girlfriend talked to guy she used to hook up with

[sourcy]

This is all you need to know. Why on Earth would that be something she always talks about? Who always talks about someone they don't want to F? Always talks about?

You have a problem with this one.

she said she regretted it when it was brought up when I asked her about everything.
another funny line was "he was drunk and i just went along with it" - lol, called her out on this. obviously you are not just going along with it, you wanted to hook up with him especially if you did more with him than that. I'm not weetarded

Look, I really think some of you are restating things I already know.
- yes, she probably did more than just get fingered by him
- yes, she probably found him really attractive
- yes, she was probably mad that he would not do anything more than try to smash (if he didnt)


These are all valid points, but wtf can I do about it now?
Break up with her?
Continue to be pissed about it even though now, 6 months later it is a non-issue?

idk lol

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Whats the problem? Her past? If your still tripping over the past go find yourself a virgin. The past is the past and you can't do jack sh!t about it. If she still talks to the dude however then that is very disrespectful to you and you need to check her on that

/end of thread

 

[SgtSplacker]

Anyways girls just love to have "that guy".. there's always someone seemingly hiding in the shadows of any girls past. They love that sheet, keeps us on our toes is what it does. Heck if I was a female I would do the same thing lol.

 

[Orchard]

These are all valid points, but wtf can I do about it now?

Well you have a lot of options, some better than others.

Break up with her?

Yeah, you could do that but I think it's not the most logical thing I've ever heard. A lot of people will tell you this is the best course of action, especially people in the seduction community, as a "nip it in the bud" sort of reasoning but I disagree. Yeah you can save yourself the heartache of being in a relationship if every time something you don't like happens you run away.

Yet, to me at least, that isn't actually being with someone. It comes with the territory that if you are trying to be with someone there is going to be work involved. Things never just happen and problems don't magically solve themselves. Your early relationships are what essentially amounts to training exercises. And if the only response you learn is to break-up then I hope you enjoy being alone.

Now if you try and put aside your insecurities and learn to trust and work with your partner then you will be much better at handling any new situations that arise.

It is of course entirely possible that she is lying and cheating, but instantly breaking up with everyone you suspect of something doesn't teach you how to actually tell if they are guilty. Giving people the benefit of the doubt and getting burned is much better for your development than burning every bridge that looks at you funny.

Continue to be pissed about it even though now, 6 months later it is a non-issue?

You're a big boy. You'll get over it. But kicking a person you've spent half a year with out of your life won't help.

Yeah, you won't have to look at her and be reminded of it, but you think those same feelings won't be replaced by something else? If you're insecure, and unable to cope, breaking up won't make you secure and confident. If I had to take a wild guess your feeling of jealousy would just be transferred to another part of your life and then onto your next partner.

idk lol

I think you do know, you're just holding yourself back for what ever reason.

 

[SgtSplacker]

Orchard I would assume your an anglo type person because of your very passive attitude about this. Not everyone is willing to accept someones improper treatment as a lesson learned.

I would assume you are male. As a male I prefer to take a more authoritarian role with those intimately involved in my life from my parents to my girlfriend, everyone has to play a fair game with me. Sourcy already suggested his body was strong, now his mind needs to follow. It's not easy being the leader of those around you. There are lessons of fairness and proper conduct any leader needs to learn. That's why I suggested earlier that he talks to that man face to face, privately. So he begins to learn to negotiate a possibly hostile situation. This is how men are made. Not sitting around passively learning the lessons people are teaching him.

 

[SMS 48]

Forget your jealousy. The bottom line is your girl is a liar. If she was a fukk buddy, it would be acceptable (and your behavior wouldn't be). But since you're committing to her, why accept her lying?

I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than be with someone with no character or class.