Going to Basic

[Kilika]

First of all, if this is in the wrong spot or things like this aren't done here, I understand.

Me and my gf just broke up. She was pretty torn up I was going to be gone half of next year at Basic Training and AIT, so we decided to part on good terms so both of us would have time to think and so parting would hurt less when I leave (in a couple o' weeks).

But I'm not feeling too great right now. It wasn't fun watching her sniffle and try not to cry while I akwardly explained when I'd be back, and promising to write her even if we weren't technically dating anymore.
I just couldn't imagine working a relationship while gone in training for so long, and she agreed it'd be straining. Though I did say I'd still be interested to date her again when I came back. I hope I don't seem like a jerk.
I miss her. But better now than ruining my concentration at Basic.

I know there are a lot of soldiers already overseas, and I know my problem is nothing on theirs, but it is personally distractive.

I wonder if I handled things alright. We agreed things would be difficult, we promised to still write, and I told her that if things were fine then we could think about picking up where we left off when I get home next summer.

Any thoughts? I'm not good with words, and I want to know if there is anything more I should say or do to make her feel better and understand I really care about her.

 

[Maxtro]

Wow, props to you on breaking up with your girlfriend and not stringing her along. It takes a real man to say goodbye. I hate seeing girls that are in long distance relationships. In my view, it just means that her boyfriend is some looser who can't get any others girls and so he tries to hang on to her, even though he's not able to have sex with her. Complete AFC. Unfortunately girls are still able to get their emotional needs met most of the time so they are content unless they find a better guy.

But in your case it is different. But still I think you are doing the right thing. Know that she will most likely find another guy pretty soon but don't get offended, it's just the way women are. At least this way you can probably still get with her when your ever in town instead of you two hating each other after finding out that one of you cheated.

 

[WaterTiger]

Trust me Kilika, as soon as that drill instructor is barking commands in your ear you will cease to be "distracted". You WILL pay complete attention to them!

I also agree with Maxtro, it was a cruel to be kind situation with letting your girlfriend out of the relationship. It will be easier on the both of you in the long run.

 

[j0n024]

"Trust me Kilika, as soon as that drill instructor is barking commands in your ear you will cease to be "distracted". You WILL pay complete attention to them!"

not necessicarly.... you do know you can channel it out dont you? I agree it was nice of you to break up with her and it would be easier on YOU in the long run, I mean now you dont have to worry about her running around behind your back and sleeping with other guy's. Good luck at BT

 

[Hector]

Hey Kilika, I understand what you are going through. Except for going to BT i havnt been there....yet. Lemme ask you do you still love her? Now before the fire comes in, I dont want to say stay with her and create attachments because I know what its like to have attachments it hurts really bad. You know talk to her communicate ask her what she is feeling. If you want call her up, ask her how's feelsing and ask her if she wants to patch things up. Now this is my opinion on account that women are more emotional than men. What you do from here on is your call. Hope this helps, and good luck.

 

[Vice]

Kilika, props to you. Mega props.

I'm currently in a situation where the girl I'm after has a long-distance relationship with this guy going to military college.

They dated for two years prior, and apparently they got back together this Thanksgiving. It frustrates me, seeing how this guy is so far away, and is still dating her.

It says on his MySpace that he plans on marrying her some day. She's 17, he's 18. I'm about that age too.

This guy seems to get upset/angry every time I write something to her that he reads on MySpace.

What you did must have been very difficult, but it is the right decision. That is exactly what I would have done, to avoid situations like the one that I'm in from happening, and others. And the thing is that you're going to military training, not college, so you most likely won't get very many chances to meet new girls unless they allow you to go into town. I respect you for that. The guy that's long distance dating the girl I'm after is in college, and he can hook up with any girl he wants to up there without her knowing.

Good luck to you man, and I promise that this following summer will be one of the best in your life.