.

Wait a few days, try again.

 

[pyros]

you're not talking about the same girl you wrote (a lot) about in a previous thread, are you?

If that is not the case, it is always the same pattern, wait a few days (2 to 4) and ask her out again. If she declines, send her to hell.
If she doesnt, once in the date, go for the kiss, if she is reluctant again, send her to hell and forget about her.

P.S.
I would not have gone so many times for the kiss, two attemps max if she rejects it.
And if she is reluctant etc, DO NOT OBSESS OVER HER, just erase her and go to do your own thing.

 

[Thorninmyside]

Your job is to make her want that kiss, not push it on her and hope she accepts it. There's escalating, and then there's a focus on your desires instead of creating hers. The head turn was the polite refusal and you stole the kiss anyway. Let's hope she's not packing pepper spray if you get a second date!

Try and date another girl before you even ask that one out for another date. I think you need a bit of a reset, otherwise you'll make the next date about "fixing" the first one. And she needs some hamster spin action because right she knows the frame is all hers.

 

[pete101]

you're not talking about the same girl you wrote (a lot) about in a previous thread, are you?

If that is not the case, it is always the same pattern, wait a few days (2 to 4) and ask her out again. If she declines, send her to hell.
If she doesnt, once in the date, go for the kiss, if she is reluctant again, send her to hell and forget about her.

P.S.
I would not have gone so many times for the kiss, two attemps max if she rejects it.
And if she is reluctant etc, DO NOT OBSESS OVER HER, just erase her and go to do your own thing.

no it's a different one, that one i had met already before, this one i met off facebook, first meet.

i should mention also she cancelled last min 2 fridays ago and didn't counter offer another time. she said twice on this date 'i came out because i cancelled last time and didn't want to do it again'

anyway, she accepted the kiss remember outside the lifts.. she wanted it.. and on the balcony terrace (i just took too long to do it) but i pulled away half way through the kiss to make sure the lift door didn't close (reallly stupid at the time) so maybe she got bad feelings from it cos i ejected.

i'll contact her like you say in the next 2-4 days, should i bother with any small chit chat or should i just ask her out directly in that first message i send?

 

[pete101]

Your job is to make her want that kiss, not push it on her and hope she accepts it. There's escalating, and then there's a focus on your desires instead of creating hers. The head turn was the polite refusal and you stole the kiss anyway. Let's hope she's not packing pepper spray if you get a second date!

Try and date another girl before you even ask that one out for another date. I think you need a bit of a reset, otherwise you'll make the next date about "fixing" the first one. And she needs some hamster spin action because right she knows the frame is all hers.

yeah i hear what you're saying, she wanted it though, the first time. she cleanly accepted outside the lifts, i just ejected half way through the kiss to stop the lift door closing and maybe she got bad feelings from it.. cos when we got into the lift and i tried again she was reluctant so obviously it was a bad kiss to her. or maybe she doesn't have 'feelings' dont women use the first kiss as a measure of how things will be in future?

i think that's my answer..

 

[Great being a man]

You're too into her..........get out more, meet more girls.

If you knew 5 other girls you wouldn't care less about how she reacted to a kiss

Develop an abundance mindset with women.........stop trying to figure out what their actions mean

Let them start worrying about what YOUR actions mean

best of luck

 

[pyros]

you dont need to have chitchat in the meanwhile. But, once you text her to ask her out, BEFORE YOU DO IT, you ask her how she's been doing etc, have a small conversation, and then if she seems happy etc, you ask her out.

Do not ask her out directly without a small conversation first. I mean, dont do this:

you: hey whats up?
her: hi, nothing much? you?
you: doing X, wanna go out saturday night?

WRONG.

Build a bit of rapport first.
But I would not be optimistic since she did not seem to enjoy your kiss attempts.