Girlfriend?

[Sebastian2005]

Hey guys, I just started texting on messenger with a girl that is really awesome and my type.

But sometimes I feel like she is making it hard for me.

Context:

For example she was asking me if I know some guy named XYZ from my school. I said no and why she wants to know.

She said nothing.. and moved on with convo.

And she also said yesterday something like ”I cannot find a right man for me..”

Are these some type of games to make me want to get her?

Ngl it’s turning me on.

And I’m sure she likes me because she is sending me voice messages some emojis, jokes and her stories from daily life.

But I hope she doesn’t see me as a just friend.

And for example today she just read what I wrote yesterday before midnight and convo stopped so not sure if I should write something or am I just overthinking?

And how to move it to date? I thought about bowling seems like fun.

Would appreciate your help guys.

 

[Clockwerk50]

There is so much wrong with your post, but I think it stems from the fact that it seems you haven't read any material out there.

Maybe start with this quick article from SoSuave; someone else might be able to point out what else you should dive on since I am not sure what links I can post her. Alternatively you can shoot me a PM. Long story short, texting is for logistics, she is just not that into you, don’t tolerate disrespectful behaviour, and she is not yours it is just your turn.

My advice is to move on.

Why Texting a Woman Too Much Is Bad

The more you text, the more common you seem. What king, what warrior wastes his time playing with a high school girl's toy.

www.sosuave.com

 

[RangerMIke]

I suppose it would be easier if she just came out and said "You are not my type, we have no chemistry, stop wasting your time with me because it isn't happening"

But most women don't do this... they behave like this woman...

Too many men, when they hear "I can't find the right man." think they have a shot. What they don't realize is she has included them in the group that they are NOT the 'right man'. If she thought you were the 'right man' she wouldn't say anything, she would just go after them.

When most women parade or talk about other men in front of you, she isn't trying to make you jealous... she is telling you that this is what she wants, and you are not it.

So what should the OP do? Well... he can just make her a 'friend' that is likely what I would do, having female friends does have advantages, but you also have to have the emotional maturity to place her firming in the 'sister' category. This means when she goes through these emotional rollercoaster of dating... there will be very brief periods of time when she might find you interesting. Even when this happens you cannot lose emotional self-control you have to tell her "What the fvck are you doing? Damn girl you know you aren't interested." Don't go along with it, don't think you can turn her into a FWB. FWB situations only work when the woman is physically attracted to a man, but otherwise not interested.... something like this is the exact opposite... she is not physically attracted, but otherwise interested because of something else.

Sex is physical attraction, interest is what keeps that going. Without initial physical attraction creating any long-term relationship is very hard and honestly not very pleasant. You get that 'Honeymoon Phase", which lasts a few months... that's physical attraction... and as this moves on, the man's personality and behaver will keep this going as interest builds. But if you do not have that initial 'butterflies' and animal attraction up front, you have NOTHING to build on. Your 'relationship' is a house without foundation.

Never settle for anything other than in the beginning a woman that cannot keep her eyes and hands off you. If the OP wasn't getting this right from the start with this woman, my best advice is to find one of the 4 billion other women in the world that will find them sexually attractive. It's much easier and better for a man's long term mental well-being NOT to go chasing after women who. if they get them, will only use them.

 

[SW15]

This interaction is not much of anything. It's a gigantic waste of time. She is not a girlfriend and is not likely to ever be one. She's not likely to ever go on a first date with you. She's also not likely to ever have sex with you.

Text-based communication is generally a waste of time. Focus on making the majority of communication in real life settings. Millennials and Generation Z often have a difficult time with this concept. Some of the oldest Millennials (late 30s/early 40s) can remember a time before when text-based communication was dominant and even some of them fall into traps with texting too much.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

But sometimes I feel like she is making it hard for me.

If the attraction is mutual, she wouldn't make it hard for you or play games that might make you lose attraction. If you look at your own post from that perspective, you'll see the attraction is definitely one-sided. Your side, not hers.

 

[Gamisch]

If the attraction is mutual, she wouldn't make it hard for you or play games that might make you lose attraction. If you look at your own post from that perspective, you'll see the attraction is definitely one-sided. Your side, not hers.

Its sad to see how many young men are sexually/ltr -starved these days. ANY woman that interacts with them is seen as a potential wife/gf.

Even of OP would get our "magic text that will make her fall in love!", he wouldn't be able to keep her, and thus lose her in a dramatic fashion.

It's really sad.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Its sad to see how many young men are sexually/ltr -starved these days. ANY woman that interacts with them is seen as a potential wife/gf.
Even of OP would get our "magic text that will make her fall in love!", he wouldn't be able to keep her, and thus lose her in a dramatic fashion.
It's really sad.

The sad part is also the expectations raised by living online too much. Some silly bint says she won't date anyone who isn't 6-6-6 and young men start worrying about not being able to find a gf because they have to have six-six-six or be 'undateable'.
And when they start thinking that they're undateable, they become undateable, because they 'pre-reject' themselves.

 

[Giovanni SouthSide]

I'd argue worshipping cyber women is ruining men's mental health.

If men weren't so enamored and addicted to worshipping pvssy, men wouldn't have mental health problems.

Sebastian, for your own well being, drop talking to strange women online for now. Go outside. Reconnect with solid friends, do some risky sh!t, make money, pump iron, volunteer at the dog shelter etc.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

How do you know she is really awesome or just your type? You don't even know her.

This is the type of stuff guys that lack options and experience with women tend to say.

OP, calm down. Stop acting like a love sick puppy dog and stop attributing positive traits this woman has not earned for free.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]