Gym sarges go awry

[apua2006]

OK, I tried chatting up two girls at the gym this past week. These conversations didn't go as well as I'd hoped. Give me some pointers on how to improve.


First Girl:

The first girl was on an exercise bike next to me. She began adjusting the bike, pushing it around. I asked her if she needed any help. She barely looks at me. She was completely stone faced. I then kept talking to her some more: 'oh ok, it looked like you needed some help there.' She became a bit more receptive, cracking a slight smile, then apparently suppressing it, returning to her stone faced visage. I just gave up at this point, since she seemed so frosty.


Second Girl:

The second girl was actually a girl I had seen at a local bar. My friend and I chatted with her and her friend for a little bit almost two months ago. This girl said her friend looked like celeb nicole richie when we were all at the bar (total bs).

So when I saw her at the gym, I said:

apua: excuse me can I ask you a question?'
She looked at me and she was silent so I asked. She had a slight nervous look or grimace, I couldn't tell.

I asked her if she had been to bar such and such. She said she'd been there a couple of times, but hadn't been there in a while.

I asked if she had a tall friend who was with her. She said, 'well I have a lot of tall friends...' almost rolling her eyes.

I then said she said her friend looked like nicole richie. At this point, she flashes a big smile, her eyes light up and she says 'oh yeah! That was like two months ago.'

I said 'really? has it been that long?'

She said 'yeah, I remember it was just before june....you have a good memory,' she says, teasing me.

I keep talking to her about the bar and whatnot. I ask her if it gets busy there during the summer, how often she goes there, just random fluff. She begins to lose interest, i.e., looking around, giving one word answers. I just stop talking to her and get back to my workout.

How do I improve? I admit, I was a bit nervous opening the second girl. I was a bit more relaxed talking to the first girl.

 

[Latinoman]

Give me some pointers on how to improve.

1- Go to the gym to WORK OUT.
2- Don't sarge in the gym.
3- Women go to the gym to work out too (and many take their work out VERY serious), show some respect for them and their space.

If you go to the gym to "sarge", then you are NOT improving the most important thing: your fitness and health.

I personally don't understand how a man goes to the gym and waste his time "sarging"...when he should be focusing on his work out.

 

[drZaius09]

The gym is an ideal place to sarge. Don't worry about respecting a woman's time or disrupting her workout.

Yeah, because they're not human beings who deserve respect like you or I, right? After all, finding a piece of trim for yourself is a far more urgent issue than anything else a woman could possibly have going on.

Disrupting a woman's time can be applied in every potential sargeing opportunity, so i don't exempt the gym.

It is inappropriate to be "sarging" (or whatever you want to call it) in any situation where you are disrupting someone's time against their will. Do you think it's acceptable that a woman should be HARRASSED every time she steps outside her house to work-out, or buy food, or fill her gas tank? This is why they are so cold and hostile to begin with: BECAUSE YOU WON'T LEAVE THEM ALONE!

You can find ways to meet women without accosting them in every imaginable public arena. I've said this before: Some of you guys need to find a hobby and quit tugging at your nuts all day.

 

[Latinoman]

Latinoman, I respect your posts, but I disagree with this one.

Thanks and I appreciate that.

The gym is an ideal place to sarge. Don't worry about respecting a woman's time or disrupting her workout. Seize the moment.

Disrupting a woman's time can be applied in every potential sargeing opportunity, so i don't exempt the gym.

I was married for many years. One thing I learned while I was marriage was to listen to my ex- and her friends talk about things such as the gym. Also I listened to many co-workers and former co-workers talk about their work out, etc.

When women go to the gym, they do that because they have some SERIOUS issues about their appearances or HAD some SERIOUS issues about their apperance in the past. It is a VERY VERY important thing for them.

If you disrupt or interrupt a woman from buying food or getting a drink or reading the newspaper, they can always regroup. When you interrupt them from doing their work out, they find that annoying and disrespectful. Furthermore, they don't feel "pretty" (sweating, no make up, etc.). It is a woman's psychological thing (if she is wearing lot of make up and lot of perfume, then she is probably there to get 'hit').

All that said, if you go to the gym and you happen to meet a woman that INITIATES by keeping constant contact or smiling...you can then throw a hook and see if she can be fished. If you initiate the contact and fail (and trust me EVERYBODY will know, because people are always watching)...you will look like one of those desperate men that go to the gym trying to get laid, instead of working on himself.

The thing is...there is a HUGE lack of compability from a woman that goes to the gym to work in her health and fitness vs. a man that goes to the gym to "sarge". One is trying to get fit and healthy (a HUGE GOAL) and the other is trying to sarge.

Going to the gym for the purpose of "sarging" is NOT appropriate and I personally don't recommend it.

If you approach the woman outside the gym...then that's cool. Heck, if you see her at the store or the nightclub and bring the fact that you have seeing her at the gym...that's very cool.

I met a woman couple years ago...the first thing she told me was, "You go to the gym that I go" (I don't remember seeing her there).

 

[LIME!]

I would love to sarge in the gym. I'm a 250 lb man. The gym is one of the places where I can "display excellence" as Tao of Steve puts it. In most places I'm just a lummox who is a bit too big for his surroundings, but in the gym, I'm the scary m/f you all watch to see if he drops a huge a$$ weight on his chest. Arrogant college and hs jocks move aside for me as I walk to the water fountain. I get the "nod" from most of them. They ask about technique, ask what "supplements" I use and how to get them (sorry, just creatine :moon.

The problem is not that girls don't want to be bothered. Sometimes girls will smile at me and say hi or whatever, but I'm just thinking about the next set, how much I'm going to lift and how awesome that's going to be.

I'm just not in the girl zone while I'm lifting.

 

[drZaius09]

Don't worry about respecting a woman's time...

I didn't accuse you of disrespecting women, you did so yourself.

And as much as I'd love to go on the defensive and "prove" to you how versed I am in the nature of seducing women, I don't owe that to you or anyone else here. I've paid my dues, I've made all the mistakes, and I've become very adept at getting women into my bed. Some of that skill resulted from the careful implementation of info on this board, and some came from my own experiences. One thing that was never sacrificed was the principle of common courtesy. I dont have to harass women in the streets to get laid. If that works for you, have fun. But people who come here for help deserve to hear arguments from any possible angle which may be helpful.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

1- Go to the gym to WORK OUT.
2- Don't sarge in the gym.
3- Women go to the gym to work out too (and many take their work out VERY serious), show some respect for them and their space.

If you go to the gym to "sarge", then you are NOT improving the most important thing: your fitness and health.

I personally don't understand how a man goes to the gym and waste his time "sarging"...when he should be focusing on his work out.

I agree. The only time I would sarge at a gym is if we were both leaving.

 

[Latinoman]

I agree. The only time I would sarge at a gym is if we were both leaving.

 

[realsmoothie]

Women are definitely very focused at the gym.

But sometimes I have seen them throw out some very obvious IOI's at me. Not sure why... it seems like they KNOW that most girls at the gym are "frosty" and need to be more obvious.

 

[niceguydying]

I would only sarge at the gym if I had many IOIs because when I am there I am focused. I saw my next door neighbor at the gym the other day and she is pretty hot. She noticed me first and was trying to talk to me as I worked out and it kind of bothered me. I am sure some women would feel the same way to a stronger degree if some unknown dude was interfering w/ their workout.

But remember I said if her interest level seemed more on me than her workout I would engage.

 

[Latinoman]

By the way guys...I know there some that go to the gym to get men's attention.

They are very obvious. Even my girlfriend and other female friends have commented on those women: "Those two came to the gym trying to get men".

I typically (acting innocent) ask, "How can you possibly know that?"

One response was the: "For starters, they are not too focused on their excercise. Second, they are three of them (could be a pair of women) joking around...and third, look at their hair (loose, not tied in a bun, playfull, etc.)!"

And I agree too. I noticed those girls are either in the gym for what seem over one hour...or they go there for a VERY short period of time...doing literally nothing to no excercise. THOSE are the ones that you should watch...and later approach if you truly don't want to focus in your fitness.

I still insist on you focusing on your fitness and when you finish your work out...approach them (if they are like those women) or wait outside to do the approach (if she is focus on her fitness).

 

[Latinoman]

I would only sarge at the gym if I had many IOIs because when I am there I am focused. I saw my next door neighbor at the gym the other day and she is pretty hot. She noticed me first and was trying to talk to me as I worked out and it kind of bothered me. I am sure some women would feel the same way to a stronger degree if some unknown dude was interfering w/ their workout.

But remember I said if her interest level seemed more on me than her workout I would engage.

I have seen females/males that I know due to work or networking and some are in the gym. It bothers me too, when they try to give me conversation. Especially if I'm very focused in my workout and the conversation last more than several seconds.

 

[SoCalMike]

depends..

Feel out the situation. Like the other poster said if the girl is making eye contact, smiling, etc. I'd go for it. If you're next to a cute girl on the treadmills, I'd at least try and chat her up a bit.

I had a girl approach ME at the gym once. We ended up chatting for a while, and I got her number and we went on a couple dates.

I say keep all your options open.

 

[niceguydying]

I thought about this after reading through the thread. Just the other day an attrative HB 7.5 gave me a nice a$$ smile at the gym and I went out like a punk!! I felt like a Punk for a minute, but she caught me when I was just finishing my arms and had a pretty hard workout that day. That made me feel better about going out like a punk. If I had it to over again, I would have attempted a sarge. ONLY because her interest level seemed high and she was walking through the gym and not actually working out.

On the same token, if a Hottie would interrupt my working by showing interest I would certainly let her flow and go with it. I have standards too, but if some huge chick would do that I would be pissed.

 

[bigmil]

1- Go to the gym to WORK OUT.
2- Don't sarge in the gym.
3- Women go to the gym to work out too (and many take their work out VERY serious), show some respect for them and their space.

I completely agree. Women don't want to be hit on at the gym. They want to workout and thats what you're there for too. My ex-gf always went to a girls-only gym because she felt uncomfortable when guys would gawk at her or try to pick her up at World's.

 

[Phyzzle]

It's a numbers game. Maybe you could have approached at a better moment, later in the day, but most women aren't gonna like you, period.

Are any women out there sick of being approached by guys?

If so, START APPROACHING US, so we don't have to bother you!

 

[Latinoman]

Fellas, I'm shocked that so many of you are worried about wasting a woman's time. I really invite you to consider the AFC-based mentality of that. OK; let me re-phrase. I'm not saying you're AFC, but I am saying that's very non-PUA type thinking.

From my perspective...my point is that you (men in general) are not wasting THEIR (women) time...my point is that you (men in general) are wasting YOURS.

An AFC would neglect his well being (physical and health) in order to focus on women. And that's my point. The gym is a place were we should go and better ourselves physically.

Furthermore, if we add the fact that the success rate there is low (women want to better themselves too, that's why instead of spending $$$ and time in shopping, they spent both at the gym), then why even waste YOUR time, when you can focus on performing a proper work out regime and on getting fit and healthy?

Going to do the gym is not going to make you fit or healthy. Doing a proper workout regime will do the trick (combined with diet).

If men feel the urge...then wait until both either finish the work out or are out of the gym. That's my point.

 

[Latinoman]

and her myspace.

There is your answer. She is a woman that likes (or wants) to phuck.

 

[Latinoman]

I live in a relatively big city...so, there are several gyms. One was a female only gym. Eventually and due to bad management, it closed. However, my gym honored the women's one year membership and now they are part of our gym.

We have so many attractive women in our gym, that is now a norm to see attractive women. Heck, most of our personal trainers are fit women. Most of the men go to work out. Same with most of the women. Many even compete (real competitions) and go to my gym to train. A handful go there to waste their time...and then they quickly feel they are at the wrong place and quickly leave.

From my perspective...I have a very busy schedule. Therefore, I cannot afford to use my workout schedule to do nothing other than working out. So, I made sure I go to the gym and I do my 40 minutes work out with my 30 or so minutes of cardio. I do squats and dead lifts, so I truly have to take my work out serious to avoid injury.


If I don't follow a straight regime...then I will be wasting my time. If that's the case, then I rather use that time to do something better...such as phucking my girlfriend. But the fact is...I MUST work out to keep an athletic body. Specially now in my upper 30s. The people in my gym are very intense. Furthermore, the membership is NOT that cheap either. Nobody pays $60-70+ per month to waste their time.

 

[drZaius09]

There is your answer. She is a woman that likes (or wants) to phuck.

I think what you meant to say was, she is a woman that likes (or wants) ATTENTION. Lots and lots of attention.