Girl REJECTED my invitation...

[spax]

- Met girl at bar and hooked up with her.
- Got her phone number.
- Texted her on Friday asking her to come join my friends and me in the city for drinks.
- She said she was going out of town for the weekend but did not suggest another time or rescheduling.
- She closed off her message with her name "Jess x"

Did not reply. Should I reply? Her excuse seemed a bit flakey to be honest, so should I bother suggesting another day or putting it on her?

At the moment I am thinking something like "All good, perhaps another time." or "No problem, hit me up sometime when you're in town"

Thoughts? Or should I just ignore her message and wait for her to message me again if she wants to see me?

Cheers

 

[spax]

You said you "hooked up with her"

That means sexual intercourse - was that in the bar, your place or her place?

In my neck of the woods, hook up = make out. :yes: This occurred on the dance floor.

 

[LMFAO]

- Met girl at bar and hooked up with her.
- Got her phone number.
- Texted her on Friday asking her to come join my friends and me in the city for drinks.
- She said she was going out of town for the weekend but did not suggest another time or rescheduling.
- She closed off her message with her name "Jess x"

Did not reply. Should I reply? Her excuse seemed a bit flakey to be honest, so should I bother suggesting another day or putting it on her?

At the moment I am thinking something like "All good, perhaps another time." or "No problem, hit me up sometime when you're in town"

Thoughts? Or should I just ignore her message and wait for her to message me again if she wants to see me?

Cheers

You can reply with something simple like "Ok", or just don't reply at all. Don't suggest another time.

This is why it's usually best to phone for dates. You can better sense the vibe from her and have a (more) normal conversation without trying to decipher each others' cryptic words. Particularly hers.

Some girls will message you again when they do want to see you. I had a flake message me three weeks later apologising she vanished. You could wait for her in which case she'll be chasing you, but it's less common since girls don't like to chase too often as they know it puts them in a weak position so would rather just meet a fresh guy to start all over again (they are very pragmatic in dating much more than most guys who believe in fairy tales). Alternatively text her in 4 days, wait for her to respond (if she does) and then immediately call her. If she's still busy laugh and proceed to delete her number.

Meanwhile look for other girls. A kiss in this day and age means nothing. It means little to her and so should mean little to you.

 

[Heisenberg]

I'm going to feel like a dink writing a "Damn, I'm old" post under Mauser, but here I go

Guys, reading some posts on here makes me realize: getting older is just freaking terrific. Now, I'm still relatively young, turning 30 shortly, but a lot of growing happens in 10 years, a lot of experience, and I read posts like the OP's and I can't help but remember when I used to do the exact same stuff, and can't help but be amazed how that type of thinking has totally vanished from my brain.

If I were in my early to mid 20s, I would personally be on the edge of my seat, so freaking excited to get just a little bit older. To have all that space in my brain that used to be occupied by the silliest things like wondering what a girl's thinking and coming up with a clever text - instead used for more productive things.

I write this post as part-diary, but part-smack-on-the-head to spax and other SoSuavers who spend so much time analyzing girl's text messages and saying things like, "so, I'm thinking this would be a clever reply to send back to her, what do you guys think?" Guys... it doesn't matter. As you become a more complete human, you won't even want to bother with any woman who sends you anything but the clearest of signals. Even if you don't have an abundance of other plates to spin, you'll be ruthless with the way you cut girls out on strike 1 - simply because you are a busy man with lots going on, lots to offer, and any girl who isn't making things easy for you isn't worth the time you'd spend on a date together. Let alone any time you might spend constructing witty replies or Double Your Dating-esque strategies to "win" them over.

5+ years ago, I don't think somebody telling me all this would've mattered. I didn't have my sh!t together as much and I still placed too great an importance on female attention. I'd be just like spax. But if reading this can help any of the "younger" dudes to inch closer to their "a-ha" moment, then perhaps this rant had some purpose.

 

[Bling]

I'm going to feel like a dink writing a "Damn, I'm old" post under Mauser, but here I go

Guys, reading some posts on here makes me realize: getting older is just freaking terrific. Now, I'm still relatively young, turning 30 shortly, but a lot of growing happens in 10 years, a lot of experience, and I read posts like the OP's and I can't help but remember when I used to do the exact same stuff, and can't help but be amazed how that type of thinking has totally vanished from my brain.

If I were in my early to mid 20s, I would personally be on the edge of my seat, so freaking excited to get just a little bit older. To have all that space in my brain that used to be occupied by the silliest things like wondering what a girl's thinking and coming up with a clever text - instead used for more productive things.

I write this post as part-diary, but part-smack-on-the-head to spax and other SoSuavers who spend so much time analyzing girl's text messages and saying things like, "so, I'm thinking this would be a clever reply to send back to her, what do you guys think?" Guys... it doesn't matter. As you become a more complete human, you won't even want to bother with any woman who sends you anything but the clearest of signals. Even if you don't have an abundance of other plates to spin, you'll be ruthless with the way you cut girls out on strike 1 - simply because you are a busy man with lots going on, lots to offer, and any girl who isn't making things easy for you isn't worth the time you'd spend on a date together. Let alone any time you might spend constructing witty replies or Double Your Dating-esque strategies to "win" them over.

5+ years ago, I don't think somebody telling me all this would've mattered. I didn't have my sh!t together as much and I still placed too great an importance on female attention. I'd be just like spax. But if reading this can help any of the "younger" dudes to inch closer to their "a-ha" moment, then perhaps this rant had some purpose.

I needed this post. Thanks man.

 

[Donaldinho]

Pretty much what everyone else said above, but what I have to add is that you asked her to hang out with you and your friends.
I think you would've had better success going 1 on 1.
Also, hooking up means sex, making out = making out.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I'm going to feel like a dink writing a "Damn, I'm old" post under Mauser, but here I go

Guys, reading some posts on here makes me realize: getting older is just freaking terrific. Now, I'm still relatively young, turning 30 shortly, but a lot of growing happens in 10 years, a lot of experience, and I read posts like the OP's and I can't help but remember when I used to do the exact same stuff, and can't help but be amazed how that type of thinking has totally vanished from my brain.

If I were in my early to mid 20s, I would personally be on the edge of my seat, so freaking excited to get just a little bit older. To have all that space in my brain that used to be occupied by the silliest things like wondering what a girl's thinking and coming up with a clever text - instead used for more productive things.

I write this post as part-diary, but part-smack-on-the-head to spax and other SoSuavers who spend so much time analyzing girl's text messages and saying things like, "so, I'm thinking this would be a clever reply to send back to her, what do you guys think?" Guys... it doesn't matter. As you become a more complete human, you won't even want to bother with any woman who sends you anything but the clearest of signals. Even if you don't have an abundance of other plates to spin, you'll be ruthless with the way you cut girls out on strike 1 - simply because you are a busy man with lots going on, lots to offer, and any girl who isn't making things easy for you isn't worth the time you'd spend on a date together. Let alone any time you might spend constructing witty replies or Double Your Dating-esque strategies to "win" them over.

5+ years ago, I don't think somebody telling me all this would've mattered. I didn't have my sh!t together as much and I still placed too great an importance on female attention. I'd be just like spax. But if reading this can help any of the "younger" dudes to inch closer to their "a-ha" moment, then perhaps this rant had some purpose.

+1. Very well said.

 

[TheGambino]

Exactley what Heisenberg said.

Just reply with Ok no worries after a couple of hours. If shes interested she will counter offer and reach out otherwise ask her out again a couple of weeks later. If she refuses again delete her number.

It's not so hard spin plates