Golden DJ

dj_spain

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GOLDEN DJ

This information is taken from another posts and from personal experience. I hope this post helps everyone, and newbies in special, live a happier life and turn into the great guy we all have within.



BE CONFIDENT:
Confidence is the first step to success.
You will only suceed if you believe in yourself!


Have high self-esteem:

The most important thing to high-selfesteem is to accept yourself. Find out your weaknesses and try to improve them. Try to improve in every area of your life. Self-improvement will boost your self-esteem. Never let rejections and putdowns distabilize you. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Confidence comes from within, by realizing your selfworth and your value. Start liking yourself and believing that you can succeed. Have this “I can do” attitude.


Be positive:

Nobody likes negative people. People like happy people. Eliminate all negative aspects of your life. Have a positive internal dialogue. Stop complaining. Look on the bright side of life and always focus on the positive. Remember that happiness and enthusiasm are extremely infectious and attractive.


Improve your appearance:

Your appearance is very important, and it is something you have control over. Workout consistantly and get yourself into good shape, wear nice clothes that fit your style. Keep all areas clean. Get a haircut regularly. Keep all your nails clipped and clean. Make sure if you have facial hair that it's always looking good and take good care of your skin.

HAVE A BACKBONE:
Having a backbone is the difference between being a man and being a chump


Stand up for yourself:

Solve problems and don’t place blame. Take responsibility for your actions.
Don’t follow and be submissive. Have your own opinions, take your own decisions. Influence others and be a leader. Never feel that you have to prove yourself to anyone.
Be ambitious. Have desire to make yourself a better person and to create a great life. Always try to win in everything you do. Have dreams that go beyond that of dating women. Focus on achieving your goals. Aim for the stars.


Overcome fear:

It is fear that keeps us from growing into the men we want to become. Only by overcoming our fears we can accomplish great things. You must not live a life of fear, rather one must live a life of excitement. Nobody wishes to live a life of stagnation, hiding under a rock in loneliness.Don’t fear failure. Don’t fear rejection. Don’t fear approaching women. Recognize your fears and face them.


Earn respect:

The respect which you get from others is closely tied to your self respect.
Self respect is extremely important. If you don’t respect yourself, you will not be respected by others. The most important rule you should remember is that you should never give anyone else more respect than you have for yourself, because if you have more respect for a certain person than for yourself, then you are basically saying that you feel you are not worthy of his respect, and this person will disrespect you.
Respect must be earned. Also don’t go around disrespecting others, because this just means that you have no self respect and try to make up for it by pushing others around.
Be respectful, but if, through no fault of your own, someone doesn't respect you, then you should show him no respect in return.


Be sexual:

Embrace your sexuality, don’t suppress it! Many men are scared of their sexuality. Be totally comfortable with your own masculine desires. Realize that women are sexual creatures and that they like sex as much as you do, if not more. Be open with your sexuality and don’t feel guilty talking about sex.


Don't supplicate:

Insecutity and neediness are two of the biggest obstacles to success with women.
A man is needy when he craives attention or recognition. He shows that he’s insecure when he acts on those needs. Women detect insecurity and neediness instantly. When you think that a woman is better than you and put yourself below her, you will give her the sense that she is better than you and she will want to replace you for someone better.
Stop giving the women too much attention. Don’t let your attention become cheap. Be busy and have things to do. Don’t be always avaible. Every now and then, give them the gift to miss you.
Never try to buy a woman with expensive gifts or showering her with insincere compliments to overcompensate your insecurities. There's nothing wrong with complimenting or buying her gifts, just make sure you don't do it too much. Well-timed compliments delivered in a confident and charming manner can work miracles. Don’t be afraid to disagree with her. Have your own opinions and don’t let her take control over you. Being overly argumentative isn’t good, either. Don't be too emotional. If you get upset about things easily, she will judge you to be insecure. Also never look to others to make decisions. Women like to be led. Lead them emotionally, conversationally and physically. Be in charge and take decisions. Don't go overboard with dominance, though. Women don’t like cave-men. Just make sure that the relationship is 50/50 and that you to stand on your own feet. Don’t give away your power and show that you are independant.
Make your relationship a little bit challenging. Don’t let her take you for granted. Make her jealous from time to time and stimulate her. Make things interesting for both.
Never put women on a pedestal and do not idolize anyone, but don't treat them like ****, either. Great guys treat women with love, repsect, appreciation and don't take them for granted. By all means, treat her like a queen. The difference is, be the king. Don't act like a servant while treating her like a queen. Be the king.
 

dj_spain

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BE THE HOST:
Social greatness will make you enjoy life more than anything else!


Be very social:

Be comfortable around strangers. Get to know more people and make new friends. Don’t be shy. Be talkative. Use networking and get to know your friends friends and your friends friends friends. Connect with them. Enjoy people. Having a solid social life will help you get to know a lot of women. Don’t try too hard to get a woman or a certain group of people to like you, because you will come off as needy. Never brag or try to impress people. Just focus on having a good time and be comfortable around them, the rest will follow. Have social proof everywhere you go, this will make you more valuable and will show women that you have a life and that you are cool to be around


Be open and friendly:

Consider everyone your friend until they prove otherwise. Be open and approachable. Some think that if you are too friendly people will put yourself below them and disrespect you. This will only happen if you are friendly in a submissive and needy way. As long as you remain confident and have a backbone, friendliness is a must.


Be a smooth talker:

Turning yourself into an excellent conversationalist will get you very far. Having the ability to carry an interesting conversation with everyone is very important. During a conversation, avoid awkward silences. Ask open-ended questions. Use nouning to keep the conversation flowing smoothly. This means to look for new subjects in what the other person says. Also make sure that you talk about interesting topics. Be passionate and fascinating, full of stories and ideas.
Avoid changing subjects too fast. Have control over the conversation, but make sure that you let the other person do at least 50% of the talking. Listening is very important. Listen and appear interested in what the other person says. Focus the conversation on the other person. It isn't bad to tell things about yourself, but make sure that you don’t reveal too much of yourself too soon. When talking with women focus on talking about her feelings.


Be charming:

Charm makes people feel comfortable in your presence. Charm is warm, light and pleasant. It's the ability to make people feel that they matter to you. Make people leave the interactions with you feeling better than before. The key is, be friendly, be warm and make people feel that you care about them. Act like you're having a splendid day and you'll spread it around. Compliment people, particularly women, in a sincere, non-erotic fashion. Most of us notice the clothes, the hairstyles and the eye color of the people we meet; the difference is that most people don't vocalize their positive opinions. Next time you notice a nice sweater, a bright smile, or new pair of shoes, say something. Remember people want to be noticed. Feed that need and you'll stand out as someone they like interacting with.


Build rapport:

Connect with people. Build comfort and trust. Comfort is also essential if you want to seduce more sophisticated women, because, besides attraction, they will want to feel connected to you on a deeper level. Have deeper conversation and get to know the person at a deeper level. Get to know their feelings, their fears and their dreams. Talk about intersting subjects. Look for common interests. Tell them stories, make them laugh and feel comfortable around you, teach them things. Also make sure that you show them your softer side and appear more human. Another good way to increase rapport fast is to minimize factual questions as if you would know that person for long, thus assuming intimacy to be already there. There are also advanced techniques to increase rapport like mirroring their bodylanguage. Try it and have fun.


Be scarce:

Be busy and ambitious enough in your life that you don’t have much time for anyone in special. Leave people having a good time because of you. Always under stay your welcome. Be happy when you leave. This makes you desireable because people will associate good times with you and when you leave people will want more of it.


BODY LANGUAGE TIPS:
Most of our communication is non-verbal


Smile:

Smiling conveys, both instantly and clearly, many wonderful things about yourself. Smiling demonstrates confidence, friendliness, a positive attitude, a good mood, and it gives the impression that you're someone who is, most likely, fun to be with.
When smiling, don't show your teeth, or show them only a little. Also, avoid big smiles, when your eyes are a little "smaller" then usual and your lips are really width. When smiling, have the corners of your mouth turned up in a half-smile. This radiates lots of confidence.


Eye contact:

The strongest of all none verbal messages are sent through the eyes. Direct eye contact signals that you are listening to the other person and that you want to know more about that person. Powerful and arousing, eye contact is one of the most potent "weapons" in your arsenal. Direct eye contact shows self-confidence and triggers a primitive part of the human brain. Unrelenting eye contact creates a highly emotional state. Maintain eye contact 75% of the conversation. Eye contact should be natrual and not forced or overdone.


Posture:

Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back and keep your head high. While trying to implement all of these postural improvements, don't lock your arms. There is a tendency to lock the arms when concentrating on another part of the body. Leave arms relaxed and loose at sides while walking. Also slow down your movements. Walk slower. Now don't walk like a slow slouch or an unmotivated person. There's a way to walk slow and just command respect. Keep your shoulders back, head up, and move your legs at a slow but natural speed. Don't walk like you had your back replaced with a picket because of a car accident. Be a lil bit looser. But still, radiate confidence. Never display nervousness. Relax. Get rid of nervous ticks, biting nails, fidgeting or nervous laughs. Presence is also important. When you are seated, take up as much space as posible. Symmetry is also an attractive quality. Don't cross your legs. Be balanced. Have an open posture. A relaxed open posture sends out the clear signals of openness and receptivity. Keep you hands away from your mouth and keep your arms and legs uncrossed. Crossed arms tend to show a defensive frame of mind and not particularly favorable to outside contact. They can also indicate impatience, judgment, displeasure any of witch would discourage people from opening up.
The most important thing to remember is to keep an open, relaxed, confident posture.


Voice tone:

Work on developing a deep, resonant, musical, articulate voice tone.
If your voice is nasal, try to lower it a little bit. You should be able to feel your voice resonating in your chest when you talk.
Fluctuate and modulate your voice and let it become song-like.
Diction is very important when it comes to communication. When you talk you have to train yourself to emphasize every consonant. Don’t talk too fast. Slow down. Vary your speed depending on the excitement of the conversation, but remember to take breaths. Know when to pause or break. Also keep in mind that every word you say has to be backed with a certain level of energy. Show enthusiasm when you speak.


Kino:

Kino is the art of touching someone. Kino is touching someone in a social situation. Kino is casual. Kino does not draw intention to itself, it does not make the other wonder why you touched them, it does not register itself consciously in the other's mind; yet, despite all that, it heightens the attraction between you and that other person. When starting kino, make it very subtle, almost imperceptible.
 

dj_spain

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FOCUS ON FUN:
Have fun and sweep her of her feet!


Be outgoing:

Don’t be shy. Don't be boring. Be extravert. Make people see your confidence shine and don’t be surprised if you see guys and girls follow you around looking for more of your vibe.
Focus on having fun. Make everything you do look fun, and it will create an aura around you that is like a magnet. The chicks always go to the fun, the guys go for the fun too.
Sex is fun, kissing is fun, laughing is fun, flirting is fun, everything is fun! If you can't have sincere fun with a woman, or with your friends, you won't be getting nearly as many women as when you are. Be unpredictable and spontaneous. Be dynamic in everything you do. Be surprising. Do exciting, adventurous, unusual things.


Humor:

Humor is a must. If you can make women laugh and get those good feelings flowing through them, they will love you. Go for a witty and ****y approach to humor. Keep your eyes open and look around. There is plenty of funny stuff going on constantly, if you are just open enough to look for it. Humor and intelligence often go hand-in-hand. Keep up-to-date on world current events. So often, you will read about or see something in the news that will give you plenty of material for humor. Also, having a good vocabulary helps a lot. Humor is about about shattering expectations, surprising people, and exaggeration. Tell stories about funny or interesting things that happened to you or make up your own stories. Sexual innuendo, sarcasm and irony also work, if used correctly. Smile, laugh, and enjoy yourself. People will see you as fun-loving and cheerful and the humor will flow much better. Don't overdo humor, though. Don’t be joking 24/7, if you want to be taken seriously. Let people know you have a serious side and can talk about serious things, too. Timing is very important with humor. Avoid self-depricating humor and laughing at your own jokes very often. Also never “try” to be funny for the sake of getting attention or getting people to like you, this is what clowns do. Use humor because you want to have a good time.


Teasing and C&F:

Busting on women, making fun of them and treating them like bratty little kids stimulates them, and shows them that you aren’t a pushover, that you aren’t needy, that you have a great sense of humor and that you like to have fun. C&F is an excellent tool of attraction. The key to C&F is to understand that it is'nt meant to insult. It has to be funny and smooth. Tease her in a way that she has no choice but to laugh or to playfully hit you. Important is also to never overuse C&F on any woman, because it would come off as overcompensating. Use C&F with moderation. Timing is also very important here.
Remember that the key to effective teasing is to never lose playfulness.




ABOUT LOVE:

Many people think that falling in love is bad. They associate falling in love with being submissive and feminine. However, there's a huge contrast between a heathy, reciprocal love and a one-sided blind obsession that degenerates you into a clingy chump. Falling in love is actually one of the best things that can happen to you.
Being in love with a girl should make you want to be more masculine, be the leader, sweep her off her feet and make sure she will never forget you.
 

ShizamDaMan

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Great way to summarize many of the important aspects of the Don Juan philosophy.
 

dj_spain

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What I wanted to do with this post is to more or less summarize the mindset and the attitude you should have.
In the past I commited the mistake of spending too much time on this site reading too many posts without gaining much experience on the field.
What I do now is read this post only once a week or less as a reminder and a confidence boost, and try to spend more time on the field to gain more and more experience and less time in front of the computer.
 

check_mate_kid_uk

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this post is not really any help to me but to any newbie that needs to know some basics this stuff is solid! this would be a good introduction to the bible, before the more complicated concepts.
 

Bonez

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bump
 

Holland

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Be open and friendly:

Consider everyone your friend until they prove otherwise. Be open and approachable. Some think that if you are too friendly people will put yourself below them and disrespect you. This will only happen if you are friendly in a submissive and needy way. As long as you remain confident and have a backbone, friendliness is a must.
It's the difference between kindness and nice-guyism.
 

Chez

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Great man
 
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