Girl with a boyfriend is texting me

[Uncharted]

Met a girl, she gave me her number, I asked her out, she said she has a BF. I normally take this as a rejection and move on. She texted me this morning just to say hi and ask how my weekend went. What do you guys do in this situation? Do you ignore her or just respond nicely? I don't want a text buddy. I'm thinking of something like " you seem kind of cool but I don't think we should talk until you're single".

 

[Fruitbat]

Met a girl, she gave me her number, I asked her out, she said she has a BF. I normally take this as a rejection and move on. She texted me this morning just to say hi and ask how my weekend went. What do you guys do in this situation? Do you ignore her or just respond nicely? I don't want a text buddy. I'm thinking of something like " you seem kind of cool but I don't think we should talk until you're single".

Had this recently with 2 girls, both with BF.

She is MOST PROBABLY an attention ***** who is looking for some validation she is still attractive.

The only answer is - do not be her friend and for gods sake don't be her text buddy. You are giving her your texting time for what?

Ask her out, and make it pretty damn clear from the start what you are interested in.

AW's need to be called out early, if she meets, escalate. Make it lewd and sexual from the start. If she is AWing you she will back off or play back, either way, if she doesn't meet you, it's not happening.

the other thing is, don't be afraid she will think "he only wants to speak to me to get in my panties". Women who text men or initiate contact with men know EXACTLY what a guy will think (unless there is a genuine reason, like she wants to borrow something)

EDIT Didn't see you already asked the chick out - what TheException said below then

 

[TheException]

Do you ignore her or just respond nicely?

Neither. Respond like you normally would gaming a girl. If you ignore her, or say that line you wanted to say....you destroy any chance of her developing attraction. If you respond "nicely"...its supplicating. Keep texting to a minimum(just enough to peak her interest/drive up attraction) and rarely initiate the texting. NEVER INITIATE a date again now since she has a bf and declined your previous attempt....you have other plates so keep spinning them and put her on the backburner. As your other thread indicated never NC a girl or tell her "not to talk to you until shes single"(a new girl not an ex)....you never know....she may become attracted and hit you up to hang out.

 

[Uncharted]

I figured. Seems similar to my other thread.

 

[Uncharted]

Do you ignore her or just respond nicely?

Neither. Respond like you normally would gaming a girl. If you ignore her, or say that line you wanted to say....you destroy any chance of her developing attraction. If you respond "nicely"...its supplicating. Keep texting to a minimum(just enough to peak her interest/drive up attraction) and rarely initiate the texting. NEVER INITIATE a date again now since she has a bf and declined your previous attempt....you have other plates so keep spinning them and put her on the backburner. As your other thread indicated never NC a girl or tell her "not to talk to you until shes single"(a new girl not an ex)....you never know....she may become attracted and hit you up to hang out.

I normally only use text/phone to set up dates so I guess I will minimize initiating contact and just see how it goes.

 

[pdx1138]

Ya never ruin a future possibility by telling them off.

It's amazing how quickly they go from having a boyfriend, to being single, when you make their cootch tingle.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

I immediately go NC when I hear the boyfriend line. Here is why:

If she's interested, you won't ever hear that bf line. You wouldn't believe how ridiculous a girl will be to rationalize/justify going out with a guy that she is really interested in alone when she has a bf. She will somehow turn the blame on her bf and act like the victim to be with you. Then she will tell her bf "well it just happened". Right. It just "happened" on its own.

What if it is a "sh1t test"? Anyone following my advice recently will know that I feel sh1t tests are actually very rare and most of the time a "sh1t test" is really disinterest which has been misinterpreted as a sh1t test. Most people just read too much PUA garbage and don't know the difference.

What if it really is a sh1t test? Okay, let us say for the sake of argument that it really is a sh1t test. Here is the deal: girls have WAY more options than the average guy. They can play these games till the cows come home for sh1ts and giggles simply because they have options and they can afford to play. The only way to win this game as a guy is to never play. Otherwise, you will spend the entire balance of your relationship with her jumping through every hoop she displays like a show dog.

 

[plate's_empty]

Ya never ruin a future possibility by telling them off.

It's amazing how quickly they go from having a boyfriend, to being single, when you make their cootch tingle.

^^^^Very true. Going NC isn't something I would consider telling them off. It's making a statement: "you've got a boyfriend, I've got better things to do than play little orbiter games with you and wait around for the possible day that you're single."

So, like TillTheEndOfTime said, I would go NC. Ignore, indifference. They'll figure out the reason for you going NC. And, when they're newly available, they'll remember you.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

So, like TillTheEndOfTime said, I would go NC. Ignore, indifference. They'll figure out the reason for you going NC. And, when they're newly available, they'll remember you.

Yup. But NEVER "wait" for them. Ever. If something happens, then great. Just think of it like one of life's little bonuses. But don't expect or anticipate it to ever turn in your favour. You have to always assume these are lost causes and move on full strength.

 

[LiveFreeX]

TTEOT: I think you are right in your theory but this is an opportunity for him to set things right with her in practice.

Op: Call her a slvt and tell her you are disgusted by her behaviour. Tell her if she continues on her current path she will likely end up a single mother. Ask her what her father would think if he knew she was going to cheat on her boyfriend or what her boyfriend would think if he found out about her? Tell her she must disrespect her boyfriend pretty heavily and you aren't interested in taking on his role.

Tell her: Once a cheater always a cheater and you are too much of a high quality man to associate with scumbags like her.

Guys please, use your skills to correct women's wayward behavior not encourage it.

 

[VladPatton]

I agree with your initial line of "you seem kind of cool but I don't think we should talk until you're single" or throw in something to the effect of "does your boyfriend approve of you chattin up single guys?"

Sort of call her out on it in a playful way to let her know you actually have boundaries that cannot be broken be her unfathomable, model-esque beauty and princess-like charm.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

If you call her out of give her an ultimatum in any way you'll never hear from her again. Your best option right now is be non-nonchalant. You can respond to her texts, but do not initiate anything with her and do not ask her out again. Like others have said put her on the back burner. A day may come when she hits you up after getting rid of her boyfriend, but don't sit around waiting for it to happen.

 

[macallik]

^^^ What he said. Going NC or setting an ultimatum appears insecure and is a low probability play. As long as you have other options in your life, no problem in keeping her as an orbiter or turning her into a pivot until she is DTF

 

[Cremasta]

Do you ignore her or just respond nicely?

Neither. If you don't really care about this girl, then have fun with this one.

Send her texts that suggest you've maybe already hooked up. Something like "What do you mean 'how was my weekend?' I thought we had a great time together!"
Maybe the bf will snoop all the text messages she's getting, see one of them and then kick her to the curb... no more boyfriend!

Right now, you're in the friendzone only because there's a bf in the picture. Sending 'nice' texts will put you there permanently.