god, 6 straight hours with msn in the morning, did i screw up?

[DJ4Life]

yea, i feel so ashamed of myeslf for making this mistake, i have been in this dj game for almost a year now, i have learnt and changed so much over the year and i am getting a lot more success with girls than i was when i first came here, thx, sosuave.com and everyone here

two weeks ago or so i met this girl online in msn who used to go to the same school with me. Being social both online and offline, i just had a friendly chat with her. Since then we had more and more chat together on msn and i found a much closer bond to her than any other girls i have met before, both in real life and virtual

i dont think it's because she is special, coz as all djs know, no girls are "special", i think the closer bond is caused by the fact that her family background, personality and life experience are so similar to mine. when i first met her i had no intention to have a relationship with her, but now i think i may have just changed my mind.

recently for the last few days, we talked on msn for 6 hours in the morning not going to sleep for several times now. i know that it's a mistake, but it was so interesting talking to her that time just flew by without both of us realizing it

i got her number yesterday night, and wonder where i should go from here.

have i alerady screwed up and landed on the LJBF zone?

 

[Climax]

My 2c...

DJ4Life: In my opinion you have not screwed up at all. Clearly by her staying up with you all that time and spending so much of her time talking to you means that her interest levels are high.

As long as you do not let this type of thing happen on a regular basis, then everything is fine... Remember, too much of anything/anyone isn’t good for you.

If you are not seeming desperate or anything along those lines with her, then its all good and you dont have much to worry about.

If I were you I would try and meet this girl in real life, maybe go on a friendly date so that the both of you can get to know each other better, on a personal level, face to face.

Also, lets look at this from HER perspective as well: She is at home and she is probably also thinking and feeling what you are... "Do I seem desperate? Does he like me? There is something special about him but I don’t want to get hurt, this guy seems all great & stuff on MSN, but what’s he like in real life? Is this guy going to want to meet me, or am I wasting my time? Maybe I shouldn’t have spoken to him for so long, maybe that will make me seem easy?" etc.. If you think that US GUYS over analyze things sometimes, wait till you learn about how women go on about this type of stuff. Remember, women are far more emotional than us guys, which makes them feel worried, infatuated, sad, etc a lot quicker/easier than most men.

So in short, what I recommend that you do is as follows:

1) Don’t speak to her TOO much or TOO long on MSN, rather try save all that you have and want to say to her in PERSON, face to face.

2) Don’t seem desperate or needy when you suggest meeting each other, say something along the lines of "There is this place called "(XXX)" that I like going to and I would really like to take you there sometime soon It will also be a good chance for us to get to know each other better, face to face.. What do you think?" <--- This tells her that you aren’t just another guy on her MSN that has long entertaining chats with her, it shows her that you are interested in her.

3) Don’t ever have the frame of mind that you are trying to impress her, have the frame of mind that she is there to try and impress YOU. So if she doesn’t want to or can’t meet you in person, then just tell her that she must let you know when she wants to and/or is available so that you can arrange the date. <--- this lets her know that you are not desperate and that she isn’t the "centre of your world" and that you don’t NEED her in your life, if she doesn’t want to meet you, then that’s HER LOSS.

Anyways, hope this helped.


Laterz...

 

[Chemistry]

Maaan, why would you rather talk to a chick through the earlier hours of the morning on MSN than get some sleep? That sh!t is crazy, lol… only time I’ll choose a chick over sleep is when she’s lay next to me trying to fvck; I dunno, MSN just ain’t doing it for me

But yea… you want to salvage this... keep your MSN time waaay down… handle your own business… I mean, what are you gonna talk about with this chick… you know:

A: So what’ve you been up to?
B: Oh, nothing much… just talking with you on MSN

There’s no appeal there… at all… chicks like dudes who’ve got a bunch of sh!t popping off… dudes who do some interesting things and have some interesting conversations / stories because of it… you’re shooting yourself in the foot on this one if you keep this up any longer

 

[Tyron]

I can safely say that talking 6 hours won't break your game! I was in a similar situation where I talked with a chick a lot in msn and i am now regularly sleeping with her. I do not recommend that you continue to do this though. I wasn't able to see her face to face and calling was out of the question too.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Talking for a long time on MSN definetely hurts your chances. I am speaking from my own experience and the experience of other guys I have known as well. How much it hurts is a matter of what type of things you talked about and whether she finds you physically attractive.

If you talked about deep, emotional topics, chances are that she now "sees you as a brother".

Back to the thing about physical attractiveness. There are two fronts to the dynamics: "game" and "physical attraction". Neither can be denied, they are both big factors. Nothing is truly over as well until you strike out on both accounts. What I mean is that a guy a girl finds physically attractive can usually screw up his game a bit, but still have a chance.

Personally, this idea is what I used to explain "breaking out of the friendzone". If a girl doesn't find you physically attractive, and you screw your game and land in the friendzone, you're gone. No more chances. However, if you're physically attractive to her and fix your game a bit, things can change. People who break out of the friendzone sometimes mistakenly attribute it to some "technique" they used and then they go off telling everyone that they need to use this technique to break out of the friendzone. I think it has much more to do with the fact that she was already attracted to him, but he just had act a bit more like a man and less like an AFC to seal the deal.

We're not all playing on level field here. Looks change the game to some degree.

 

[DJ4Life]

thanks a lot for your responces guys


so far i can analyse this situation with pros and cons:

pros
+ i tease and neg hit her a lot, she seems to like it
+ i made it clear to her that i will not try to impress her
+ she knows that i have high standard, and sometimes i believe she tells me stuff just to impress me
+ she knows i dated a lot girls before, but not a player
+ she doesn't want me to be her bro
+ she knows im not needy or desperate for girls

cons
- i know she likes me a lot, but im not sure in what kind of way
- i can't meet her face to face for now, because she has serious issues to deal with in her family
- she is not too interested in getting a bf currently, so she said
- although i go playful and casual in our msn conversations, we did go into those deep emotional topics, i know....classic afc mistake
- she tells me personal stuff she normally wouldn't tell other people, it's a sign that she trusts me a lot, but then again it leads to LJBF

so people, is there any ways to tell her IL on the phone? i know it's not recommended but it's probaby the only option i have

 

[Bigworm]

yeah your ****ed ... think about ur definetly an afc. would you spent six hours with your best friend on msn.

 

[Zerotwoonenine]

no, infact you could turn this around, girls dont want to have relationship with men that they can bond with, you have to connect with her, so dont worry, if you guys connect u can have a great relationship together.
Just dont spend too much time at 6 in the morning.
Make sure you leave that when u go on dates cause on msn, you cant display that u r an alpha male, you cant kino, joke around, analyse her body language etc.
Set up an date and bond with her from there.
And dont tolerate disrespect.

 

[IamtheAlphamale]

**** the rules. Self improvement all the way.

 

[Rastaman]

DJ4life U doing great b'cos u've realized ur mistake, but I won't spend 6 hours with a girl on MSN b4 i getting her number. I only use MSN, phones and beepers to set up a meeting.
Its said that over ninety percent of our communication is body language n voice tone, so 6hours of MSN is really too much n at that pace u'll soon appear like a boring AFC to her.

 

[LA_Chico]

you did good bro, chicks love a guy who can last a long time.

 

[Lust]

Call her, meet up with her.

You have to take it up from MSN chatting to the phone game.

Take her out for a quick date, grab a coffee, a bite to eat something like that to start off with, shouldn't take any longer than 2 hours.

Later on, spend more time with her, right now, you just have to keep her interest levels high and keep her thinking about you.

 

[Kev07]

if you ask me(which you did in the thread title)

you have been a victim of a drive by LJBF

sorry.


any girl that would spend 6 hours chatting probably only sees you as a friend.

 

[vagrant]

yea, i feel so ashamed of myeslf for making this mistake, i have been in this dj game for almost a year now, i have learnt and changed so much over the year and i am getting a lot more success with girls than i was when i first came here, thx, sosuave.com and everyone here

two weeks ago or so i met this girl online in msn who used to go to the same school with me. Being social both online and offline, i just had a friendly chat with her. Since then we had more and more chat together on msn and i found a much closer bond to her than any other girls i have met before, both in real life and virtual

i dont think it's because she is special, coz as all djs know, no girls are "special", i think the closer bond is caused by the fact that her family background, personality and life experience are so similar to mine. when i first met her i had no intention to have a relationship with her, but now i think i may have just changed my mind.

recently for the last few days, we talked on msn for 6 hours in the morning not going to sleep for several times now. i know that it's a mistake, but it was so interesting talking to her that time just flew by without both of us realizing it

i got her number yesterday night, and wonder where i should go from here.

have i alerady screwed up and landed on the LJBF zone?

dude...that's exactly how me and my girlfriend started...one advice...take it SLOW!...don't rush like i did but at the same time don't be afraid to do anything that you wanna do cuz she's really into you...if you go over to her house right now and make your move to kiss her she wouldn't even say no...she will definitely let you...but again take it SLOW!...really SLOW!...don't say i love you and all that sh!t just yet...make yourself a mystery where she doesn't know what the hell you do with your life...if she has your number don't get caught up with all the text messages...avoid phone conversations too...if you really like her, make this sh!t last...stop logging on msn...she's already thinkin about you all day...go up to her in person and start a conversation...you can already see how much she's into you...just take it SLOW and don't ever let her control you...keep her guessing at all times...trust me...just say the word and she'll do anything when you do...don't get her to be so comfortable around you but don't show signs that you're not interested...it's cool cuz you have the control over her...anything you do you can get away with...this is the period of time between you two that if you want sex and she doesn't think she's ready, if you play it right you can make her give it to you cuz she's not comfortable just yet to say no to you...that's why you have to limit the conversation and not get her too comfortable where she starts saying all the things she doesn't like cuz if sex is on her list you're in trouble. 6 hours on msn is a sign that she likes you ever since she met you!~

 

[the pokemaster]

TIP:
don't let any chick use you as a tissue for when they cry or tampon for when they're on their period. that's the easiest way to get the LJBF. your not oprah. you're a man. let her talk to girlfriends about that sh!t.

its ok sometimes, but keep it balanced PLEASE.