Girls who chase – reflections of game

[countermart]

Recently I’ve had three girls directly ask me to come back to their place for the night, all of whom I have said no to. I got to thinking about how being “gamed” on the other side highlights clearly some reflections of game:

• Nervousness is obvious, and not at all attractive;
  
• Posture, not just looks is significant. Poor posture is unattractive and reeks of insecurity and weakness;
  
• If the guy is not attracted to the girl the only thing she can do short of pouring a gallon of gin into you is change herself and come back later;
  
• Asking a lot of questions is an obvious seduction technique when used on you. Basically, it’s just a pain in the A to answer them;
  
• Most girls are useless at “chasing” seduction;
  
• Being overly eager and particularly neediness is a big turn off;
  
• Knocking back s*x with a woman shocks them when they know you are not gay. Paradoxically, it makes them keep coming back and trying harder;

Finally,

• Infinite pu**sy exists just one level below where you want to go lol.
  

I hope this helps some guys see their own reflections.

Countermart

 

[countermart]

Four more:

• If they are stupid enough to buy me drinks to influence me, who am I to refuse?;
  
• Am I into her, well I’m really not sure, yes I am, no I’m not, she’s on the edge of acceptable;
  
• How far can I push this chick and see if she still comes back?

and

• This is boring, why don’t I just play along to humour myself and then go home.

What I am getting at is that a lot of the things girls do to guys who try to seduce them are actually pretty easy to fall into when girls chase you.

Countermart

 

[scrouds]

I remember in my omega college days, I had this chick that really was in to me. I told her over IM I would fuuck her in the ass and make her bleed then leave. She kept coming back for more.

Very much on the fence.

 

[Zunder]

If they were decent hotness I would have gone and fvcked them all.

 

[backbreaker]

not a fan of girls who chase. I like girls who let it b en known that they want to be pursued but I am turned off by overly aggressive women.

my rationale being for a woman to be overly aggressive, it means she isn't getting hit on enough by regular men and if she just really is into me, what makes me think im' that special that she wouldn't be doing it to someone else if i were there. I don't think so mjuch of myself where I think women should just be coming up to me and macking me or anything. that's not how it's supposed to work

A feminine well adjusted woman is supposed to make it known, that she is open to being pursued, and at that point it's up to the man to either pursue or not pursue, but isn't supposed to pursue herself. That's just not right IMHO

 

[Zarky]

can't agree with that. I wish more women pursued. I'm totally turned off by a woman who sits there obviously waiting for me to come over. I purposely avoid those types. I'd rather the chick just come over and quit being such a coy b*tch.

Why? Because when a woman comes after me, I'm in the driver's seat. If I'm the supplicant, she's in the driver's seat. I have an instant aversion to putting myself into situations where someone else is in control of me.

Strangely, I have no problem with women driving me around. In fact I prefer it. Donno why that is.

LOL quite frankly, now that I think back on my life, I really don't have a lot of game breaking the ice in person because I don't put myself into situations where I have to "win" chicks over. What I do is break the ice via an automated script online, and then once the chick responds I know she's interested. Then I have game and can go from there quite easily into the bedroom, because I know she's interested.

So if you think of going from 0-60mph, I can go from 1 to 60 mph no problem, it's getting from 0 to 1 that I have the problem with. And it's a little about fear of rejection I suppose, but more about the fact that I have absolutely no idea how to start a conversation point-blank with someone I don't know, and in fact I feel like it's beneath me to do so. I've only done it twice and both times I was successful, but I never pursued those women after getting their numbers because I felt like I immediately started one step behind and would never make up that ground.

You have to understand, I'm very very acutely aware of power dynamics within relationships. Very aware. I don't have a huge problem getting women interested in me because I am able to "out alpha" them and never let them take control of the relationship. I'm not dumped because women think I'm too beta, but because they think I'm not interested in them and over time the relationship sort of rusts out because of the pent-up feelings of rejection that grow within them.

That's just me though. Strangely, my mom always said that the one who made the first move in a relationship was the one in control of the relationship, but I've never bought that.

So basically I need the woman to supplicate herself and make the first move, because once that's happened it gives me that all-important initial step ahead. I cannot bring myself to make that first move, because it seems like she's already won as soon as that happens. So it's due to fear, but not fear of rejection, fear of not being in complete control of the outcome from the very beginning. It's why I never gamble unless the odds are in my favor.

Even the word "pursue" makes me feel gross. You "pursue" glory or fame or wealth. You shouldn't have to "pursue" a person. If that person can't recognize that I'm desirable and come to me initially, then he or she doesn't deserve my time, IMHO.

Sort of a stream of consciousness post, sorry.

EDIT:

In looking at negotiating tactics, it would seem I'm not alone. For example, in salary negotiation, "He who talks first, loses":

http://www.askdebanddave.com/career-development/salary-negotiations-he-who-talks-first-loses/

And to me two people doing the mating dance are in the ultimate negotiation.

 

[zekko]

I'm not dumped because women think I'm too beta, but because they think I'm not interested in them and over time the relationship sort of rusts out because of the pent-up feelings of rejection that grow within them.

I'm glad you point this out because this sort of thing is rarely mentioned here. This is the natural consequence of the "be indifferent, never let them know they have you" game when carried too far, or rather, too long.
Of course for those of you who aren't concerned with the long term, this doesn't really matter anyway.

 

[Zarky]

I'm glad you point this out because this sort of thing is rarely mentioned here. This is the natural consequence of the "be indifferent, never let them know they have you" game when carried too far, or rather, too long.

Yeah, I played the loving beta chump very early in life, like literally in grade school. Wised up very quickly, flipped 180 degrees, and my issues are sort of the opposite of what a lot of guys go through. Instead of oneitis I have "noneitis" LOL.

But I think it's relevant to this thread because it was interesting how a previous poster looked down on women who chased. I look down on women who don't. This is because the only relationships I've ever had were with women who chased. I'm so aloof and emotionally unavailable that if they don't, the relationship either falls apart or (more likely) never starts in the first place. I've never met a woman I simply had to have. I can walk away from all of 'em, ultimately. Which is both a blessing and a curse.

 

[HariPoter13]

Firstly I apologise for posting in the mature man forum, but this thread is of interest to me. Good thread countermart, I was thinking about this stuff just recently. The points you made in your posts are really spot on.



Great posts lately bb! I agree with your position completely, men should chase women and thats how its supposed to work. I just wouldnt agree with the rationale; I know some hot women who chase men. If she doesnt approach you, you dont have a chance. She knows what she wants, and she goes for it.



Zarky, I wouldnt agree with your driver analogy. The one who initiates is the one in the drivers seat.




By the way, just recently I started realizing how important dominance is in male/female dynamics. Im turned off by dominant woman, while on the other hand, submissive woman turn me on. I also found out that the woman that turn me on, are turned on by my dominance in turn. Some funny shit. I guess femininity goes hand in hand with submissiveness, atleast for me.

 

[backbreaker]

Firstly I apologise for posting in the mature man forum, but this thread is of interest to me. Good thread countermart, I was thinking about this stuff just recently. The points you made in your posts are really spot on.



Great posts lately bb! I agree with your position completely, men should chase women and thats how its supposed to work. I just wouldnt agree with the rationale; I know some hot women who chase men. If she doesnt approach you, you dont have a chance. She knows what she wants, and she goes for it.



Zarky, I wouldnt agree with your driver analogy. The one who initiates is the one in the drivers seat.




By the way, just recently I started realizing how important dominance is in male/female dynamics. Im turned off by dominant woman, while on the other hand, submissive woman turn me on. I also found out that the woman that turn me on, are turned on by my dominance in turn. Some funny shit. I guess femininity goes hand in hand with submissiveness, atleast for me.

"hot" has nothing to do with it. A woman who chances you, is not right. she just isn't. Not flirt with you, chases you. macks you like a man macks a woman.

then again, you have to consider where I was in my last plate spinning stage. I was much more about quality than I was over quantity. I had been through the fvck anything that walk stage, and really wanted no more than 2-3 plates at most. girls who chase you, they might give it up, but they don't make for good plates in the lng run.

 

[Zunder]

Theirs a difference between women that engage you of their own accord - sh!t they may even like the look of you! What the hell is wrong with game. But a hard out "gamer" women would be somewhat of a turn off but I am yet to come across one of those.
If she floats around giving every tom dik and harry the time of day - then ok - but if she initiates convo with you then what the fuk is the problem?

 

[backbreaker]

what I find accecptable

I'm at say the mall and i'm buying some colonge, and the woman behind the counter is smiling and says sometjhing like "a know a guy like you doesn't need help getting women". that's flirting to me. that's a queue to go in fo0or the kill


what i don't find acceptable


i'm at the mall and i'm buying some colong and the woman says "damn you are good looking, you got a girlfriend? anyway, here is my number / give me your number, i can't wait to see you



the 2nd is just a red flag to me.

 

[Zarky]

woman says "damn you are good looking, you got a girlfriend? anyway, here is my number / give me your number, i can't wait to see you

the 2nd is just a red flag to me.

Well yeah, to me too, even though I like to be "chased," but moreso because that would be so unlike pretty much every single other woman on the planet that I'd think something weird was up. Like a scam or something.

If women normally behaved like that I'd be totally down! Chicks walking up to me telling me they'd like to get with me, I could get used to that.