Girlfriend saw my sexting on Facebook !!!!

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
3 days ago while i was with my girlfriend in her office, i went to my facebook page from her lap top and openend a message concerning another woman i met before. The next day when she was going through her "history" tab on the computer, she clicked on the facebook tab and saw the entire conversation. This really disturbed her. I tried to convince her that it was just plain talk and nothing serious. She is really disappointed about the whole situation. I tried calling her yesterday but she didn't call back. I am going the No Contact rule. My pictures are still on her Facebook page. I am wondering what's going to happen from now on. What do you guys think she is going through ? I am planning on giving her some time to herself to think about the situation. I wonder if we are going to break up ? Any advice ?
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
No .... She was not around me when i opened the messages ..... She saw it the next day when she was browsing through her History tab
 

Create self-fulfilling prophecies. Always assume the positive. Assume she likes you. Assume she wants to talk to you. Assume she wants to go out with you. When you think positive, positive things happen.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

sylvester the cat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 30, 2012
Messages
1,695
Reaction score
98
If I found out my gfriend had been sexting another guy - she would be history. No questions asked. If only for my own self-respect and dignity and to convey to her the message that I am not to be trifled with.

Whether or not your gfriend will do the same will depend on what she values more. You or her self-respect. Either way it is a lose-lose situation for you. Only time will have the answer.
 

CrimsonPanther

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2013
Messages
386
Reaction score
36
i don't judge, i am not a saint either, but you HAVE to play it smart :)
in all cases, you assume some risks that have consequences. if it will be over, next her. not because she would be low quality, but because when a relationship loses trust, there is no worth continuing. just my opinion.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
CrimsonPanther said:
i don't judge, i am not a saint either, but you HAVE to play it smart :)
in all cases, you assume some risks that have consequences. if it will be over, next her. not because she would be low quality, but because when a relationship loses trust, there is no worth continuing. just my opinion.
I would love to next her, but my mind is playing games at the moment. I feel nostalgic thinking of her and i miss her. I wish i could turn back time but i can't. I feel like Sh*t at the moment. It sucks. I know time will heal but minutes pass by so slowly. At this moment i don't know if we broke up already or she's the type who does not reveal the break-up. Only time can tell. Thinking of the good times i had with her and now not having it seems and feels empty inside of me. I can go through this but i need some time. I don't like this feeling of dependance.
 

CrimsonPanther

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2013
Messages
386
Reaction score
36
Sir_Laid_A_Lot said:
I would love to next her, but my mind is playing games at the moment. I feel nostalgic thinking of her and i miss her. I wish i could turn back time but i can't. I feel like Sh*t at the moment. It sucks. I know time will heal but minutes pass by so slowly. At this moment i don't know if we broke up already or she's the type who does not reveal the break-up. Only time can tell. Thinking of the good times i had with her and now not having it seems and feels empty inside of me. I can go through this but i need some time. I don't like this feeling of dependance.

this feeling appears when you don't spin plates :)
look at this as an opportunity to begin it. spin plates, do sexting if you like it, i'd do it too if i'd be good in the texting game, but me being more of a face2face type of guy, i am not too experienced with that. but seems like fun.

also, don't listen to all the white knighting here, you don't need to explain yourself to noone. just accept the consequences.

you can always play the girl's game by switching the responsibility. blame her neglecting you for your sexting. maybe she'll bite. also, be nice, suggest that you also want this situation solved. "work together" to make this relationship better. you know, BS that women usually play on guys. they are not immune to their own mind games, so worth a try. just be smart :)

most important: SPIN PLATES.
 

user name

Banned
Joined
Sep 24, 2013
Messages
342
Reaction score
16
CrimsonPanther said:
this feeling appears when you don't spin plates :)
look at this as an opportunity to begin it. spin plates, do sexting if you like it, i'd do it too if i'd be good in the texting game, but me being more of a face2face type of guy, i am not too experienced with that. but seems like fun.

also, don't listen to all the white knighting here, you don't need to explain yourself to noone. just accept the consequences.

you can always play the girl's game by switching the responsibility. blame her neglecting you for your sexting. maybe she'll bite. also, be nice, suggest that you also want this situation solved. "work together" to make this relationship better. you know, BS that women usually play on guys. they are not immune to their own mind games, so worth a try. just be smart :)

most important: SPIN PLATES.
Spinning plates doesn't appear to be his problem. It's keeping his girlfriend from discovering them which seems to be his problem.
 

JoeMarron

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 25, 2012
Messages
1,311
Reaction score
64
Age
33
Haaa you're a dumbass for opening that sh!t on HER laptop. Come on man, if you're gonna cheat at least be smart enough to be discreet about it
 

Yewki

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 6, 2013
Messages
1,525
Reaction score
598
By the way it wasn't really history tab that got you, but if that's her wording it means she was intentionally reviewing all the websites you went to... which is funny. FB kept you logged in because you never logged out, and when she clicked FB from the history tab while she was snooping over where you went it brought her to the site... except, the computer was still logged in to your account. If you had logged out, or cleared the cookies, you would have been fine.
 

skinnyguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 2, 2013
Messages
3,446
Reaction score
1,258
I would guess the standard response on SOS would be "keep her around for sex while you keep spinning plates. relationships are for faggots".

obviously you have a real connection with her. either she forgives you or she doesn't. if she doesn't don't beat yourself up over it.
 

smooth_as_silk

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 10, 2001
Messages
128
Reaction score
5
Subconciously, they dig it when you're able to pull attractive girls.
GO NC, spin plates and let her get back to you... she will definitely.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
JoeMarron said:
Haaa you're a dumbass for opening that sh!t on HER laptop. Come on man, if you're gonna cheat at least be smart enough to be discreet about it
It was like a freak accident. I am sure i logged off, like i always do after i use Facebook. Even if she clicked on the History tab of my Facebook, the system should atleast ask for my password before entering the Message page.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
CrimsonPanther said:
this feeling appears when you don't spin plates :)
look at this as an opportunity to begin it. spin plates, do sexting if you like it, i'd do it too if i'd be good in the texting game, but me being more of a face2face type of guy, i am not too experienced with that. but seems like fun.

also, don't listen to all the white knighting here, you don't need to explain yourself to noone. just accept the consequences.

you can always play the girl's game by switching the responsibility. blame her neglecting you for your sexting. maybe she'll bite. also, be nice, suggest that you also want this situation solved. "work together" to make this relationship better. you know, BS that women usually play on guys. they are not immune to their own mind games, so worth a try. just be smart :)

most important: SPIN PLATES.
I have been spinning plates. But they haven't materialized into anything at the moment. It's still in the beginning stages of the pursue, whereas i've been with my girlfriend for just over a year.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
Yewki said:
By the way it wasn't really history tab that got you, but if that's her wording it means she was intentionally reviewing all the websites you went to... which is funny. FB kept you logged in because you never logged out, and when she clicked FB from the history tab while she was snooping over where you went it brought her to the site... except, the computer was still logged in to your account. If you had logged out, or cleared the cookies, you would have been fine.
Now this got me thinking. I am pretty sure i logged out of Facebook, which i always do since it's become a habit. Maybe it was one of those rare occasions when i forgot to log off of Facebook. Damn ..... i don't believe this. The irony of it all. The funny thing is, she told me she was going through the history tab to review songs on youtube she had previously opened and somehow came across my tab and curiosity got the better of her and she opened the tab. I wish i could turn back time. But it's not going to be that way. I called her yesterday night and we talked for a long while. I apologized for all that. We almost broke up. I told her i will make up for that and take her for dinner tonight. She said "I'll think about it". I will give her a call later today and hopefully take her out tonight.
 

Trixx

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 5, 2013
Messages
26
Reaction score
4
Basically you did the same thing as cheat on her. So if she's willing to forgive you then you'll be lucky. But fortunately, a lot of couples still stay together, it just depends on how much self-respect she has.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
smooth_as_silk said:
Subconciously, they dig it when you're able to pull attractive girls.
GO NC, spin plates and let her get back to you... she will definitely.
Yeah, women are attracted to guys who can attract more women, even better if they are really attractive.

However, she was really disappointed with me. She told me she didn't expect me to be like this. We almost broke up over this. The funny thing is, we were going so well till now and then sh*t hits the fan and everything started going downhill. Maybe this is a test of how strong this relationship is and whether it's worth the effort to carry on with the relationship.
 

Sir_Laid_A_Lot

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2013
Messages
115
Reaction score
7
skinnyguy said:
I would guess the standard response on SOS would be "keep her around for sex while you keep spinning plates. relationships are for faggots".

obviously you have a real connection with her. either she forgives you or she doesn't. if she doesn't don't beat yourself up over it.
I have a feeling she might forgive me. I called her yesterday night and apologized to her. It was a really long talk, not something that we've done so far in this relationship. Usually when i call her, it's for a very brief moment and i just set up the date and tell her what time i will pick her up. When she calls me the calls last slightly longer but not too long. I keep my phone conversations very brief and save the talks for face to face conversations during dinner and dates. But yesterday night was completely different. She was not feeling that good about herself and the situation. I reassured her that everything's fine and that i wanted to make up to her and take her out for dinner. I hope things work out for the better.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Top