going to a club by yourself

[everywomanshero]

No Excuses

Guys who say they can't sarge alone are making excuses. I just got home from a Mexican Bar where I knew *no one*. I joined a table, danced with girls, and had conversation with both guys and gals all night long. It's not hard. All my friends were busy with dates and shyt, and my main girl is out of town this weekend. You really have to make your own fun, excuses are not acceptable unless you want to stay some low self concept, anti-social dude your whole life.

You can choose to put your self concept on steriods and send your social skills into a whole new level. However, it is first required that one get rid of such self limiting beliefs. Nothing will work unless you believe it will.

 

[Gonzalo]

Funny that this thread is up, I just got back from sarging solo. Went to this bar/club by myself, none of my boys could/would come, plus I HAD to go take some pictures of this band, for a school project.

Place was pretty packed, and whie resting from taking pictures of the band, I would go off and start doing sets. You know what's funny? That of the twenty-something sets I did, the ONLY girl who asked me who I was with was a girl I already knew who I ran into. No one else seemed to give a sh1t, for real.

Also remember, even if you are by yourself, still give yourself the time constraints (e.g. "I have to get back to my friends in a minute"). Nobody will question that. Or you think that the girls will be like "friends? what friends? I don't believe you, I think you are making the whole 'I'm here with friends' thing up'". Forget about it. If anything, your friends are "upstairs," "on their way" there, or "they just left". Though like I say, if you come in with a captivating enough opener, they'll assume you are a social person and go straight into giving their opinion/whatever.

WTF people, if you really want to get better at this you gotta put in the time. Think about it, if you wanted to learn to play the guitar, would you only practice if somebody was there to babysit you? This game is what you make out of it.

 

[WillieSacks]

Before I got into a relationship I used to go to clubs by myself all the time, anytime I was asked who I was with, I would say "I'm by myself..", that never stopped me from getting laid. Some ladies may even think your brave for going out by yourself since most fools need someone to hold their hands when they go out.

I never had more fun than the first time I went solo, all my friends ditched me and usually I would just go home but that time, I was like "F*kk it" I wasn't letting my friends going home early ruin my night, so I dropped them off and went solo to Club Rio in AZ, drunk as hell, I had the best time of my life when I went out that night (other than Vegas).

It all depends on how you carry yourself, before I got laid one time, this girl I picked up told me that she liked me because I seemed confident in myself .why should you give a fukk about what some girl thinks that you just met that night anyway, so what if she thinks your lonely, you don' t know the biitch, she don't pay your bills, fukk what her and her fat friends think.just go out and have a good time. Even though your friends may keep you company while you are out sometimes, they may be the reason why you may not get lad that night....

For example, I've gone out with friends when they drove and I didn't have a ride and I could have taken a chick home but I had no transportation so I had to wait for my friends, or one time I was the driver and I could n't just leave my Wingman at the club by himself or better yet, how about when your vibing with a chick but your boy just isn' tfeeling the spot and wants to go somewhere else, then you may have to end up just getting a phone number when, if you had put in a little more work, could have gotten laid that night.

 

[penguin]

I go everywhere alone.

My friends are boring now. They got girlfriends and became lame (ie. whipped).

I think it's nice to go to the movies and stuff like that alone. But clubs etc? I wouldn't recommend it. Not because of what people may think, but it's just the atmosphere where you tend to just want to have some fun with people instead of feel awkward.

 

[organizedconfusion]

geez, alot of people still don't get it..i see alot of people trying to make up excuses, trying to cover up the fact that they're 'alone' and still giving their power away..You're saying 'i'm alone' but what you're really communicating is
'i am uncomfortable'... who cares man?! Have a light workout, take a long shower,shave ,dress up ,eat something good,cruise around the city a little bit,loosen up ,take a few shots and go out to have a good time and meet some woman! thats a routine EVERYONE should do that goes out alone to escape the negative mentality of being..alone. It's a good habit,trait to have-
you're independent, you could'nt care less and you do what you want to do , not what the herd is doing.Everyone is still approval seeking and reconition seeking,and not wanting to be seen this way or percived that way..who cares? order a drink ,play some pool, chat up a few ladies and have good time,it just seems like (from the responses)everyone is soo focused on other peoples opinions that they are not even having a good time.Nobody cares if you're with anyone or not..they're more concerned about the time they'll be having.

 

[gimmeyofonenumba]

A few months i was at clubs by myself like every weekend, I was blowing too much money, so havent been in a while. I got phone numbers, but never any ONS, wasnt exactly my goal. I just wanted to dance with chicks, and man thats what i did. I would only go to clubs I knew would be packed with people, and clubs that werent lounges or anything. Thats what worked for me, I didnt like the lounge scene because its like a restaurant, everyone is like in their own table, and its hard to mingle. The trick for me, was as soon as I got into the club I'd just be real happy, screaming "yaaaa" to show everyone you're really havin a good time, I'd give high 5's to the dudes around me. You just gotta have a higher energy level than everyone else, and just dont be a jackazz. This really gets the girl's attention too, the chicks see you're havin a great time, and wanna be around you. Just smile alot go right up to them and start dancing. Make um feel like when they dance with you, there is no happier place/people to be with.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

I sarge alone, but never in clubs. I'll leave that to you younger dudes, I just can't handle them anymore, not my scene, not my style.

 

[Thomas94305]

Clubbing alone comes up in my life too. I do salsa more, and drinking less. I go to other social activities. But, friends are "busy", or whatever. My conclusion is.. I NEED NEW FRIENDS. A very basic part of friendship is just being there for the other person. If they can't just show up, then my circle of friends is "wanting". It just sucks going to clubs, and your friends are too lame to tag along. Good friends would be there with me searching for babes.

To that end, I'm actually applying several of the DJ methods in building friendships.. don't worry, am not applying the kiss test or any of that freaky stuff. But, initiate like crazy. See every person as a potential friend. Let them know what you want. Don't put up with flaking or games.

In just a couple of months, I've noticed a complete change. I have "friends" that would invite me to their things, and I'd go. But when I invited, they never showed. I stopped that, and communicated this is not OK. None of them "just walked away", oddly enough. They *****ed and complained about me not doing their things any more, and it was satisfying to tell them that it's because they don't do my things. I have a couple of new friends in my life, where the activities are chosen mutually.. sometimes I pick, sometimes s/he picks, sometimes it's mutual.

The result is I just simply feel better, and my inner game is shooting up.

DJ isn't just about HBs. It's about self-respect. Apply it to your circle of friends, don't be too worried about flakes, they weren't your friends to begin with.

Sarge on!