Girlfriend is withholding sex!!! WTF???

[Engetsu]

Last night, I was with my girlfriend, and I was coming on to her pretty hard, since we got back together a week ago and we haven't had sex for a little more than a month. I was being aggressive, obviously, but she wasn't giving me any of it back. The only times that she came to kiss me is when she would do something wrong and she would be sorry for it. Oh, and she has her period.

Then she told me that she feels like I always want something to happen, and that she doesn't want to have sex. In fact, she got bored of sex and wants to stop doing it for a while because we did it so often that it became less special to her, and she wants it to be something special. I told her that she wasn't being communicative enough with me in the past, and instead of jumping to conclusions like that, she should tell me her likes and dislikes, and so she did tell me a couple. I also told her that we never did it too often... Our max was once a week. Then I told her that if she truly loved and was attracted to me, she wouldn't care about having sex every day. Her answer to that is that she wants it to be more special...

I get the feeling I wasn't firm enough and she didn't change her decision.

Is her reaction normal? Should I have told her that I can't be in a stricly emotional relationship where the physical is not present? To me, people need to express their love in different ways, and not showing it physically is not good.

I don't need this **** ****ing with my head right when college starts...

 

[Hollowpoint]

Random points:

-No offense, but in my mind the HUGE possibility is that you may suck at it.

- Once a week is not often at all, I was thinking you guys did it like 5-7 times a day.

-Did you kiss her like you did when you first started?
That is a big part of 'wow he changed for the worse.'

-She is on her freaking period man.....

-Find more women.

 

[Hot Ice]

It sounds like you've done the same show almost every time you've banged her...

Right?

 

[Engetsu]

It's the first girl I've ever been with, but I guess Hot Ice is right, I have 4 or 5 positions that I use on a very regular basis. I guess I became unoriginal in my originality...

Now... How to make her beg for it again?

 

[jbbrain]

do a search...


dont be as lazy looking for the right threads as you are in the sack!

sir chancelot has a great guide, I keep it posted on my celing every night before my gf drains my ballz.

 

[DJBen]

Doing it in four different positions doesnt make it exciting.

Start stuff in public, tease her for ages, be really dominant with her one time, and a lot less dominant the next time. Make it sleazy, make it normal. Theres loads of little things you can do to keep it exciting.

I'd suggest one of the threads in the bible to get some sex tips. That, and look around on google. More 2/3's of the net is about sex, relationships, porn, and FAQ's about those three things. I'm sure you'll strike gold

Something that worked for me in my second proper relationship was to stop showing all signs of wanting it. Go completely cold turkey on it. It made her wonder what the hell was going on, and she became hell bent on getting me to screw her. That picked things up again and I was a lot more dominant, treated her more like a slut in the bedroom, did stuff in public, played about with bondage stuff etc. She loved it and wanted it more than I did! I cant say it'll work for anyone else/work again though

 

[NewMan]

It's got not the # of positions that doing it at all.

Your young.

You obviously want sex more often than she want's it with you.

there is something to be said for compatibility.

You will be fighting with her over sex for the entire time you will be with her. She will not give it up to you as much as you want it.

Your young - you need to be with someone who is good for you - not who your going to be unhappy with.

Move on, be single - bang girls.

 

[Walden]

F***ing hell.

If I were in your shoes that woulda been a short conversation:

HB: Walden I don't think we should have sex so much...Walden...Walden...<sound of door slamming and Walden getting into his houpti>...<sounds of Walden driving off>...<sound of crickets chirruping>...<Crickets chirruping>...<now it's gone quiet>...<there it is again, chirruping>.

 

[Wyldfire]

It sounds to me like she feels the relationship is lacking something she needs to get from it and either she isn't able to communicate what that is or she has tried and you aren't hearing her. Chances are, she is looking for more attention and affection from you outside of anything that directly leads to or involves sex. This is even more likely if the only time you kiss or touch her it is when you want and push for sex.

Here is something you can try that might give her what she most likely wants and with a little patience should also make her want to have sex again and more often...

Make a point of kissing her neck softly from behind her and just gently hugging her, holding her hand and just looking at her and smiling for a minute, etc...and then get up and walk a few feet away and do something else for a couple of minutes and then go back to where she is and don't touch her in any way. This will give her the intimacy she's probably wanting without it always leading to sex. If you want her to actually want to have sex with you, this is something you need to do on a regular basis. Females aren't wired in the same way males are. Males don't need to be "warmed up" to be in the mood...all it takes is a thought or a warm breeze and they're in the mood...it's not like that with females...it takes time. If you don't make the effort to make her aroused and get her in the mood slowly, she's not going to like it very much when you do have sex.

 

[DJBen]

Originally posted by Walden
F***ing hell.

If I were in your shoes that woulda been a short conversation:

HB: Walden I don't think we should have sex so much...Walden...Walden...<sound of door slamming and Walden getting into his houpti>...<sounds of Walden driving off>...<sound of crickets chirruping>...<Crickets chirruping>...<now it's gone quiet>...<there it is again, chirruping>.

LMAO thats awesome

 

[Don Juanabbe]

This is the kind of behaviour that destroyed my 7 year relationship. My girlfriend got some bad advice from her feminista girlfriends and her own mother, and it blew up in her face. She was so desparate to try and gain control in the relationship and force me to buy her an engagement ring that it was withheld from me for nearly 3 months. I ended up in another woman's bed because of it, and I'll be damned if I'll ever feel guilty about it. I didn't want to do it, but......

 

[Cremasta]

You and your girl are not going to see eye to eye on this one. You are in a lose-lose situation my man.

But this...

Originally posted by Engetsu
In fact, she got bored of sex and wants to stop doing it for a while because we did it so often that it became less special to her, and she wants it to be something special.

is a load of rubbish. She's feeding you a line and what it comes down to is that she just does not show you enough intimacy.

Throw this back in her face. Go and find another girl who does put out more often and when your girl fronts you about it just say "Oh, it wasn't anything special, it didn't mean anything!"
Sorry... I have had to put up with this load of bollocks before and it is just that. Sex is not everything, but if you aren't getting enough, then everything else will go pear shaped not long after.

What is a girlfriend if you're not having sex with her??? that's right!!! she's just a friend.

 

[DJBen]

Sex is not everything, but if you aren't getting enough, then everything else will go pear shaped not long after.

That is 100% true. When an LTR comes towards the end, sex is a much more rare event. About as rare as seeing a flock of penguines knock on your door in the middle of summer claiming to be a small rebel group of tear-away motorcyclist from New Zealand.