Gotten few minutes ago a mental breakdown... Need battleplan for future.

ScottMustaine

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I'm surrounded by grandmother and mother putting a limit on everything I do, putting me down on anything I do. Everything I do better than someone else they seem to simply spit on it.

I can't even wash my hair without them bragging. I need to wait 2 hours or they start *****ing how I am cruel and destroying their lives and all that ****. They are so disrespectful, I was gathering money for 4 years to buy myself a decent guitar equipment and phone and new clothes ( they don't even allow me to buy myself clothes, since i have 'no taste' and know no 'fashion' . )

I must be at 11:30 at home. While all those 14 year olds are partying like crazy. They think that losing virginity at 22 is EARLY. They don't ****in' believe me when I tell them I'm the one of the guys who least goes out. They even think I'm a womanizer for having 12 girlfriends this year and breaking up because of their cheating....

At the end of this evening I exploded. Screamed the **** out of my lungs and broke a ****in' glass. This never happened. First time I actually exploded and started crying.

Whatever I do someone *****es about it and I spend more time arguing and thinking about what happened instead of PUSHING towards. I lose so much time and I feel it's running low.

Now I need your help to make a battle plan. I want to study and practise. A steady regimen.

Plan

1) I want to become better at guitar playing and show myself on TV with my friend and kick the sh1t out of those 'popular' kids who are being praised for striking three notes in a row. Every single person we asked what do they think about our 'ideas' of unfinished songs were " You guys got talent keep it up. "


2) I must finish high school and hit that stupid law university. Not because of parents. Because I have to finish it for just in case thing. And money.


3) Meet more people. I am quite popular on facebook . 2000+ friends. People start talking to me. On anonymous sites they comment how they like me, would like to meet me, and comment my looks. Almost praising. But I need the REAL DEAL.

4) Control my anger management.

5) Practise singing.




If somebody can make a schedule for me I would be grateful big time.
 
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Kbomb

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Until your financially independent there's nothing much to do. Strive to reach that independence. Use your grandmother and mother as training, use their negativity to learn how to not care what they think and how to build your self-esteem even through their barrage of ill will and negativity. Become stronger than their every attempt to bring you down. You will not be brought down.
 

ScottMustaine

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I'm feeling old. I never went to the cinema. I lied whole high school for various reasons to fathers parents to give me money so I could by myself things etc. And they all used them for 'something'.

I feel my heart and youth die in here. I mean... I never went to those clubs , parties. Just few gigs in my life and I'm about to hit 19...
 

Groovy

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Sorry to hear that mate. :( I'm one of the "online" guys that share that opinion that you're cool and good looking, haha. That what you wrote on 3), you know. Believe it or not, I admire a lot of stuff about your personality dude!! I wish there were a way to help you out, I tried to give you some advice but obviously they were crappy since they didn't help you out at all. xD By the way, I don't go on FB anymore, do you have skype or something?

My memory is failing me, have you wrote some song lyrics in the past? You could spend some time in that. I myself am thinking of starting to write poetry, I bet it must be cool for "inner game" as they call it haha.

It'd be cool if I could chat to you on skype, I am needing some help with some ****, I may post a topic about it later. Sorry for this long ass post I made you read, but hey, what are friends for?
 

ScottMustaine

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@Groovy I'll pm you with skype, but I don't use it that often. Crappy PC and it sucks much of RAM. But sure thing. :)

@PairPlus It's kinda lame looking all those pictures of 14 year olds doing all that **** and me sitting of front of PC being bullsh1tted by same old story " You will do it when you are older"

Before I hit 18 they were " Hit 18 , then do whatever you want. "


They are doing everything just to make money out of me. They don't care whether I'm happy. Whole familly thinks I will be happy when I have money...

Sure thing it's better to cry in a Ferrari than in a Renault... but you get the deal.
 

VladPatton

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Get yourself a nice Mesa/Boogie Triple Rectifier and crank away at riffs man. For me, that's the best therapy. Sometimes 3, 4, 9, 12 riffs in a row come from that which you can make into songs. Learn to record your stuff, get into your craft if you really love it.

PS: You can't let people get inside your head or you are a gonner.
 

foreverAFC

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ScottMustaine said:
I'm surrounded by grandmother and mother putting a limit on everything I do, putting me down on anything I do. Everything I do better than someone else they seem to simply spit on it.

I can't even wash my hair without them bragging. I need to wait 2 hours or they start *****ing how I am cruel and destroying their lives and all that ****. They are so disrespectful, I was gathering money for 4 years to buy myself a decent guitar equipment and phone and new clothes ( they don't even allow me to buy myself clothes, since i have 'no taste' and know no 'fashion' . )

I must be at 11:30 at home. While all those 14 year olds are partying like crazy. They think that losing virginity at 22 is EARLY. They don't ****in' believe me when I tell them I'm the one of the guys who least goes out. They even think I'm a womanizer for having 12 girlfriends this year and breaking up because of their cheating....

At the end of this evening I exploded. Screamed the **** out of my lungs and broke a ****in' glass. This never happened. First time I actually exploded and started crying.

Whatever I do someone *****es about it and I spend more time arguing and thinking about what happened instead of PUSHING towards. I lose so much time and I feel it's running low.

Now I need your help to make a battle plan. I want to study and practise. A steady regimen.

Plan

1) I want to become better at guitar playing and show myself on TV with my friend and kick the sh1t out of those 'popular' kids who are being praised for striking three notes in a row. Every single person we asked what do they think about our 'ideas' of unfinished songs were " You guys got talent keep it up. "


2) I must finish high school and hit that stupid law university. Not because of parents. Because I have to finish it for just in case thing. And money.


3) Meet more people. I am quite popular on facebook . 2000+ friends. People start talking to me. On anonymous sites they comment how they like me, would like to meet me, and comment my looks. Almost praising. But I need the REAL DEAL.

4) Control my anger management.

5) Practise singing.




If somebody can make a schedule for me I would be grateful big time.

grow the fck up, get off the computer, and pick something better than playing guuitar and wishing you were on TV to better yourself

you are a victim of being raised by women only, and thats fine but you need to realize that, and only intense weight lifting and martial arts are going to save you at this point
 

Groovy

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I agree that he could use less computer... a lot actually. But guitars are pretty cool bro and if he wants to be on TV, I agree that may be a little gay to do, and personally I would be annoyed. but on another hand it would be pretty wild for a certain period of time, you'd get a lot of attention and could make an impact, at least he would be a better role model then some gays that sing today.

How do you know he was just raised by women? That may play it's role too... But many other things are important man... lol. What if he was raised by women but spent all his time outside of the house doing exercise as you advocate?

Intense weight lifting- Careful, I guess it can tire you out, but sure, I agree, invest in exercise! Martials arts- I comment the same! What about jogging for one hour a few times a week? Experiment, do it 3 times, 4 times. Start by jogging about 30 minutes or something, the first times are the harderst.

PS- I like your nickname, foreverAFC, what about forever away from PC? loool
 

coachD

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Sounds like your mom and grandmother see the DJ in you and are jealous of losing their pride and joy to another female.
 

Down Low

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ScottMustaine said:
I'm surrounded by grandmother and mother...

4) Control my anger management.
That's how your grandmother and mother put it. In reality, you have no anger management issues. You're a young man and you're humiliated by your dependency on older adults. You should feel angry. Anger is good. Learn to trust it. When you're mad, there's usually something to be mad about. Just stop acting out by showing off your anger like a chimp. You're a man not an ape. Work out that rush of adrenaline by immediately excusing yourself to the bathroom, but really go out and take a walk. As you get older, you'll find that frequent, vigorous sex is the best way to punish a woman for her stupid mouth.

Women are always trying to tell men that "you are the problem." Don't believe it for a second. The best move you made was to come here to ask men who aren't afraid to tell you what's what.

ScottMustaine said:
2) I must finish high school and hit that stupid law university. Not because of parents. Because I have to finish it for just in case thing. And money.
Good idea. Finish high school and go to college. Community college is the cheapest and easiest way to start. Get your AA then transfer to State U for your BA. Afterwards, you can transfer to any graduate school for law or whatever. There's still time to apply for financial aid and admission to community college. If you haven't already done so, it's too late to apply for admission to four-year universities. I've been to both and there's no advantage in taking lower-division (freshman-sophomore) courses at the more expensive university. Some two-year schools actually have far superior programs, and their teachers are also part time at the nearby university, so no difference there.

It's getting damn hard to get the classes your need during registration. One tip is to enroll in anything this spring (best) or summer (might work too) so you get a higher registration priority (earlier date/time). Make sure you check out the instructors on http://www.ratemyprofessors.com/ so you don't wind up with lezbo hippos who won't give As to males.

* * * Also very important! If for any reason you think you might do poorly in one class, sign up early for credit/no credit grading option so it doesn't hurt your GPA. Then you can officially drop if you don't improve. There are financial aid and other limits on how much you can do this -- it may be better to audit a class like calculus so you can get a free trial before taking it for a letter grade. * * *

ScottMustaine said:
I was gathering money for 4 years to buy myself a decent guitar equipment and phone and new clothes...

1) I want to become better at guitar playing

5) Practise singing.
You can probably take an intro course in music theory as part of your arts requirement for college general education. Learing to play a musical instrument is actually quite gentlemanly. But I'd hardly place it as my #1 priority in life. Place to live, food to eat: these are real priorities that you don't have a handle on yet. That's why you're frustrated. You depend on others for what's really important.

ScottMustaine said:
3) Meet more people. I am quite popular on facebook . 2000+ friends. People start talking to me. On anonymous sites they comment how they like me, would like to meet me, and comment my looks. Almost praising. But I need the REAL DEAL.
Being popular on Facebook = being a disgruntled loner. Think about it. Any halfass con man in Nigeria could fake being a far, far better version of you than you could ever do by being yourself.

ScottMustaine said:
I never went to the cinema.
You didn't miss anything. Go rent a copy of A Man For All Seasons. Now that's a good movie.

ScottMustaine said:
I'm feeling old.
Oh man! If I could be 18 again!
 

ScottMustaine

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@Down Low

Today I went out and vented the hell out of me. Cycling for 4 hours. I was barely standing when I got back. Feels good.

I understood zero about university. In my country it's different. You go to 8 year school. Then 4 year ( high school / grammar school) then you got some kind of 4 year 'school' which is lower grade than Faculty/University ( which lasts 4 years).


My grandparents from dads side want to support me when it comes to finances of school etc. I guess it's fine.


What bugs me a lot is moms point of view that I'm trying to achieve social status and popularity by playing in metal bands. Rock bands are taking hike. And well, easiest way to prove myself to have TALENT is to show up on I Got Talent show. I mean, kid played Sweet Child o Mine solo and everyone is screaming for him... That solo is piece of crap to play.

If anyone heard of Yngwie Malmsteen, or Satriani or Vai. There you go. I'm technically at that level. I can play their songs. Do the crazy stuff. And it's around 1.5 years of playing. That means I got 1 MORE year to prepare myself and kick arse...


I know music theory. And I'm about extreme agression with beautiful heart shattering melodies. Imagine Pink Floyd and some Thrash/Death/Metalcore metal band.

It works for me. I can go on for 16 hours of playing without crying about anything. My errors don't bug me. It bugs those around me. I keep my sanity clear about it...


And yes, I want to become popular. All my life I've been put down by lower people just because of jealousy. Girls liked me at the start of elementary school. Other boys were jealous and would try all the time to gag me in groups because I was getting attention.


After that I lost all my confidence and will and let myself simply go with the flow. Now I seem to tap into my hidden powers I have never felt before... I am amazed what I can do with my power of will and persistence.

Also the system and moral values in my country are fcked up. Slvts and moral code is fcked up. Music propagates everything that was once spitted down upon. And there's lil of us who are playing and promoting rock and metal bands as a part of the rebellion.


There are posers as well. If you were saw those guys who look like girls with hair of a Robert Plant. Yes. We hate those guys. They are just altered version of the same scum in our country, dressed as RnR people.


Imagine the era of Glam Rock(Motley Crue ) and Thrash ( Metallica)


Our type of music when it comes to lyrics

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umeZtszNShk


Their http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXwxI8-dVdw
 

ScottMustaine

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I am in bands.

1 is a project and we are recording home songs and practising. Trying to find a proper label that won't rip us off.


2nd is in my mind. I started practising singing and growling. I want to become a frontman of my own band. Like Alexi Laiho from CoB , or Matt Tuck of BFMV.


And they stopped believing in God etc... Especially when I shown them in history books what was happening in the past in the name of "God"...
 

Bible_Belt

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What's keeping you from playing live gigs, then? Is your music not enough of a crowd-pleaser to play at a bar?

A lot of great musicians got started by giving people what they want to hear. Music can open a door to a world of fun things (like getting you laid). Or it can be a door, one you've crafted to isolate yourself.
 

ScottMustaine

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Well, first of all we're bugged down by school grades and pressure ( mental) by our parents.

Second is we can't stay up late at night. And gigs run till 2 am... My max is 11:30pm before I go. And there aint much of a crowd then...


Third is money to practise all that shyt. But not much of a problem.


Fourth is few bands tend to badmouth us and we fear ( I do) that if I get on stage will get boo-ed or won't have crowd at all...
 

Packers2010

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ScottMustaine said:
I'm feeling old. I never went to the cinema. I lied whole high school for various reasons to fathers parents to give me money so I could by myself things etc. And they all used them for 'something'.

I feel my heart and youth die in here. I mean... I never went to those clubs , parties. Just few gigs in my life and I'm about to hit 19...

dude your 19! CHILL!

i did the same as you till i was about 20..

listen, most of the top PUA coaches peaked LATE. just look at them all. brad from RSD started when he was 26!

i'm just lucky i found this **** when i was 22!

yeah.. my folks suck too. but what can you do? how about manning u and getting **** out of there.

either get a job now so you can move out, or study so you CAN move out later. it's the only way dude
 
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