Viper
Banned
If you looked loser in the dictionary you would get me, no life, no friends, no social skills what so ever, sure I look good, clean myself up and I'm a good musician, but that still doesn't help the fact that I'm a flat out loser. But I'm aiming to change that and my goal is to, by the end of the year, not get laid, not get a girlfriend, but to get a life.
I want to make more friends, but I'm afraid that if I go up to a random person(Especially, guy) and start conversation, I'll say something stupid, they won't like me/think I'm cool enough, or I'll just get flat out rejected. To add to that, my conversationial skills are almost non-existant, I'm afraid to even approach a random person and say "Hey, how's it going? What's your name?", because I'm afraid I won't be able to build enough interest, to become that persons friend. I think that all this insecurity comes from one thing, the fact that I care too much about what other people think and it's really hard for a guy like me not to. It's definitely a problem, I'm always thinking about people judging me, I never feel that I'm good enough for them, I constantly think about what spectators will think if I do this or that, I definitely care too much and I want to change that. I don't even have to know the person and I'll still be paranoid that they're judging and thinking badly about me. It doesn't even have to be anything big, I could be in the lunchroom and just want to walk around, but then I think about all the people out there in the cafeteria, judging me and I just sit my ass back. I could even be thinking about approaching a girl and then I'll think, "What does X think of me? What if I fail or look like a lamer, while trying to mack that girl and X thinks I'm a total idiot". But enough complaining, I'm tired of seeking peoples approval, so I want to know, do you guys have any advice on adapting that no care attitude, for some who has seeked others approval, for his whole life? I'm willing to change and knowing this would really help me out.
My conversational skills are non-existant, to add to that, I have a very hard to understand voice and people often misunderstanding me and I don't think people want to be friends with somebody, that they can't even understand. I'm sure you've heard that bit about how bad my voice is before, so I'll cut to the chase. My conversational skills are just bad, I can hardly ever compare or build rapport with people, I feel that if I don't plan what I say beforehand, the conversation won't good, I'm not one of those guys who just naturally flows in conversation. Secondly and this goes back to the previous topic, I'm just afraid that people won't like me or that I won't build rapport if I talk to them. There was this girl in the 6th Grade who was sitting next to me on the bus, that I wanted to start small talk with, to practice my skills, but I didn't do it, because I thought too much and I was too damn insecure. When you can't even convo a girl in the 6th Grade, a girl 4 grades below you, you know you suck. My conversational decline didn't just start here either, as a boy I was always shy, didn't really like talking to people, it wasn't until 6th grade that I started becoming more social. In 7th Grade, by some miracle, I became one of the most social guys in Junior High, I was well liked, I was naturally funny, girls loved me, I felt GOOD about myself, then over summer, my parents, without even asking me, decide to move, so of course I had to go to a new school. The movement had me really depressed for a while, the thought of never seeing my friends at my old school again, made me sad and at my new school in 8th Grade, I became shy again. During lunch I always sat alone, during recess, I would just sit alone, watching everybody socialize and when people tried to talk to me, I just mumbled under by breath. 2 years later, it has improved and I'm not as depressed as I was back then and people are now more comfortable being around me(I use to only take a shower once a week, until someone inspired me to clean up my look, now I take showers everyday and dress much better), but I'm still a loser.
My life outside of school is non-existant and besides school, I spend most of my inside my house, in my room. I used to have band practices Wednesday nights and during the football season, we would go to the teams games and march at halftime, but now that the football season is over, my Wednesday and Friday nights are pretty much free, to lay around and do nothing. That's pretty much how my life outside of school can be described, NON-EXISTANT. When I come home from High School, I go up to my room, stay there until dinner, get dinner, bring it upstairs to my room, eat dinner, stay in my room until School the next day, I might occasionally weight train, but that's it. But I'm tired not having a life and I want to change it, I want a more active life, now, I'm thinking about joining a sport or maybe joining a club and if you guys have any other suggestions, make sure to tell me.
I want to make more friends, but I'm afraid that if I go up to a random person(Especially, guy) and start conversation, I'll say something stupid, they won't like me/think I'm cool enough, or I'll just get flat out rejected. To add to that, my conversationial skills are almost non-existant, I'm afraid to even approach a random person and say "Hey, how's it going? What's your name?", because I'm afraid I won't be able to build enough interest, to become that persons friend. I think that all this insecurity comes from one thing, the fact that I care too much about what other people think and it's really hard for a guy like me not to. It's definitely a problem, I'm always thinking about people judging me, I never feel that I'm good enough for them, I constantly think about what spectators will think if I do this or that, I definitely care too much and I want to change that. I don't even have to know the person and I'll still be paranoid that they're judging and thinking badly about me. It doesn't even have to be anything big, I could be in the lunchroom and just want to walk around, but then I think about all the people out there in the cafeteria, judging me and I just sit my ass back. I could even be thinking about approaching a girl and then I'll think, "What does X think of me? What if I fail or look like a lamer, while trying to mack that girl and X thinks I'm a total idiot". But enough complaining, I'm tired of seeking peoples approval, so I want to know, do you guys have any advice on adapting that no care attitude, for some who has seeked others approval, for his whole life? I'm willing to change and knowing this would really help me out.
My conversational skills are non-existant, to add to that, I have a very hard to understand voice and people often misunderstanding me and I don't think people want to be friends with somebody, that they can't even understand. I'm sure you've heard that bit about how bad my voice is before, so I'll cut to the chase. My conversational skills are just bad, I can hardly ever compare or build rapport with people, I feel that if I don't plan what I say beforehand, the conversation won't good, I'm not one of those guys who just naturally flows in conversation. Secondly and this goes back to the previous topic, I'm just afraid that people won't like me or that I won't build rapport if I talk to them. There was this girl in the 6th Grade who was sitting next to me on the bus, that I wanted to start small talk with, to practice my skills, but I didn't do it, because I thought too much and I was too damn insecure. When you can't even convo a girl in the 6th Grade, a girl 4 grades below you, you know you suck. My conversational decline didn't just start here either, as a boy I was always shy, didn't really like talking to people, it wasn't until 6th grade that I started becoming more social. In 7th Grade, by some miracle, I became one of the most social guys in Junior High, I was well liked, I was naturally funny, girls loved me, I felt GOOD about myself, then over summer, my parents, without even asking me, decide to move, so of course I had to go to a new school. The movement had me really depressed for a while, the thought of never seeing my friends at my old school again, made me sad and at my new school in 8th Grade, I became shy again. During lunch I always sat alone, during recess, I would just sit alone, watching everybody socialize and when people tried to talk to me, I just mumbled under by breath. 2 years later, it has improved and I'm not as depressed as I was back then and people are now more comfortable being around me(I use to only take a shower once a week, until someone inspired me to clean up my look, now I take showers everyday and dress much better), but I'm still a loser.
My life outside of school is non-existant and besides school, I spend most of my inside my house, in my room. I used to have band practices Wednesday nights and during the football season, we would go to the teams games and march at halftime, but now that the football season is over, my Wednesday and Friday nights are pretty much free, to lay around and do nothing. That's pretty much how my life outside of school can be described, NON-EXISTANT. When I come home from High School, I go up to my room, stay there until dinner, get dinner, bring it upstairs to my room, eat dinner, stay in my room until School the next day, I might occasionally weight train, but that's it. But I'm tired not having a life and I want to change it, I want a more active life, now, I'm thinking about joining a sport or maybe joining a club and if you guys have any other suggestions, make sure to tell me.
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one of my friends thinks that playing on-line games helped him get over his social phobia,maybe that is why he curses alot. and since the football season is now over join wrestling.sports help your confidence.
