Girls are ruining my crew

[lYlasTer]

Me and 4 guys are virtually brothers. If anyone of them were to get in a fight, I'd run to back him up even if it meant getting my ass kicked. Our friendships were inseparable, until girls came into the picture. Keep in mind we're in college.

It first started when one of my friends fell for this girl and sort of introduced each one of us to her. She is EXTREMELY FLIRTY and HB8. Well she flirted with my friend "C" and he went for it. He's an AFC to the extreme, bought her roses each Friday and got her a $150 Coach scarf for no reason. Well she told him that she just wants to be friends. Now she's coming on to me and my friend. Some of the **** she's done to me:

-Said she would date me in a heartbeat, and asked up front if I would ever date a girl like her
-Hold my arm while walking with her
-Compliments me ALL the time on how hot I look

She's doing similar things to 3 different guys, me included. I cna't help but fall for her, but deep down I know she's toying with me. I talked with her best friend and she said she was the same way back in highschool. She's not a slut at all, never had a boyfriend. Her problem is that she dosen't want to settle down so she takes a little sample of everything.

#2. I broke up with my ex-girlfriend a month ago. I've been trying to avoid her to get over her and I go to my friends to hang out for comfort. But for the past 2 weeks she's been hanging out with my friends all the time. Everytime I want to go shoot pool or watch a movie with them, she's there, long with girl #1 and some others. So lately her and "C" from the story above have been spending a LOT of time together. Every night she goes to his place to study and last night she spent the night at his place. I told him up front that all of us will beat the **** out of him if he tries anything. I trust my ex-girl and my best friend, but they are being so ****ing secretive and hush hush about it that I have no choice but to think these thoughts. I told them I would appreciate it if they cooled it down a bit. I don't mind if they're friends, but I don't want them seeing each other every night.

Right now I'm feeling distanced from my crew. I got my cellphone off and AOL off. I don't want to talk to anyone right now because I feel betrayed. I got a test in a few hours and I'm on this forum venting my anger because I can't concentrate on studying.

Guys remember, BROS BEFORE HOS DAMMIT.

 

[Paintballguy]

A similiar thing happened with me and my friends except the girl didnt break us apart. It started out by my friend introducing me to this girl that he went to school with. I ended up doing her at a party then I pretty much dumped her. She then pretty much slept with all my other friends in my crew. But yea, she is pretty much a slut/attention *****.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by lYlasTer
So lately her and "C" from the story above have been spending a LOT of time together. Every night she goes to his place to study and last night she spent the night at his place. I told him up front that all of us will beat the **** out of him if he tries anything. I trust my ex-girl and my best friend, but they are being so ****ing secretive and hush hush about it that I have no choice but to think these thoughts. I told them I would appreciate it if they cooled it down a bit. I don't mind if they're friends, but I don't want them seeing each other every night.

Dude, you're in extreme denial. Whether it's right or not, whether you believe it or not, the reality is that people with nothing to hide don't hide things. Your ex is not just innocently spending a lot of time with one of your best bros and is not just innocently spending the night at his place.

I do hate to be the bearer of bad news, though.

 

[lYlasTer]

Re: Re: Girls are ruining my crew

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova
Dude, you're in extreme denial. Whether it's right or not, whether you believe it or not, the reality is that people with nothing to hide don't hide things. Your ex is not just innocently spending a lot of time with one of your best bros and is not just innocently spending the night at his place.

I do hate to be the bearer of bad news, though.

That's why I'm in conflict. If I was looking at this situation on the outside, I would agree with you. It would make sense, each of them got dumped so they turn to each other for love. But I was with my girlfriend for two years, they KNOW NOT TO **** WITH ME. I asked her why she was so secretive about it, she said it's because she knows I'd get mad. No **** I'm gonna be mad stupid *****. I made each of them look me in the eye and tell me that nothing's going on, and they are just friends. I laid down the law, if they decide to do **** then they know they will have to pay a price.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by lYlasTer
Me and 4 guys are virtually brothers. If anyone of them were to get in a fight, I'd run to back him up even if it meant getting my ass kicked. Our friendships were inseparable, until girls came into the picture. Keep in mind we're in college.

It first started when one of my friends fell for this girl and sort of introduced each one of us to her. She is EXTREMELY FLIRTY and HB8. Well she flirted with my friend "C" and he went for it. He's an AFC to the extreme, bought her roses each Friday and got her a $150 Coach scarf for no reason. Well she told him that she just wants to be friends. Now she's coming on to me and my friend. Some of the **** she's done to me:

-Said she would date me in a heartbeat, and asked up front if I would ever date a girl like her
-Hold my arm while walking with her
-Compliments me ALL the time on how hot I look

She's doing similar things to 3 different guys, me included. I cna't help but fall for her, but deep down I know she's toying with me. I talked with her best friend and she said she was the same way back in highschool. She's not a slut at all, never had a boyfriend. Her problem is that she dosen't want to settle down so she takes a little sample of everything.

Tell your friend "C" that the girl's a slut and to stop treating her like a princess. Be honest with a brotha'. She's leading your boy around like an emaciated hound with a chain collar...why don't you help him out NOW like you would if he was in a fight? He's in a fight for his MANHOOD.

#2. I broke up with my ex-girlfriend a month ago. I've been trying to avoid her to get over her and I go to my friends to hang out for comfort. But for the past 2 weeks she's been hanging out with my friends all the time. Everytime I want to go shoot pool or watch a movie with them, she's there, long with girl #1 and some others. So lately her and "C" from the story above have been spending a LOT of time together. Every night she goes to his place to study and last night she spent the night at his place. I told him up front that all of us will beat the **** out of him if he tries anything. I trust my ex-girl and my best friend, but they are being so ****ing secretive and hush hush about it that I have no choice but to think these thoughts. I told them I would appreciate it if they cooled it down a bit. I don't mind if they're friends, but I don't want them seeing each other every night.

Ah...now I see why. You're a b!tch.

Look, she's done with you and you're done with her. Why do you CARE if she's banging your friends after the fact, as long as she wasn't cheating with them while you two were together? There's no reason why you should be prohibiting your friend from seeing your old slut for some action (to wean him off the other girl)...especially not threatening to beat him up over it.

Was it an extremely BAD break-up? If not, there's no reason you should be unwilling to hang with your buddies when she's around. You're letting a chick come between you and your friends. You say you've got your buddy's back, but that's not what I see. I see a jealous, insecure, dog-eat-dog environment and you're as much to blame as anyone.

Right now I'm feeling distanced from my crew. I got my cellphone off and AOL off. I don't want to talk to anyone right now because I feel betrayed. I got a test in a few hours and I'm on this forum venting my anger because I can't concentrate on studying.

Stop acting like a teenage girl on PMS. Focus on what's IMPORTANT, meaning your friends and your studies. Stop feeling all betrayed and heartbroken and like you're the star of your own soap opera...you're overdramatizing petty sh!t and it's taking a toll on you. Get over it, grab your balls, and get your head straight.

Guys remember, BROS BEFORE HOS DAMMIT.

EXACTLY.

 

[jason86]

The exact same situation happened with my crew when we were at school man. This girl went out with one of my mates, they were with eachother for a month, he then broke up with her. During this time just like the girl you know, she was a serious flirt. She would flirt with me and another mate of mine (the one she later out with), on a very serious level.

So anyway after they broke up, the girl then texted my other mate of mine (which sucked coz i would of thought i was at 2nd choice lol) the NEXT DAY! on whether he wanted to go out with her. He then asked my mate, he was cool about it and she then started chilling with us constantly. I was a bit surprised he said yes as i was expecting a bit of a weird atmosphere while we chilled at school but seriously everything was very cool, no problems at all.

My mate who went out with her first, was a DJ and didnt even give a **** and just went and dealt with another girl the next week. Nothing changed between my two mates. Nothing. They actually used to joke about with eachother how nice her piece of titties felt lol. Trust me it was totally cool.

So if my mate was cool with it? You can. But difference is, you probably still got feelings for her? Am i right?

 

[icecreaman]

I dont know about you guys but I wouldnt date a girl my boy use to date. All that s#@t does is bring drama.

 

[A-Unit]

Disagree.

THERE'S NO BRO'S or HOE'S.

On the battlefield of mating, no one has first dibs. While I don't go for the leavens of a good friend, I don't sacrifice my own happiness for that of my friends. I have been, and you can be, screwed over just as bad with friends as you can with girls. Girls, it's a natural fact of life that they come and go, and that only 1 of them will last to the end. While we'll befriend LOTS of people, we don't know WHO could backstab us. And yes, they do backstab you. Because while you're loving the friendship, days do get down and they get down on girls and meet someone you shouldn't have but do...and bam.

Bottom line back away from the whole thing. Friends, girls, everything. You can't change this girl, and unless you WANT to be involved, don't be. Take what control you can.

And yes, I *used* to have friends like that, but when it started ruining my life, I reprioritized. Not that I'm not there, but in some way, each person has their own debt to you, whether its emotional, financial, or otherwise...

Some borrow money and won't repay. Some covet girls that you have and wouldn't tell you. Just watch your back and don't be so naive about your friends. If push came to shove and ***** was thrown at his face, he'd tag that and hope you don't find out. And if you did, he'd take the chances and deal with the consequences later.

I'd recommend reading the mafia articles on Askmen.com to brush on how to handle your crew.



GL,


A-Unit

 

[icecreaman]

Re: Disagree.

Originally posted by A-Unit
THERE'S NO BRO'S or HOE'S.

On the battlefield of mating, no one has first dibs. While I don't go for the leavens of a good friend, I don't sacrifice my own happiness for that of my friends. I have been, and you can be, screwed over just as bad with friends as you can with girls. Girls, it's a natural fact of life that they come and go, and that only 1 of them will last to the end. While we'll befriend LOTS of people, we don't know WHO could backstab us. And yes, they do backstab you. Because while you're loving the friendship, days do get down and they get down on girls and meet someone you shouldn't have but do...and bam.

Bottom line back away from the whole thing. Friends, girls, everything. You can't change this girl, and unless you WANT to be involved, don't be. Take what control you can.

And yes, I *used* to have friends like that, but when it started ruining my life, I reprioritized. Not that I'm not there, but in some way, each person has their own debt to you, whether its emotional, financial, or otherwise...

Some borrow money and won't repay. Some covet girls that you have and wouldn't tell you. Just watch your back and don't be so naive about your friends. If push came to shove and ***** was thrown at his face, he'd tag that and hope you don't find out. And if you did, he'd take the chances and deal with the consequences later.

I'd recommend reading the mafia articles on Askmen.com to brush on how to handle your crew.



GL,


A-Unit

I agree 100%. There are a lot of shady cats out there that you think are your friends but once some pu55y gets in the mix, people start to think with the little head. Ive been played by people that I grew up with and let me tell you, its the worst feelin in the world to know your own friends could s#@t on you. WATCH YOUR BACK AND DONT TRUST ANYBODY!!!!!!

 

[flexion_]

Bro's before Ho's.

If you are in College and you are hanging with a bunch of guys in a dorm - they aren't your Bro's. If you have a friend you've known for 5 years and has been there for ya' and such - thats a Bro.

If he ain't a Bro then its a free-for-all and vice versa.

 

[digitalrat]

I really didnt want to reply, because I felt you werent going to take my advice to heart. You are being guided by your heart, now this is not a bad thing. Don't let anybody tell you that it is. Now, being guided by your heart isnt a smart thing. Not bad, but not smart either.

Let your mind guide you. Never let your heart take control.

I would let it all go. Dont be mad at your "friend" thats hooking up with your ex-gf. Now, I know that you are, but if you want to get the upper hand, seem aloft.

 

[lYlasTer]

Okay guys a little update. I'm sure there's nothing going on with my best friend and my ex-girlfriend, He told me straight up he wouldn't do anything behind my back and he isn't attracted to her. They just hang out all the time because she needs someone to talk to and he's the only she feels can relate to him. He's the one helping her get over me. They were secretive because they knew I'd get mad.

As for girl #2, all 3 of us decided to just blow it off with her. We call her up to hang out with us or waht not and she says she has a lot of homework to do. Turns out she was with this guy we know out celebrating his birthday. She's such a sweet and nice girl. But a ***** is a *****.

We put the cards on the table tonight and we decided, the crew's for life. We can introduce girls and hang out with them, but when they start becoming our "friends" and there's some romantic connections, that's when **** hits the fan.

 

[tom121]

yeah i feel you

few of my buddies choses to hang out with his girl instead of me

well **** them