Girls you work with.

[LeaveIt07]

I've ****ed up and I'm looking for some advice. Bascially had a shocking AFC move Friday night, trying to be her white knight and dragging her away from blokes only to get turned down by her. I was incredibly drunk. Anyway, I understand what a mug I've been there and I am very happy to laugh at the whole story but there is a slight problem... I work with her. I basically sit next to her at work. Getting involved with someone I work with was my first mistake obviously.

This is a girl who told everyone at work she had a thing for me. She's been all over me at work. Everyone thought she liked me. I was incredibly led on and when we talked about what happened the morning after she told me she thought I knew she was just joking and only wanted to be friends. I refuse to apologise for thinking I had a shot with her and think the fact that she doesn't think she's done anything wrong is laughable. Everyone knows her leading me on was wrong.

Anyway that's the back ground story so now for the main question...

How do you no contact someone you work with? I ignored her all day today but after lunch she had obviously spoke to her mates about it because one of them tried to sort it all out by chatting to me and telling me to talk to her. I told her quite abruptly it was none of her business and walked away.

8 minutes after I left the office today I had a text message from the girl I like saying "Say hi to Tom for me". Tom is just my mate, who I walked home with so it's obviously an attempt at getting a reaction out of me.

I had deleted her number but I'm pretty sure it is her. She doesn't know I've deleted her number.

Should I ignore her or send her a message saying "Who is this?"

Also how do I play this at work? She doesn't realise what she's done wrong by leading me on. She's apparently upset and wants to be good friends again like we were before. I obviously cannot be friends with someone I'm attracted to, I've told her I don't want to be friends with her and that if she doesn't see what she did wrong then thats her problem not mine.

She's getting petty and immature with her texts.. Do I teach her a lesson and rip into her or continue to ignore her?

 

[Backwardsman]

Just act indifferent at work, dont ignore her if its work related stuff, but dont reply to texts/calls etc - move along

 

[jurry]

Stop being a whiny little douche about it and bang some other girl. Dont get into it with her just do your own thing act indifferent, when she realizes you genuinely do not give a fvck then she'll go back to slurping your nuts again. Just dont turn into a white knight AFC again if/when the second opportunity arises.

 

[wishyo]

There is a nice rule about swinging it twice. Take some time and go for her again (if you have interest in her obviously). Girls and even women sometimes act stupid for no reason, it is still very possible that she is indeed interested in you, but she overthinked this whole thing and turned you down because she was scared/shy whatever the fvck it could, dont even try to understand it. Just swing one more time later on.
The fact that you thought that she liked you and everybody at you work is a solid argument, statements like this generally are supported by rather large sample data which was accumulated over a long period of time. By sample data I mean little things that happen at work over time, like she spent some extra time working with you for a project, smiled more than usual, mb gossiped about you with her friends at work and so on.

 

[Greasy Pig]

I've been in this situation a few times and this is what you should do. To the letter.
1. Be a consummate professional in all your dealings with her. If she has to contact you about a work issue, deal with it courteously and efficiently. No smalltalk. If she contacts you about non-work stuff, ignore her. She'll soon get the message and you've done nothing overt to make her upset. If human resources comes sniffing around, ignoring non-work related emails and texts is not a sackable offence.
2. Do not commit anything in writing that can be used against you later on.
3. Be classy. If she says "Good morning", cheerfully say "good morning" and start working. If she tries to make smalltalk, give short, closed answers. Don't engage her. If she persists, make an excuse to leave your desk. Go make a coffee or go and talk to someone else. If she still persists, ask your boss to move to a new desk (that's an absolute last resort).
4. Don't get caught alone with her. When dealing with her, make sure other people can see you. If you are alone with her, leave.

The last work chick who broke my heart wouldn't leave me alone but I implemented the above steps and kept my dignity.
One night she cornered me while she was drunk at a work function and tried to engage me about the situation which caused my angst.
She said: "I know you're not my biggest fan right now...."
I said: "Nah, I'm fine! If you'll excuse me I just have to go and talk to someone."
And left.
As a sidenote, I did end up banging her a couple of times before I left to go to another job and she invited herself over to "help me move my stuff".
But I just treated her like a cvm dumpster and went my merry way.

 

[goldengoose]

This is a good example of why you shouldn't mess around with co workers. You can't get rid of these women because they are always going to be around you at work. They can also cause all kinds of problems for you in the long run when they get angry at you. No reason in the world to put up with that sh1t everyday. Not sure what kind of job you have but if you want to save yourself the misery, just be cooperative with her in the work environment and let your lust for her go. Look for your sexual escapades from somebody else out of the work arena.

 

[Bingo-Player]

It depends how you want to play it

if you just want rid of her and forget about the whole thing then just follow greasy pig’s instructions

If you want revenge personally I would discreetly start fvcking someone else in the office, (preferably one of her friends) and very slowly let it trickle back to her ........will drive her nuts

Either way The texts shes sending are wanting a reaction from you - ignore

 

[The LadyKiller]

I'm somewhat in a similar situation now. Went out with a HB a few weeks back, but she turned her back on my once she realized I wasn't cutting off friends she didn't like for her. Because she's immature and therefore irrational, I follow the same advice Greasy Pig gave you:

1. Be a consummate professional in all your dealings with her. If she has to contact you about a work issue, deal with it courteously and efficiently. No smalltalk. If she contacts you about non-work stuff, ignore her. She'll soon get the message and you've done nothing overt to make her upset. If human resources comes sniffing around, ignoring non-work related emails and texts is not a sackable offence.
2. Do not commit anything in writing that can be used against you later on.
3. Be classy. If she says "Good morning", cheerfully say "good morning" and start working. If she tries to make smalltalk, give short, closed answers. Don't engage her. If she persists, make an excuse to leave your desk. Go make a coffee or go and talk to someone else. If she still persists, ask your boss to move to a new desk (that's an absolute last resort).
4. Don't get caught alone with her. When dealing with her, make sure other people can see you. If you are alone with her, leave.

As much as you'd like to rip her a new one, doing so under the wrong circumstances (work e-mail, in front of everybody at work) could get you in trouble. If you keep your cool and act as if she's not there, she'll lose it. Girls hate being ignored, they crave the attention.

 

[VladPatton]

I've been in this situation a few times and this is what you should do. To the letter.
1. Be a consummate professional in all your dealings with her. If she has to contact you about a work issue, deal with it courteously and efficiently. No smalltalk. If she contacts you about non-work stuff, ignore her. She'll soon get the message and you've done nothing overt to make her upset. If human resources comes sniffing around, ignoring non-work related emails and texts is not a sackable offence.
2. Do not commit anything in writing that can be used against you later on.
3. Be classy. If she says "Good morning", cheerfully say "good morning" and start working. If she tries to make smalltalk, give short, closed answers. Don't engage her. If she persists, make an excuse to leave your desk. Go make a coffee or go and talk to someone else. If she still persists, ask your boss to move to a new desk (that's an absolute last resort).
4. Don't get caught alone with her. When dealing with her, make sure other people can see you. If you are alone with her, leave.

The last work chick who broke my heart wouldn't leave me alone but I implemented the above steps and kept my dignity.
One night she cornered me while she was drunk at a work function and tried to engage me about the situation which caused my angst.
She said: "I know you're not my biggest fan right now...."
I said: "Nah, I'm fine! If you'll excuse me I just have to go and talk to someone."
And left.
As a sidenote, I did end up banging her a couple of times before I left to go to another job and she invited herself over to "help me move my stuff".
But I just treated her like a cvm dumpster and went my merry way.

^^^This. If you don't take this advice you need medication!