Hi, long-time lurking, first-time posting.
I've been thinking a lot about what women really want, and I remember a post on another thread, I think from Pook about how we should live lives where we work to improve ourselves and I really agree with that.
I'm 23 and a student in south England, about to graduate this summer, and I've dated some really great women and have had three semi-serious girlfriends so far. I was abroad last year in Sweden studying and I got so many phone numbers, dates and interest partly because I was an Englishman which was a lot of fun. I had so much fun, I'm planning on returning to that same university to take my master's course in about a year's time (after a year of working and travelling first). I ended up being with a pretty serious girlfriend for a few months, she was absolute beautiful - blonde, 24, fit and with a twin sister
- and we got on really well as people, she was great fun to talk to and just to be with.
She and I broke up however, mainly because I was going back to England, and it's left me in a down stretch since coming back, and I think women have been very perceptive and picked up on that, so I think that being happy in yourself makes you attractive - not just a sexual way, but also in a general way with people wanting to spend time with you. I have had some really good dates this year and quite a lot of interest, most recently a pretty girl at the gym who it turned out we shared lots of mutual friends, she and I exchanged phone numbers and went for a drink, but I decided I wasn't looking for more than friendship with her. One of my flatmates has taken to calling me 'Tim Juan'
I'm in my fourth year at uni. In my second year I worked out quite a lot (don't work out as much at the moment as I should do though), so I was about 6'2 and fairly good build and I had a really great girlfriend at that time. She was 19, tall, slim, charismatic and really great to be with, and she was my first, and I still think of her quite a lot. She and I broke up because we had really different ideas about life, though we were still friendly and kept in contact. I actually broke up with her, to the astonishment of my friends, because I didn't want to live how I didn't want to live.
I want to live in a way where I can live with myself, and part of that is what I think about women. I've had the opportunity to sleep with many girls but what I'm looking for is a classy lady. I've also been very much brought up with the idea that a proof of a man's masculinity is not in how many women he sleeps with but in how well he treats his woman. Feel free to disagree, but that's what I've grown up with and that's how I want to live my life.
Another thing I've learnt is how important it is to have interests in your life. I have problems sometimes with personal relationships, partly because my folks long thought I was borderline autistic, so in order to counter this I take time to get involved with things. Both at uni and outside I've tried loads of different things, from acting to having my own radio show on the campus station, from ballroom dancing (lots of girls there!) to martial arts such as Tae Kwon Do and Fencing (western swordfighting), which has helped my coordination and agility a lot.
So, at the end of all this, I think women can be attracted to superficial things such as appearance, but the women worth hanging onto will be attracted to those men who do stuff and look at life not as something to be endured but as an adventure and face that adventure with confidence and a sense of fun.
Pax,
OffCentreView