Goin out alone?

[Mike32ct]

I go out almost exclusively alone at night clubs. It does take a hit on your social proof and is something of hole you have to dig out of it. But a good wing is very hard to find. Other than the SP and helping you occupy girls in setrs, most wings cause more problems than they solve. Really though you don't need a wing when you approach sets. It really comes down to SP and being seen talking to others. If you are good at cold approaching and can hold sets or work the dance floor. No one will even realize you are there alone.

If I had to choose between going out alone or going out with a bad wing or not going out at all, I choose to go out alone.

^This.

I also second bigneil's comments.

 

[sexysuave]

well, for one a guy who is alone usually seems like a creep. Girls are always surrounded by friends.

Girls usually like to date people within their social 'arena' or group. that means wherever you go there will be people there who have usually associated with the girl you want. Girls hang out at these places, like regulars. Usually anyway.

I mean, sure you can go out alone but just think of this.

Guys aren't really social. Guys only go out to get laid, or hang with their friends to do what? Usually to get laid and tell themselves they are social like the girls.

Only girls will say "I want to go out and DANCE just to DANCE".

But the reality is, they don't dance just to dance. They don't go out and are social just to be social. They do this to increase their chances with men and gain more opportunities. But they want to do it under the disguise as "being social" and "being with friends", really they're just talking to their girlfriends about their judgements of men.

It's more accepted for girls to do this. To hang with their girlfriends, etc. If it's a bunch of guys? please, it's a sausage fest.

For me,it's hard to go out alone. I have no reason to go out. I don't hang with male friends because I choose not to. Actually because I'm unbalanced. I need a woman to hang with not a man. If I go out alone, I am looking for a woman. That usually comes off as creepy or needy, or clueless, etc.

Unless you're a player,"social butterfly type", or more like a party pooper, or party hopper. And to do what? Get laid. That's the only reason why people REALLY go out.

So unless you are a player, don't go out alone. Choose the excuse of being social to get laid.

No guy goes out to "look at the scenery". You mean the women, not scenery. No girl goes out to look at the scenery either. At least not consciously. Usually anyways.

If I would go out with someone else, I would want to split up.

What the F*CK are you even talking about? lol your posts have been just plain stupid man. I really dont' know what your'e trying to get outta these boards. Most of the time, you're not making any sort of sense at all. How old are you dude?

And snowdog, dont' worry about san jose cali, dude is still a virgin.. (nothing wrong with it san jo cali, just a little odd that you give SO much advice out there and you haven't done anything to actually get laid yet)..

Oh, and what part of San Jose are you from? I actually grew up in San Jose lol, moved away back in 2000... Ever been to Starbird Park?

 

[Jaylan]

As for going to the club or bar alone, what the hell's wrong with 26 out of 31 of the people that voted? The only people I've ever seen at the bar alone are 40-50 year old dudes and even they seemed a little weird. You guys can throw around all the excuses you want "my friends are busy at night" "I choose to go alone cuz I game better", but I firmly think for the majority of you it stems from lack of friends. I didn't say all of you, but the majority.

LOL virgin.(sorry I had to, because you still cant speak from experience yet to be so negative)

Dude what are you talking about? Honestly I sarged alone for the first time back on New Years. Everyone was away from campus because it was winter break and I did not have any plans and wanted to go out. So I actually googled "going to the bar or club alone" in google to see what people thought. Back then I gave a crap about looking weird and did not have the confidence I do now.

I read some stuff and said what the hell ill go out. I said whatup to another dude who was chilling alone and we have been friends and wingmen since that night. Really chill guy with a bunch of confidence. Especially on the dance floor too.

Since then whenever I couldnt get him or any of my other wings to go out on some nights, usually weeknights, I'd go out myself and have a beer and just chat people up. Since I am in a college town and have been going to this school for two years I always run into people I know. And when I dont I tend to make new friends. You just have to be comfortable and outgoing and not give a crap what others think. Go talk to people and if you have to, befriend some dudes and try and meet good wings.

And not for nothing, reading a thread like this before you go out alone helps psych you up a bit and get you in that "I dont care I wanna go out and have fun" mindset.

 

[thevilittletroll]

i have found that i get laid more when i go out alone. if i dont do any approaches i will wind up not talking to anybody the whole night which is no fun, it forces me to talk to people. when i go out with my friends my menality is different and i dont approach as many girls. i'm more concerned with having fun with my friends and not approaching.

social proof can be done when you go out alone. all you have to do is approach and open everyone in the bar. you will be percieved as the person who knows everybody, high value, social, friendly, fun = attractive social proof. tip....you must be very successful and be able to at least hook all your sets. if you are getting blown out everytime it will have the opposite effect.

 

[InVader]

Alright, thanks for the responses. And some interesting discussion.

For anyone whos interested I ended up going out to the pub all day with a mate from work at midday and that was out until about 11 when we went our seperate ways. Came home and was quite drunk so decided to give the club a miss. Never seem to do too well when i'm too drunk so would have probably been money wasted!

With regards to the subject matter it seems that there are two very conflicting viewpoints when discussing this topic and theres no middle ground.

Not sure I have the balls (yet) to go out on my own as I reckon i'd feel self conscious if not chatting to someone. I find this if i lose my mates in the club.

I do however find that whenever I do pull its usually by approaching solo but if unsuccessful I always find it helps to have the sanctuatry of my mates to return to so that I can laugh it off.

The guys who appear creepy when out alone probably are, hence the weird vibe you get off them. They probably dont have many friends.

In response to the comment about 50 year olds hanging around clubs on their own, that would look weird where i'm from but in some towns it might look ok. Luckily i'm only 25!

The comment about girls and their social circles definatley rings true to me, having friends with many girlfriends does have its benefits.

Anyway my opininon on the whole thing is that i'd rather save my money and have a night out with my mates where I hopefully go on to pull. But everyones different and I defintley respect guys who can go out on their own and hook up with a few women.

I reckon at the end of the day its all about your state of mind.

 

[snowdog]

Alright, thanks for the responses. And some interesting discussion.

For anyone whos interested I ended up going out to the pub all day with a mate from work at midday and that was out until about 11 when we went our seperate ways. Came home and was quite drunk so decided to give the club a miss. Never seem to do too well when i'm too drunk so would have probably been money wasted!

With regards to the subject matter it seems that there are two very conflicting viewpoints when discussing this topic and theres no middle ground.

Not sure I have the balls (yet) to go out on my own as I reckon i'd feel self conscious if not chatting to someone. I find this if i lose my mates in the club.

I do however find that whenever I do pull its usually by approaching solo but if unsuccessful I always find it helps to have the sanctuatry of my mates to return to so that I can laugh it off.

The guys who appear creepy when out alone probably are, hence the weird vibe you get off them. They probably dont have many friends.

In response to the comment about 50 year olds hanging around clubs on their own, that would look weird where i'm from but in some towns it might look ok. Luckily i'm only 25!

The comment about girls and their social circles definatley rings true to me, having friends with many girlfriends does have its benefits.

Anyway my opininon on the whole thing is that i'd rather save my money and have a night out with my mates where I hopefully go on to pull. But everyones different and I defintley respect guys who can go out on their own and hook up with a few women.

I reckon at the end of the day its all about your state of mind.

Don't take the negative advice here seriously, since that comes from guys who never seriously gave it a shot. Going out alone will teach you a ton of things, and it will increase your confidence greatly, because you had the balls to at least give it a shot.