girl seing another dude, wtf?

[pyros]

so I met this chick some days ago. SHe's a HB7.5.
We danced one song, talked for a bit and got her number.

Today a few days later, I texted her to ask her out and she replied this...:

her: "sounds great. I am free everyday until 20:00h. But I'd like to let you know that I'm kind of seing another guy at the moment"


This is a first for me. What do I do? I thought about :
a) telling her that once she's done with the guy to let me know
b) that Im seing a girl too, so I dont mind what she does when she's not with me

 

[bcolon]

her: "sounds great. I am free everyday until 20:00h. But I'd like to let you know that I'm kind of seing another guy at the moment".

Clearly she isn't interested in you. Time to move on.

 

[LMFAO]

You can try a little and see how she responds "I'm seeing another guy too, but I don't feel the need to brag about it, <x> bar Tuesday, cool? ". What's the worst that could happen?

But yes her comment clearly states that she's in someone's else's castle right now/riding someone else's c*** and that she has low interest.

 

[No.Danny]

Be like " oh really. I'd like to meet him someday, maybe we're seeing the same guy."

 

[BackInTheGame78]

"It's cool, I'm not the jealous type. Meet me Tuesday at xxxx 8pm. Don't be late"

Or "Make sure you don't bring him, I might be more attracted to him than you. Wouldn't want you to get jealous. Meet me Tuesday at xxxx 8pm. Don't be late"

And just continue as if she never said anything about it

 

[Pimp-sicle]

"It's cool, I'm not the jealous type. Meet me Tuesday at xxxx 8pm. Don't be late"

Or "Make sure you don't bring him, I might be more attracted to him than you. Wouldn't want you to get jealous. Meet me Tuesday at xxxx 8pm. Don't be late"

And just continue as if she never said anything about it

Spot on.

She's seeing someone, who cares. As long as you keep meeting new girls, you can hang out with her and see how things go.

As BackInTheGame said don't get jealous or make a big deal and carry on.









PIMP

 

[TheCWord]

Ya, whatever you go with, be very clear with her that you're not hanging out as friends, pyros. Then if she comes out anyway you won't have to worry about anything because you'll know she's interested, you can escalate pretty quickly.

I would personally say something like, "Better not tell him we're going out then. So (whatever place) at (whatever time)?"

She'll either say "haha ok see you then" or ignore you or tell you she's loyal to her BF and respectfully turns down your offer.

 

[dasein]

All attractive women today are "kind of seeing another guy." It's noise, ignore it, don't try to interpret it or make sense of it, and proceed by the following "binary type" of process,

1. Does she accept your invitations to spend time alone without hemming, hawing or flaking? If yes,

2. Does she respond favorably to your escalating physical advances?

If the answers to the above stop being "yes," then after a certain point, sooner rather than later, next and move on. Keep your process binary, ignore noise, keep yourself sane. Never get bogged in their noise, and absolutely don't make it an issue by indulging her into "heart to hearts" or heavy relationship type topics. Work your plan of flirting with and seducing her sexually until it is no longer worth your time to do so.

If she had nixxed you already, the "kind of seeing" would have been "boyfriend" from the start, so you are on a relatively level field here IMO. It's -good- that she has a primary focus on this other guy and not 8 guys in the picture like so many of the more attractive ones have. Use that to your advantage.

When I meet a new attractive woman, I never assume she was just totally alone in life waiting for me to come along. I envision 4-5 guys standing over her shoulder, exes, FWB, orbiters, coworkers, all trying to do what I am trying to do, have her primary sexual response directed my way and not their way.

 

[logicallefty]

"Awesome I'm seeing another girl too when can you come have a threesome with us? Your guy can watch"

 

[stevo]

I would personally say something like, "Better not tell him we're going out then. So (whatever place) at (whatever time)?"

She'll either say "haha ok see you then" or ignore you or tell you she's loyal to her BF and respectfully turns down your offer.

Spot On C!

She's just going to be a plate. Do not give up too easily man common might be a test/screen process but if it aint we still pull, you don't care if she has a man, you're not looking to marry her.

Play it off.

She says: I'm kind of seeing somebody
You say: Aint we all? I'd like to get with you though, when are you free this week?

You got options? Oh me too!

 

[Cremasta]

She's spinning plates, just like many guys on this forum would advise you to do.

This is the important part of the message:

her: "sounds great. I am free everyday until 20:00h.

You only danced with her for one song, it's a bit early in the game to be expecting exclusivity.

a) is just shooting down an opportunity unnecessarily
b) is kinda petty (the first half, if it's not true)

The right answer is c) just go have fun.

 

[backbreaker]

Great post dude above me lol

 

[pyros]

so I replied after one hour:

me: "its ok, this way you wont mind that Im seing another girl too, but its casual. What about Monday at 17;00 at X place?"

her: "that sounds cool. I'll see you on Monday!"

Game on...

P.S.
I said that this was a first for me but now that I think about it, two other girls told me something similar in the first or second date. One told me on the first date that she was getting to know another guy and that her ex was around blah blah. Never heard from her after that date.
The second girl that told me that she was meeting a few guys recently, after date number two she told me that she just wanted to focus on me. I banged her a few times and saw her for two months or so.

We'll see.

 

[stevo]

Hahaha girls! girls!! girls!!! dont you just love them!

Game ON!!!! Just do your thing, go for lay!

 

[Bingo-Player]

All attractive women today are "kind of seeing another guy." It's noise, ignore it, don't try to interpret it or make sense of it, and proceed by the following "binary type" of process,

1. Does she accept your invitations to spend time alone without hemming, hawing or flaking? If yes,

2. Does she respond favorably to your escalating physical advances?

If the answers to the above stop being "yes," then after a certain point, sooner rather than later, next and move on. Keep your process binary, ignore noise, keep yourself sane. Never get bogged in their noise, and absolutely don't make it an issue by indulging her into "heart to hearts" or heavy relationship type topics. Work your plan of flirting with and seducing her sexually until it is no longer worth your time to do so.

If she had nixxed you already, the "kind of seeing" would have been "boyfriend" from the start, so you are on a relatively level field here IMO. It's -good- that she has a primary focus on this other guy and not 8 guys in the picture like so many of the more attractive ones have. Use that to your advantage.

When I meet a new attractive woman, I never assume she was just totally alone in life waiting for me to come along. I envision 4-5 guys standing over her shoulder, exes, FWB, orbiters, coworkers, all trying to do what I am trying to do, have her primary sexual response directed my way and not their way.

^^^ do this

 

[mangotot]

She probably setting the frame for you to be one of the beta orbiters. Forget her and move on. Its totally bold of a girl to say she is seeing others even at a new stage of courtship.

 

[TheCWord]

She probably setting the frame for you to be one of the beta orbiters. Forget her and move on. Its totally bold of a girl to say she is seeing others even at a new stage of courtship.

^not this

And I'm proud of your response, pyros. I still worry about you over gaming - that whole specifically mentioning you seeing another girl rather than just being cool and having her infer that you are obviously seeing other women was borderline - but so far, so good. Seems like you're learning. I'd have given your post a + rep but I've neg repped you so many times it won't let me. Haha.

 

[pyros]

So I think I kind of overgamed her last night. See this:

I went to have dinner with some of my salsa friends. When we were done this chick texted me asking me if I was having dinner with some salseros. I was shocked, and asked her how the f-uck did she know that.
She replied that they took some pictures and put them in some whatsapp group in which she is also, and that she saw me in a picture with a girl.

I nodded, and she said:

her: is that the girl you told me you're kind of dating?
(and then sent me the pic)
me: nope, she wished.
her: hahaha ok, just text me once you get in the salsa club, I'm also going.
me: ok


I texted her, and around one hour later she came to the salsa club. She said hello to me and hugged me, we talked for a bit, we danced one song, and then she said that she was gonna talk to some friends.

When I left I texted her:
me: hey, I'm going home, see you.

I saw this morning that she texted me at 06:30 am:

her: heeeeeey
her: you left before I had the chance to see you again, why??
her: ok, good night Pyros.
her: Im getting home now hahahah

at 12:30 pm:

me:
her: you're a bit dry, arent you?
me: me? of course not
me: I see you just slept 6 hours
her: yes, it depends
me: and what are your plans for today?

(a few hours later)
her: boat
me: haha, so posh. I have to babysit my nephew...

That was it. We're suposed to meet tomorrow at 17:00h. I think I kind of overgamed her cause she showed a bit of jealousy when she asked me about that girl. Then in her last texts she showed hat she wanted to see me more last night etc, and I just replied with:
so she complained, game me one word answer (boat), took several hours to reply and did not comment on my last text.

Opinions?

 

[TheCWord]

October 18th:

I still worry about you over gaming

October 19th:

So I think I kind of overgamed her last night.

I hope to god you're not just wasting my time, pyros. This has a train wreck feel but it's avoidable. If this train crashes, I am not hopping on your next one to help!

Now, on to your report. I don't think you over gamed her. Honestly? I think you're doing GREAT!

So I'm going to plead with you to slam on the brakes at this point. Don't even think about how to game her. Just coast. She is INTO YOU. That line about you seeing another girl clearly got her hamster running. She was stalking you online. She came out to see you in person. She got upset when you bailed early. I mean this pyros, you are killing it right now!

You really don't have to do anything else at this point. She is already chasing you. She already thinks you're cool. If you try to pull out a DJ line or act too cool, things could backfire, so seriously: go on your date, let her do most of the talking, make sure you kiss close (at least) then don't commit to another date with her, text her in a few days.

This girl has a certain image of you, pyros. It's going to stay that way unless you do something to change her mind. So just relaxxxxxxxx. Have fun on your date. Be yourself - just make sure you avoid any nervous or needy habits that you may still be trying to break.

DON'T OVER ANALYZE. DON'T OVERTHINK. Because this girl is already over analyzing you. She's overthinking you. Just hang back and let her see you for the cool, high value guy she perceives you to be. Keep her talking, ask follow-up questions, don't give too much on your responses, and just don't try too hard. You will be golden as long as you just coast.

Just coast, man.

 

[Stugots26]

I'm late to post but I've had a busy weekend.

I'd first direct your attention to "at the moment." Her mindset is that the current guy could only be temporary if he screws up.

You shouldn't let this move you off center because most guys will fvck it up eventually.

My stock response to this is, "Well, that's ok, he can keep you busy when you're not with me."

And remember - no one, including you, is entitled to commitment.