Guess whoose coming to dinner...

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I don't have to defend my girl's actions. she didn't do **** wrong but come to me.



There isn't a sane person here that would blame her for what... what the **** did she honeslty do wrong but follow me half way across the country to tell my parents I was going to be a father?

What?



what the **** do you know about how my girl handles stressful situtations? I see her damn near every day, you have never seen her in your life, yet you know her better than I do.

Hell let's say she coudln't handle stressful situtations veyr well.. What then? I'm not going to leave her because she doesn't deal with stress very well.. if it was EXTREME maybe but **** no one is perfect

you are posting **** just to be posting ****. it makes no sense.



my life is a rollarcoaster regardless of who is in it

I'm going to show you how much sense this makes. Everyone wants me to go and **** my old oneitis, who is the most unstable person I know, and for whatever reason, wants me to leave the girl I'm with and I am really liking, who is one of the most headstrong women I know, isnt' afraid of hard work,e tc...

the only reason is because she is older than me. it's what everyone has an issue about but wont' come out and just say. people who dont' know me would rathe rme be miserable with a girl 3 monts younger than me than be happy as can be, and I'm having the time of my life right now, wit a woman 8 years older than I am, because they know so damn much mnore about me than I do and what I want.

and when is the last time you posted anythhing about you here? Only someone who has an issue and is an armchair DJ could turn my mom busting on my GF in front of 9 people into something my GF did wrong.

Two things:

1. Sure you're not defending her
2. I don't post about my life because its boring in comparison to someone's like yours. I'm in control of it, I choose not to ride rollercoasters.

 

[6-heads lewis]

So my mother, being the sarcastic ******* she is, kinda addresses the 400 pound goirilla in the room and makes a subtle attack at her

i dont understand this, is it an expression?

she claims to be a christian but acts noting liek it, she gossips about everythhing, all she cares about is how she is precieved by others. The only thihng she was thinking is "I can't bring a 32 year old white woman to my southern Blaptist all black church with my 24 year old son".

most mothers seem to have this in some way, especially small-towners. with such a huge support system of like minded people (church, neighbours, family, etc), she'll always have someone to assure her she's right and you're wrong, and that the Bible said blah blah blah. my mother is from some obscure village, my father is from a major city, they've been in a zillion arguments about her judgemental and opressing behaviour, it never changes.

ditty about the 'centre of attention' thing.

i am younger and less experienced than you, so im not trying to give advice, but i have a similar mother. the only thing that has worked is to ignore unjust and controlling comments, answer calmly and even laugh off their criticism. people like this enjoy conflict, attention and above all emotion. give no attention and show no emotion, they will eventually shut up.

when it goes too far, then you yell back, and HARD. constant arguing goes nowhere, a well-placed and frightening tirade creates boundaries. the worst part is when they throw the guilt trip on you, or start crying, or start talking bs to play the victim.

in fact she was probably breathing a sigh of relife that her son isn't a homo.

my mother is constantly asking me if i have a gf, she thinks im gay. my current girlfriend charges 140/hour, should i bring her over for dinner?

 

[iqqi]

my mother is constantly asking me if i have a gf, she thinks im gay. my current girlfriend charges 140/hour, should i bring her over for dinner?

LOL, no! Especially if there is a surprise pregnancy, Mr. Lewis! What are you trying to do, create drama or something???

 

[Last Man Standing]

BB, you are part white so it is not an issue of race! Your mother is right - as I stated a few months ago - she is too old for you! But your mother should have not been so abrupt in her condemnation in front of her and your guests. your mother is in sync with the rhythm of truth - you just don't realize it yet. Do you love your girl or is it that she has like interests as you?

She should not have said she was pregnant - that was your job!!!!

Someone is passing your girl's pic as "his" girl on Sosuave - I believe - did you see?

 

[backbreaker]

I'm 1/4th... and you are making me explain alot more than I wanted to explain in this thread

BTW Great to see you LMS.. i was getting worried about you for a mintue there

My mom has only seen her REAL dad 1 time in her life. he was an ******* jerk. so although she is mixed, and I'm by default 1/4th.... she's "black" if that makes any sense. If i saw my granddad right now I wouldnt' know who he was.

which probably added more fuel to the fire.

which probably I should have known better than to bring her, but than on the same note, why should I have to "know better" than to let my mom meet the mother of her first grandchild?

Someone is passing your girl's pic as "his" girl on Sosuave - I believe - did you see?

not really and I don't care. I take that as a compliment.

she is too old for you! /QUOTE]

that's an opinion. it's not a law. it's Her opinion. It's not mine. I'm a grown ass man. I've made it this far witout her help.. without **** from her. I sure as hell don't need her opinion now.

your mother is in sync with the rhythm of truth

My mom is a lying shallow drama christain wanna be drama queen

She should not have said she was pregnant - that was your job!!!!

man... thoose cheedar biscuits.. what can I say. they make you do things you dont' normally do.

i was thinking the whole time there about the boondocks and just laughing to myself at the biscuits

hen it goes too far, then you yell back, and HARD. constant arguing goes nowhere, a well-placed and frightening tirade creates boundaries. the worst part is when they throw the guilt trip on you, or start crying, or start talking bs to play the victim.

although I don't like her veyr much, I respect my parents. Id on't yell at them. never have and never will. I just don't talk to them.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Your whole situation is convoluted - the natural path is that your parents would know who their son is pursuing for a mother of his child - his wife. But, the "times" being as they are, shyt is so backwards that drama and conflict is the result! I can write a thousands words to expound on this, but I won't!

I know that you DON'T believe in God and that your mother DOES - so this will cause strife regardless of who you impregnated! You have philosophical/religious differences - so you will never be in full agreement with her.

A dinner to introduce the mother of your child is the worst thing you could have done! This required personal human contact and not a group setting! Common sense, for an older man.

The most disturbing thing of this is that your seven year old sister surmised that you were having sex!!! What a tragedy!! What a tragedy!! what the hell does a 7 yr old know about sexuality - the fact that she knows tells us that we have reached rock bottom!!!

 

[backbreaker]

A dinner to introduce the mother of your child is the worst thing you could have done! This required personal human contact and not a group setting! Common sense, for an older man.

I don't know about worst thing... I had basically 1 night in little rock and I had to tell 10 people.

 

[iqqi]

A dinner to introduce the mother of your child is the worst thing you could have done! This required personal human contact and not a group setting! Common sense, for an older man.

Exactly my point.

Now add to that a bunch of sad little siblings, a narrowminded estranged mom, a drama-king BB, and an emotional much older pregnant white woman...

??

Is this the 07 remake of "Clueless"?

 

[penkitten]

well you cant take it back, its already done.
all you can do is strive to move past it.
sometimes we must be the first to forgive in order to resolve issues.
this day in age, no one should be surprized when they hear that someone is going to give birth to a child of mixed race. mixing races, can make future generations healthier because it breeds out bad genes such as sickle cell.
if your mother calls and says anything, tell her she will love her mochacina bambino grand baby and to just wait and see

 

[iqqi]

if your mother calls and says anything, tell her she will love her mochacina bambino grand baby and to just wait and see

(Iqqi pretending to be BB: )

My mama aint gon see my baba cuz she is a lying *****, and i don't need her forcing her stupid hick values on my child!

Just kidding BB. I kid! I kid!

 

[backbreaker]

breeds out bad genes such as sickle cell.

which I have

 

[Last Man Standing]

Here is my point - giving life to a life-form is no longer a sacred blessed thing - it has become a matter of happenstance!!! The reality is that the girl and her offspring is now family!!

Call me crazy, but if I'm the grand-parent then I would like to know who is the progenitor of my genes!! What kind of person is responsible for the care-taking of my seed that I created?? I would like to know this!! Is she/he to be trusted with such a grave responsibility?This is a normal concern, and it is done out of love for the child and not for chastisement of the mother!

 

[backbreaker]

i can give you my mom's cell phone, please tell her that.. i'm done trying to be rational and think for everyone. i tried. I flew half way across the country to try.

 

[penkitten]

backbreaker, we all admire and respect you here and wish nothing but the best for you.
your family will have to come to terms of this because they will want to know this baby. this baby will be important to them.
your mother will love her grandchild even if it does have whiter skin that she wanted. i understand that because her white father left her that she just associates white with being left behind when it comes to color.

as far as mother in law/ daughter in law relationships... they take time to create and build.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Here is my point - giving life to a life-form is no longer a sacred blessed thing - it has become a matter of happenstance!!!

So true. You seldom hear about couples who've been together "trying" to have a baby anymore. It's becoming more and more common that parents and siblings meet their family member's partner until pregnancy come up. You have to admit that a bit shocking to the family if they had never heard about the person who's bringing an addition into the family, especially if its lobbed into their laps like a grenade.

 

[backbreaker]

So true. You seldom hear about couples who've been together "trying" to have a baby anymore. It's becoming more and more common that parents and siblings meet their family member's partner until pregnancy come up. You have to admit that a bit shocking to the family if they had never heard about the person who's bringing an addition into the family, especially if its lobbed into their laps like a grenade.

first of all, you are assuming that my family is right down the street and I am just advoiding them

I live in California and tey live in arkansas.

I dont' talk to my family. We've been through some **** and my life is better when they are not in it. I've told my GF that at least 20 times, but she insisted that they should know, because it's the "right thing to do", but no one cares to stop and realize that I've been dealing with my family for almost 25 years now, I know them, and there is a very valid reason I dont' want to talk to them, and she saw for herslef when she left red lobster sobbing.

If it were up to me, **** em.. I wouldn' thave told them. Because nothing I ever do is positive to them, or good. When I make some money, they have their hands out, go get more people to get their hands out utnil I say no then they ***** me out and throw the whole "woe is me" party on me. when I was broke, it was "you suck you *******, you need to be like your younger couson who is in the army with 3 kids"

So why bother? Not one ****ing time in my life has anyone there been there for me, not ONCE, and I'm sick and ****ing tired of having pepole that come from these picture perfect families that actually gvie 2 ****s trying to tell me that I'm a trtoubled soul.

Hell, given what I've been though I think I'm pretty freakin normal. I just don't talk to them. out of sight out of mind.

No one called me and apologied ofr making my GF cry. no one apologied to her. yet i'm wrong. I'm sick of tem and my decision is made, they can all, every last one of tem, can kiss my black ass

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

first of all, you are assuming that my family is right down the street and I am just advoiding them

Actually it never came into my mind. But it's interesting that you brought up the thing about distance and avoidance.

 

[backbreaker]

your damn right. I have had the clearest mind, I've made more money than I have in any year this year, not having to deal with my family.

My grandmother dates a crackhed, gives him all her money, then gets mad at me wheN i won't give her anymore.. but I'm wrong for not talking to her

My mom kicked me out the house because I wanted to start a company, then busts out my GF/Baby moma because she's white and not my age, and it's my fault

My dad is pissy because I won't pay for my little brothers college, TE ENTIRE THING.. no. that's a moral decision. he's smart he needs to earn it himself. I dont' believe in handouts. I didn't have any. if you want something bad enough you will get it. YOu wren't pissy at anyone when I needed someting and you coudlnt' do it. But it's My fault

eveyrtihng is my ****ing fault. let it be. if it's my fault, then it's my fault, but it's going to be my fault, whiel I'm at pecie, half way across the country pursing a dream. I'm done

 

[Ken785]

BB..do you have any pics of your Aston Martin???

 

[backbreaker]

damn that came from left field. I sold it about a week and a half ago, and I'm not in cali anyway, but I do have a pic of it and I'll upload it when I get back