So I know this woman, mid 30s. I knew her since I was around 21 so about 6 years thus far. Six years ago had a one night stand but we frequent the same places and are normally civil with each other.
However, I fear this one is delusional... She is in her mid 30s and has declining looks, smokes a lot and does not exercise much. She is still somewhat attractive, but her looks are literally declining and it is noticeable to me. She was divorced once, has a child, and a lot of history. Yet at the same time she has some kind of entitled attitude. But somehow she has this mentality that she can pull down some high quality guy, and tries to date wealther men and essentially has them cover the costs of the entire date. She also has had a lot of men in her past and would be categorized by most men as a slut. Of course her success in finding a relationship has not been good, so she asks me, a man, about my opinion and what is wrong.
I decide to help her, to be honest and tell her the truth she does not want to here so that she can possibly fix all her delusions. First I know she puts out soon, and I say to her that I figure she has sex after a couple dates and they just stop being interested. She nods in reply... I say that she puts it out and they do not want any more because they do not see anything worthwile in her past that. That she does not have much to offer men besides sex because she has so much bad history and issues. I figure to help her realize these problems to help make her understand and be more realistic so that she does not keep making the same mistake, or to put her life in order. I mean she is in her mid 30s thinking she can pull down quality guys and complete with all the other women both younger and far more attractive with more to offer and less bad history than she does, so of couse she is not going to have success.
To which point... Splash goes the martini... Tasted like peaches. I am not mad, as I think she did herself in by not listening. Oh well, some people can make the same mistake over and over again and never learn.
I think my meditation on this event which applies directly to this site is that one must understand their own value, and be realistic about it. Too often we overinflate our own value in our minds and then have to deal with the dissonance when our expectations do not meet up with reality. Also, I think knowing and realizing one's flaws is important, so if someone points out your flaws do not look at it so harshly and do not beat yourself up for it but instead look at it as a realization that there are always things about us that we can improve on.
However, I fear this one is delusional... She is in her mid 30s and has declining looks, smokes a lot and does not exercise much. She is still somewhat attractive, but her looks are literally declining and it is noticeable to me. She was divorced once, has a child, and a lot of history. Yet at the same time she has some kind of entitled attitude. But somehow she has this mentality that she can pull down some high quality guy, and tries to date wealther men and essentially has them cover the costs of the entire date. She also has had a lot of men in her past and would be categorized by most men as a slut. Of course her success in finding a relationship has not been good, so she asks me, a man, about my opinion and what is wrong.
I decide to help her, to be honest and tell her the truth she does not want to here so that she can possibly fix all her delusions. First I know she puts out soon, and I say to her that I figure she has sex after a couple dates and they just stop being interested. She nods in reply... I say that she puts it out and they do not want any more because they do not see anything worthwile in her past that. That she does not have much to offer men besides sex because she has so much bad history and issues. I figure to help her realize these problems to help make her understand and be more realistic so that she does not keep making the same mistake, or to put her life in order. I mean she is in her mid 30s thinking she can pull down quality guys and complete with all the other women both younger and far more attractive with more to offer and less bad history than she does, so of couse she is not going to have success.
To which point... Splash goes the martini... Tasted like peaches. I am not mad, as I think she did herself in by not listening. Oh well, some people can make the same mistake over and over again and never learn.
I think my meditation on this event which applies directly to this site is that one must understand their own value, and be realistic about it. Too often we overinflate our own value in our minds and then have to deal with the dissonance when our expectations do not meet up with reality. Also, I think knowing and realizing one's flaws is important, so if someone points out your flaws do not look at it so harshly and do not beat yourself up for it but instead look at it as a realization that there are always things about us that we can improve on.