Girlfriend mistakenly calls me by former BF name

[charlestheis_theiii]

My 6 month LTR has mistakenly called me by her previous boyfriend's name a couple of times within the last six months.

How should I react to this? Is this a sign of disrespect towards me?

While just on the phone with her, she conferenced me in with a tech support rep trying to fix her PC, and when introducing me to the tech guy on the other line, she said "Bill....I mean Fred(that's my name)". She then said my name a couple of times to a minute or two later in the conversation.

How should I respond or follow up with her? Should I let her know if pissed me off, or would that be a sign that I failed the **** test?

Just ignore it?

 

[frivolousz21]

well I was with a girl once..who called me by her x bf's last name on accident about a month into the relationship....we had the same first name...however she fell in love and we were together for 3 yrs.

so I dont know...but 6 months is a long time for that kind of mistake!

 

[Marf]

personally, i would take it pretty bad...it's not really a good thing...
But remember; this is only my highly PERSONAL opinion...

 

[Qmanchoo]

Yes, if you ignore the problem it will go away and stop pissing you off.

No, of course not.

It doesn't sound like a shyt test to me, sometimes it's really hard to get an EX out of your head depending on how emotioanlly intense your relationship was. I've never forgotten any GF I've ever had and can vividly picture a lot of the things we did together in my head. You end up doing lots of similar things with GF's and those can bring back strong memories.

Ok, fluffy shyt aside...if it's pissing you off it's not going to stop pissing you off when it happens again. If it were my GF I'd just casually bring it up with her and tell her exactly what you think about it...casually, very key not to make a big deal out of it...because if she hasn't been able to get the EX completely off her mind in 6 months it might be a touchy point.

On the other hand, if things seem to be going well with you guys and this happens very infrequently (a couple of times over 6 months?) it might not even be worth bringing up. It's up to you, just think about it. Bringing it up casually wont ruin your relationship or anything...

 

[PimpNHard]

You could ignore if you want, but if the name still rolls off the tongue that easily its probably one that she [still] says quite frequently, OR maybe she is still adjusting (snicker) after six months! You said she has said it several times already, so obviously its a common name for her even after six months. Like I said do what you like - just use your head.

 

[jprjrjr]

See, you might call me a woman hater ( which I'm not), but I think guys are too soft on women in these situations. It's DISRESPECTFUL for her to do this to you, intentional or not. Tell her you find it offensive, and if it happens again, she can take a hike.

Being too understanding with women has led to the fiasco we're facing now. Don't be a jerk, but don't put up with nonsense either.

 

[mrRuckus]

Originally posted by charlestheis_theiii
My 6 month LTR has mistakenly called me by her previous boyfriend's name a couple of times within the last six months.

How should I react to this? Is this a sign of disrespect towards me?

While just on the phone with her, she conferenced me in with a tech support rep trying to fix her PC, and when introducing me to the tech guy on the other line, she said "Bill....I mean Fred(that's my name)". She then said my name a couple of times to a minute or two later in the conversation.

How should I respond or follow up with her? Should I let her know if pissed me off, or would that be a sign that I failed the **** test?

Just ignore it?

It's like any other habit. You just do it without thinking. I really don't think it's a big deal.

Would you get pissed when your mom calls you by your brother's name? My mom sometimes calls me by both my brothers names before getting the right one. And no she's just not old and insane.

I would probably tease her about it once or twice and ignore it after that. Say something like if she can't remember the right name then you can't remember to use the right hole.

 

[penguin]

Originally posted by SuperGigaloDJ
I'd just start calling her my X's name.

during sex.

If it's offensive to you, let her know that it can't happen again. If it happens again after that, give her the cold shoulder etc. if she gets a third strike, cya.

I think that's more than fair. Could you imagine the complaining you'd be put through if the roles were reversed?

 

[Kaine]

"My 6 month LTR has mistakenly called me by her previous boyfriend's name a couple of times within the last six months.

How should I react to this? Is this a sign of disrespect towards me?"


I'm starting to think this forum is populated by witch hunters. Grasshopper, reread your text in [bold]. Are these isolated incidents outside of anything else. If they are.... then she is not disrespecting you. However you should take the opportunity and bust her on it. Tease her about her poor memory and do something melodramatic in a funny i.e.


When you guys are cuddling act up and say


"Oh Mandy, you are the light of my life, I feel so close to...., **** did I just call you Mandy. Wait Mandy was girlfriend number 98, what's your name again?"


Make it playful, this will increase attraction AND get your point across.


Kaine

 

[djbr]

*BIG* red flag.

If she did this, she is thinking about him. Why?

Dude, you better have some options. I assume that if you're obsessing about things like this, better start focusing on some self-improvement.

I'm not saying that this was not important. In fact, it is. BUT the fact that you're worried shows much things about you. If you had options:

1) the possibilities of something like this happening drop to something like 0%.
2) if it happened anyway, you will be out quickly to your next prospect.

Don't worry, I came from some similar situation. Invest some time in yourself. It will pay off in the long run.

About this situation, I think it IS a reason for at least some kind of turn around. Do not show too much emotion towards her for some time. This may help.

But, what if you had 10 other girls waiting in line for you? Think about this.

 

[mrRuckus]

Originally posted by penguin

I think that's more than fair. Could you imagine the complaining you'd be put through if the roles were reversed?

...and how ridiculous you would think she was being making a big issue about it?

 

[Muppet]

She called you that because she has his name going through her head, she is thinking about him or maybe even talking to him a lot still.

 

[djbr]

Originally posted by mrRuckus
...and how ridiculous you would think she was being making a big issue about it?

They always make. I did this once. Hehe, what a show .

But if it affects him, he can't just pretend that he is not affected by it. If he is, better solve it FAST. If he is not, well... OK

 

[Kaine]

little, little boys....

If these are isolated incidents then

acting paranoid on something as trivial as this makes you appear needy and insecure


You can let it rest until something more significant turns up or you can blow it up and look like a **** if there is nothing insidious about it.


Once again, you can bust her on it and get your point across and still come across as a confident secure man...


Or you can cause some drama, look needy, cause her to want space and look down on you for been insecure.


Stop feeding his paranoia


Kaine

 

[Qualtran]

Sure its annoying but I don't think you should be worried. Seriously some people just get names confused in their heads. I'm definitely one of those people, and I've mistakenly called gf's the name of an ex, even though that ex was way in the past. Its not disrespect, its just dislexia or something like that.