Got messed around - Rebirth of a man!

[Liquid_Mind]

Hello guys, I've just joined after reading a few threads here and seeing that this is a good site for catharsis and to become reborn as a rightful human male.


I'm posting this because like many others I had an issue with a girl I met and wanted to post it as a means of burying my old afc ways into the ground. I'm sure many can relate to wanting to post out what bothers you with women but few take the advice given. I want the harshest things possible from what I post. I want you to pull no punches here. So here we go..


Bit of background info before we start: I am a 22 year old white male from the UK. I have heard of sosuave in the past but didnt really internalise any of the useful stuff here. So as of 2012 last year, I was hit with severe depression. I felt awful, like the world had no meaning. Unproductive at work, no females in my life and to top it off I got fired from a nice paying job in IT analysis because of it. I felt I had hit rock bottom. For the continuing year almost, I continued into my dark despressive state. Literally sat at home counting days that passed as I did nothing. In 2013 I decided enough was enough and to get my ass in gear. Then in July this year, I had successfully got a new job as a poker dealer and this is where it all began.

Having new passion and drive in me from getting this new job, I felt good. The first week of training was the best week I've had in my life. The work was awesome, I was having fun meeting new people and I also met (what I thought was the one) there too. So for the 5 days of training we really hit things off. On a night out that the instructor treated us to drinks with, we hit it off like a house on fire. She was cute, quiet, sweet and smart - the perfect girl in my eyes, I had never met anyone quite like her. So to top the night off I had trouble getting back home because it was so late, so she invites me back to hers infront of everybody. So I go back. We make out but we both need to be up early so we sleep in the same bed and she lets me grope her and we both fall asleep.


Next day she drives me to the station of where she lives (she lives opposite side of the city where I live) and I ask her for her number and she gives me it without a problem. "Text me" she says as I leave the car.


So all things seemed awesome from that point. I had finally become happy with my life and what I had achieved in little to no time.

Then things began to spoil....

I am not sure if It was me or anything but I began to get that dreaded attachment. I feel I did a lot wrong that lead up to it to. Texting her a lot more than she was with me. She only seemed to want to message me when she wanted something. She didnt return the affection to me. I just knew I was heading down the road to imminent failure.

I was with her at work talking with her. She kept looking at my lips as we were talking. So I decided to ask her out for a date. She declines...says shes off to see her friend.

Next day she tells me her friend fell ill as she is 7 months pregnant and had to be seen urgently and that she wont be coming into work. Asks me to look up her time to be in the next day. Day after she tells me she got offered her friends position at her work and decided to take it which means she wont be going to my work anymore.. but says we should still "catch up"

Over the next few weeks she begins getting a bit more colder and eventually she says shes off on holiday because her work hasnt got things ready for her yet. Then when she gets back we are arguing slightly about the fact she didnt return my call and that we have "our wires crossed somewhere" this kinda kept up until last week when she told me shes now off on a 6 week travelling holiday because her works equipment is now messed up and it'll be 2 months before she has a proper position.

So unsure as ti whether she was trying to lie to me I asked her out for a drink before we left as a send off. no reply on fb. even after seeing the message and replying to other people on fb.

I had had enough. I messaged her saying that I was tired of this crap and have better things to do than waste my time. I wished her a good trip and all the best in life - Luke.

She sent me the biggest text she had sent by this point about how shes done nothing wrong and im being dramatic. Then she wishes me well on my plans to open my own business and how she wants to hear more about it but "she guesses not!!" and thats the last we spoke.

I just wanted to post all this because it's being eating away at me and i can tell that unless I move on quick there will be no hope left as I sink back into depression.

Okay so lets get started,

 

[ludis]

Attention wh0res will attention wh0re.

Also, how in c0ck's name can you call someone your 'one' (even consider the possibility of it) if you haven't at least bedded her and spent some substantial time together?

 

[Greasy Pig]

Mate, you're so fvcking young!!!! The world is truly your oyster!
The biggest mistake a lot of guys make (myself definitely included) is hitching your feelings of self worth to the whims of women.
Fvck that shyt.
Keep improving yourself and working on your game. Analyse this situation and look at what worked and what didn't.
READ THE DJ BIBLE.
The hardest thing you must learn is that women will come and go in your life. I saw a funny Facebook meme which read: "It's kind of weird that every date you go on, you'll either marry that person or break up."
It's so true.
When a woman rejects you, it's her loss. By being flakey, entitled, playing games, giving mixed signals and generally just being a cvnt, she is depriving herself of the greatest gift you can give her: You.
You need to get fit, buy a new wardrobe and start using your job to build your social skills such as disarming strangers, being ****y and funny, being a fun guy women will want to hang with.
And remember you're not looking for just a woman, every interaction you have with a female is a screening process. You are the prize and you're not going to settle for anything less than a girl who would crawl over broken glass to be a part if your world.
The key is, you need to build a world that is attractive to women. That means holding down a job, looking fit and healthy, being funny and not being needy.
But don't make meeting women your sole objective. You're simply getting your shyt together and women will merely be a by-product of your life success.

 

[djdfuser]

This^. But every now and then one comes along you drop your game for. They're the ones you should be the tightest with. It's forgivable and you learn. God help you if she's a Cluster B(omb). Always be willing to walk away.

 

[Liquid_Mind]

Thanks guys.

I have deleted her and nexted her. No time for that in my world.

I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt when I did it. She seemed too sweet...but if she is an attention ***** deep down then she can get f**ked by satan himself.

The one thing I do NOT tolerate in my world is women trying to exploit me.

I read judge nismo's post on the 52 truths about women. Opened my eyes a LOT. I learned more from this past week, then I ever have in my entire life. btw I still kept her number. Because when I get with other women I'm gonna take a picture of me with the hottest girl I can get, and send it to her. That'll show her just what she decided to miss out on the little skank.


To menkind!

LM

 

[Atom Smasher]

Liquid Mind, whatever you do, don't even think about sending a picture to her. It will only demonstrate to her that you are hurt and insecure.

Think about it... she will have ownership of you until you let her go internally. Don't let her be your jailer. I recommend you delete her number and move on for real. She proved to be not worth your attention.

 

[Liquid_Mind]

Liquid Mind, whatever you do, don't even think about sending a picture to her. It will only demonstrate to her that you are hurt and insecure.

Think about it... she will have ownership of you until you let her go internally. Don't let her be your jailer. I recommend you delete her number and move on for real. She proved to be not worth your attention.

Atom. I'm happy you posted.

But if you knew me you'd know I'm a man who believes very much in eye for an eye. There is no forgive or forget clause with me. If someone does something to me, I do the same in return.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Yes, but this could be a symptom of what tends to put you into depression. It's not good when we give a woman residence in our minds, allowing her to cook on the burner, when we are not even a blip in her mind. That's what I mean by ownership. While we're expending energy and anger on her, she's totally free.

Women are capricious and moody. She was probably on the fence about you to begin with (they usually are), and you didn't tip the scale in your favor. That's our job... to create that tipping point by being scarce, mysterious, etc.

Her losing interest isn't really "doing something" to you. She can't help who she's attracted to. When this occurs they usually start to fade out of the picture (ignoring texts, etc.) because they're afraid to confront directly.

What I'm suggesting is, don't waste your energy and attention on her. Use that energy toward improving your life. Trust me, the only one who will pay the price is you, not her. Contemplating revenge tends to consume a man. Whoever said "The best revenge is a life well-lived" knew something.

Revenge keeps you tethered to your target.

 

[Liquid_Mind]

You are right. But more importantly I knew that to begin with. I just want her to know how much bigger and better I'm going to be without her. I want her to see me with girls that are better than her. and most of all I want her to feel the regret of the day she thought I wasn't good enough.

I'm going to be the biggest thing in the world. One day, I will own my own nightclub - the best in the world. And one day, who knows, we may meet again and I will stand there with a smile on my face as she realises what she did.

Revenge isn't as important as sending a message. That's what I aim to do, not just with her, but for the whole world.

Appreciate your posts Atom. Thank you.

 

[Greasy Pig]

Mate, please listen to Atom Smasher. He's a damn guru with this sort of stuff.
The best revenge you can have on a girl like this is to give her nothing. The minute you send that photo, you cease being the mystery man who seemingly dropped off the face of the earth, to being the sad loser she is now super glad she got rid of.
A true alpha doesn't do what you propose.
You should just aim to get your shyt together, buy that nightclub and then treat her like she never existed when she suddenly becomes interested again now that you have status, power and money.
That's the best way to nuke her hamster.

 

[Liquid_Mind]

My apologies if the post above was taken the wrong way.

What I wanted to say was that I agree with Atom and I will continue to ignore her as I have been doing. Thats the message I want to send. By completely giving her the big freeze. I want her to feel from it and realise what shes missed out on. Thats all.

The info you've given is invaluable. Thanks again.

 

[ludis]

There is no One <-- Click

 

[expos]

Scarcity = Value

The moment you disappear, the moment you become more valuable to them. Re-engaging with her, no matter how appealing it may be, won't draw her closer to you in any way. This is the way it works.

Every ex that I've pulled back in my life was due to me disappearing completely and never reaching out to them. I ignored an ex who dumped me for another guy back in college and I never even bothered to write, text or anything like that. I dropped off the face of the fvcking planet. Guess who came back 7 months later trying to get a hold of me?

Same thing back in high school. I would chase this girl around and try to get her to go out with me. She basically was into older guys and always blew me off. One day, I got fed up with her and just went cold. Not even looking at her in the hall ways. A couple months later she moves away. Guess who writes me a letter a year later apologizing to me and writing how she was mean to me and how amazing I was?

Even my ex-wife! After our D, I went GHOST for 5 months. Blocked her on Facebook even. Not a peep. Had to get a hold of her regarding a few things and she was actually sort of nice and you could tell she was interested in talking. But the moment I became too available, it gave her incentives to destroy me. Bad move, but she was a bad woman.

Take our advice and completely disappear. Try to act like she never existed.

What is that line from that Smith's song? "The more you ignore me, the closer I get"?

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Become mysterious. Separate yourself from everyone else. No contact at all.