K so I'll lay it out, we've been for several months now now, and after she had asked me multiple times, I agreed to be exclusive with her about two months ago.
She lives a little over an hour away. I don't look at it as an LDR because we see each other so frequently and an hour isn't a huge amount of time to travel to see someone.
So cut to the other night. She has a birthday party she's been telling me she's gonna go to for sometime now, for her gay friend that's a dude. She wanted me to go with her but I declined, I just wasn't feelin' hanging out with a bunch of gay guys, it's not really my thing.
I don't know if I'm just ignorant or if it never crossed my mind, but come to find out this birthday party is quite the little rager, with a theme. So she gets dressed up and sends me pics, and she was lookin' good. Not slutty but she definitely looked hot. She's a hot chick anyway though so I know she's gonna get attention wherever she goes. For some reason though I was a bit bugged when I found out it was a theme party. She hadn't mentioned anything about that, or that it was gonna be a rager, just made it seem like a normal somewhat chill get together.
So I'm not thrilled about her going, but I don't say anything about it. I withdraw some of my attention from her leading up to it but nothing that I think would scream "AFC". I just delayed longer than normal in answering her texts, if I answered them at all. I think she caught the drift as she sent me a few texts while she was there, a couple winks and smiley faces, a pic of her blowing me a kiss, and she said she showed her friends pics of me on her phone and they all said I was hot.
I don't hear from her for a while until about 1:30 am when she texts and tells me she's super drunk. This isn't a super rare occurrence for her but it's not a common one either. So immediately I'm thinking to myself, "great, my hot chick is at a party with a bunch of dudes who will no doubt be hitting on her, her inhibitions are gone, what good can come of this?" And so I begin to stew...it's 1:30 in the f*cking morning though so what the hell else am I gonna do? (before you ask why I wasn't out doing something fun--I was tired, it was a work night, I just wanted to relax and be by myself for a while).
Her roommate ended up driving them home, but by that time I had fallen asleep. I woke up about an hour later to find 20 (yes, 20) text messages from her, 3 missed calls and voicemails. Not only that but when I woke up my phone was ringing. So I picked up and we talked, and she immediately offered me phone sex. I was too tired and not nearly horny enough to be down with that so I declined. Then she told me about the party and what happened, and that her gay friend had brought a straight dude to set her up with. Well she ended up letting this guy take her phone so he could put his number in it. Then she let another dude do the same thing.
I asked her why and she said it's because she was just trying to save face and she figured it would be easier to let them do it and delete it later than to just shut them down.
I was a little put off by this and she could tell, because she started telling me how into me she is, how much she wants to be with me and only me, how this guy was a loser she would never even consider dating, blah blah blah. My thing is, why not just say you've got a boyfriend and you're not taking numbers? I'm not concerned about her calling them, and she was up front with me about it, but still. She took some dudes numbers. Does that seem disrespectful to you? Am I overreacting? How would you handle the situation?
I talked with her the next day and she told me she deleted both numbers and emphasized what a loser at least one of them was. That's all good and well, but now I'm somewhat concerned with her judgment. Why would you go to a party, all dressed up, where there are dudes who want you and you are being set up with, get hammered, get their number, etc etc? It's just like, use your freakin' head. What good do you think is going to come of that? I'm all for her having fun, but for chrissake at least be somewhat smart about it. Why would you even want to put yourself in this situation?
If we were seeing other people I wouldn't care. But I stopped spinning plates to be with her, and now I'm wondering if that was a mistake. If I felt like she was doing the same thing, and not putting herself in situations like these, I'd have no problem. I like this chick. She's hot, she's witty, she's funny, she's fun to be around, she's into me, but I dunno. The stress I was feeling last night while I was sitting around stewing...I just don't know if it's worth it. Am I being insecure? Should I get over it? Are any of my feelings justified? Taking thoughts...
She lives a little over an hour away. I don't look at it as an LDR because we see each other so frequently and an hour isn't a huge amount of time to travel to see someone.
So cut to the other night. She has a birthday party she's been telling me she's gonna go to for sometime now, for her gay friend that's a dude. She wanted me to go with her but I declined, I just wasn't feelin' hanging out with a bunch of gay guys, it's not really my thing.
I don't know if I'm just ignorant or if it never crossed my mind, but come to find out this birthday party is quite the little rager, with a theme. So she gets dressed up and sends me pics, and she was lookin' good. Not slutty but she definitely looked hot. She's a hot chick anyway though so I know she's gonna get attention wherever she goes. For some reason though I was a bit bugged when I found out it was a theme party. She hadn't mentioned anything about that, or that it was gonna be a rager, just made it seem like a normal somewhat chill get together.
So I'm not thrilled about her going, but I don't say anything about it. I withdraw some of my attention from her leading up to it but nothing that I think would scream "AFC". I just delayed longer than normal in answering her texts, if I answered them at all. I think she caught the drift as she sent me a few texts while she was there, a couple winks and smiley faces, a pic of her blowing me a kiss, and she said she showed her friends pics of me on her phone and they all said I was hot.
I don't hear from her for a while until about 1:30 am when she texts and tells me she's super drunk. This isn't a super rare occurrence for her but it's not a common one either. So immediately I'm thinking to myself, "great, my hot chick is at a party with a bunch of dudes who will no doubt be hitting on her, her inhibitions are gone, what good can come of this?" And so I begin to stew...it's 1:30 in the f*cking morning though so what the hell else am I gonna do? (before you ask why I wasn't out doing something fun--I was tired, it was a work night, I just wanted to relax and be by myself for a while).
Her roommate ended up driving them home, but by that time I had fallen asleep. I woke up about an hour later to find 20 (yes, 20) text messages from her, 3 missed calls and voicemails. Not only that but when I woke up my phone was ringing. So I picked up and we talked, and she immediately offered me phone sex. I was too tired and not nearly horny enough to be down with that so I declined. Then she told me about the party and what happened, and that her gay friend had brought a straight dude to set her up with. Well she ended up letting this guy take her phone so he could put his number in it. Then she let another dude do the same thing.
I asked her why and she said it's because she was just trying to save face and she figured it would be easier to let them do it and delete it later than to just shut them down.
I was a little put off by this and she could tell, because she started telling me how into me she is, how much she wants to be with me and only me, how this guy was a loser she would never even consider dating, blah blah blah. My thing is, why not just say you've got a boyfriend and you're not taking numbers? I'm not concerned about her calling them, and she was up front with me about it, but still. She took some dudes numbers. Does that seem disrespectful to you? Am I overreacting? How would you handle the situation?
I talked with her the next day and she told me she deleted both numbers and emphasized what a loser at least one of them was. That's all good and well, but now I'm somewhat concerned with her judgment. Why would you go to a party, all dressed up, where there are dudes who want you and you are being set up with, get hammered, get their number, etc etc? It's just like, use your freakin' head. What good do you think is going to come of that? I'm all for her having fun, but for chrissake at least be somewhat smart about it. Why would you even want to put yourself in this situation?
If we were seeing other people I wouldn't care. But I stopped spinning plates to be with her, and now I'm wondering if that was a mistake. If I felt like she was doing the same thing, and not putting herself in situations like these, I'd have no problem. I like this chick. She's hot, she's witty, she's funny, she's fun to be around, she's into me, but I dunno. The stress I was feeling last night while I was sitting around stewing...I just don't know if it's worth it. Am I being insecure? Should I get over it? Are any of my feelings justified? Taking thoughts...