Girlfriend cheated but now what

[Djjead12]

So my girlfriend cheated. Tried lying about it but finally admitted it. Tbh I had it coming. She’d been begging for more attention and affirmation but I was checked out to an extent. Just wasn’t feeling it as much and got cheated on. Basically a way for her to regain some power. Well of course I ended it. But here’s problem

I have a daughter and she has two daughters. We’ve been dating for over a year and past few months they’ve been spending lots of time together and basically are like sisters and best friends. I’m devastated for my daughter. Do I still set up play dates for them? I’m leaning yes. Hope is can just slowly die down the amount of time they hang out together (ages 6,5,3) and by time school starts in a month can die it down even more. Thoughts? I canbe mature about it for my daughter although it will make things harder. Even though I was starting to check out of the relationship it still hurts like a *****. Long term Breakups suck. Not really wanting advice for myself more so advice on how to make it easiest on my daughter to “say goodbye”

 

[SW15]

No interaction ever again between you and the cheater. The whole thing is painful. As time goes on, it is best to close this chapter of your life and focus on the next chapter.

 

[BigFoot04]

So my girlfriend cheated. Tried lying about it but finally admitted it. Tbh I had it coming. She’d been begging for more attention and affirmation but I was checked out to an extent. Just wasn’t feeling it as much and got cheated on. Basically a way for her to regain some power. Well of course I ended it. But here’s problem

I have a daughter and she has two daughters. We’ve been dating for over a year and past few months they’ve been spending lots of time together and basically are like sisters and best friends. I’m devastated for my daughter. Do I still set up play dates for them? I’m leaning yes. Hope is can just slowly die down the amount of time they hang out together (ages 6,5,3) and by time school starts in a month can die it down even more. Thoughts? I canbe mature about it for my daughter although it will make things harder. Even though I was starting to check out of the relationship it still hurts like a *****. Long term Breakups suck. Not really wanting advice for myself more so advice on how to make it easiest on my daughter to “say goodbye”

Because the kids are so young , they won't remember them for long , but like the guy said above , no contact even to set up play dates , she'll try to reel you back in and **** on you again.

 

[SirBigBell]

Kids make and forget friends at a very rapid pace, so to them this wont be as big a deal as you think.

From about the age of 30 we start to lose friends each year, until some die completely alone in their old age. Children dont have that problem.

 

[TheKid]

You walk and dont look back. You make it known to people that your not like the rest.
Its hard being at the top.

 

[stovepipe]

Me personally, if you cheat I walk away and make you disappear from my life as if you never existed. While it might hurt your daughter, she'll get over it. If you stay friends or whatever you wanna call it for the sake of the kids, it will give the ex power, at least she'd look at it that way. Only you know what's best for you. I just can't look at someone the same ever again when they disrespect me at level.

When people say they deserved getting cheating on, I disagree. If someone is that unhappy they have to cheat, have respect for yourself & your partner and exit the relationship. It takes more courage to leave than to cheat.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

That sucks op, but you gotta leave her, your daughter will make new friends. She will understand when she gets older, just make up something

 

[SammyNfor]

Leave and never look back!

 

[2Rocky]

my GF and I have an agreement we won't lie, cheat or steal from each other. It is a one strike policy.

My analogy is a bird cage...You are welcome in to my cage. I'll leave the door open because it is not there to lock you in. If you leave...I'll lock you out.

 

[Epimanes]

I like the bird cage analogy...

 

[Barrister]

So my girlfriend cheated. Tried lying about it but finally admitted it. Tbh I had it coming. She’d been begging for more attention and affirmation but I was checked out to an extent. Just wasn’t feeling it as much and got cheated on. Basically a way for her to regain some power. Well of course I ended it. But here’s problem

I have a daughter and she has two daughters. We’ve been dating for over a year and past few months they’ve been spending lots of time together and basically are like sisters and best friends. I’m devastated for my daughter. Do I still set up play dates for them? I’m leaning yes. Hope is can just slowly die down the amount of time they hang out together (ages 6,5,3) and by time school starts in a month can die it down even more. Thoughts? I canbe mature about it for my daughter although it will make things harder. Even though I was starting to check out of the relationship it still hurts like a *****. Long term Breakups suck. Not really wanting advice for myself more so advice on how to make it easiest on my daughter to “say goodbye”

No - I have a daughter your kids' ages (age 6). This is a very young age and she will miss them for a few months but will move on. Kids are incredibly resilient. In fact, by allowing them to continue to interact you are setting yourself up for grief down the line. Just move on and find other activities in the meantime to keep your kids' occupied and their minds off things.

It is a sad situation and I feel for you as a fellow dad. Sh1t gets so complicated when you begin introducing kids into the mix.